Picture Drama

[slickaz]

so quick question.

lets say theres this girl.
shes a 9 to look at, she's young, BnA and lips that you know exactly how to use.
shes 20, and she's never had a real boyfriend. she sees you as the guy she wants to be with for ever.
she's sweet etc. but! shes slightly immature as in new to relationships. so she doesnt know what to do sometimes. and being 20, still acts like a 14 yr old sometimes.

now lets say you were talking to her online, since you were overseas for work.
she has a picture of you on her msn with her.
then she sees you and changes it to one of her friends and her.

to which you say "hehee you changed ur pic "
and somehow this leads to her and you changing pics as a game.

then she changes it to a pic of her and ANOTHER GUY, this other guy is a good friend of hers who lives overseas. but in the pic he is standing behind her, and to you it looks like he's holding her but thats coz msn has squinted the pic.

anyway would you get mad?
is there reason for you to get mad?
should you express that to her?
seeing as she could be the girl you wanna be in an LTR with, after a VERY LONG break from LTR's?

is she allowed to get mad at you for NOT getting mad at the pic of her another guy?

does she deserve the door for that?

what if the fact that you werent phased by it had her calling you overseas immediately and apologized and told you you mean more than everything to her and she was an idiot for playing that game, and she is disappointed in herself for taking it that low.

 

[JDA70]

Hi

anyway would you get mad?

no.

is there reason for you to get mad?

not really.

should you express that to her?

UM... no.

seeing as she could be the girl you wanna be in an LTR with, after a VERY LONG break from LTR's?

I don't understand what your asking here.

is she allowed to get mad at you for NOT getting mad at the pic of her another guy?

no.

 

[slickaz]

Thanks dude..
very straight forward..nice..

i didnt get mad yday when she did it, but i did say i had to turn in and good night.
which she said ok to. Then immediately after, rings me to apologize.
to which i said yeh ok thats cool, nothing to apologize about.
she got mad at me for taking it too easily. and she doesnt mean much to me.
so i had to break it down to her that it doesnt phase me that shes got a pic of her and a friend up.
i also said this "You can do whatever you want, im not going to control you, but im not going to stand around and watch you do smtn i dont like either.."

was that too harsh? after i said that tho, she seemed to get slightly happier and as if control is she what she wanted.

is she being childish? is she seeking attention?
is it that she hasnt been in a relationship so she doesnt know the difference between trying to be make a guy jealous and try to push a guy away?
what is it?!

 

[R19]

was that too harsh? after i said that tho, she seemed to get slightly happier and as if control is she what she wanted.

Can you re-state? Didn't understand the trail end.

 

[Jitterbug]

Are you really sure you want a serious relationship with someone this childish? She's like a 14 y.o kid. Even you said that.

 

[slickaz]

lol.
I feel you man, this is why i wanna know if all young girls are like this.
Ive been out of a LTR for a long time so the girls i fvk with dont do stuff like this, coz i drop em like a beat from a kick drum.

she's great in other ways tho, like she cooks,cleans,loves to take care of me, lets me be the man and alla that good wifey stuff.

so i dont know if young girls just have this problem? im 25 and i dont remember 21yr olds acting like this when i was 21. but then again, kids nowadays are getting younger at an older age.

R19: what i meant is, does she like that im controlling? because after i gave her the threat of losing me if she does something i dont like, she realized this was serious and switched tac, becoming alot more mature talking and lovey dovey.
im flying back tomorow night and she's gonna pick me up and drive me home, where she'd have made dinner at hers, after that we'll go to my place and she usually wakes up and cleans up the house after i go to work and lets herself out, not before she cooks me dinner for the night, unless she comes back around 7 after her gym.
maybe ill talk to her then..
should i talk to her about this? if so how should i go about it? advanced advice plz!

 

[R19]

I thinks it's good if you show initiative and that you are willing to pull away a lot harder than her placing that pic up may have signified. It could be a sh1t test to see how you would react. Whether you would get all nervous, worried, and concerned. There are smarter guys on here though to listen to....

 

[slickaz]

hahah yeh ill wait for the other lads to post up and see if i can come up with a good way to approach this.

id like for her to stop doing this.
we have had this drama before with her wanting to annoy me or get to me and then me having to get pissed then she gets all lovey dovey and loves fixing it..

im thinkin maybe i should fake it..but why should i fake anything!

 

[MisterMcGee]

She just wanted to feel like she was your girl. Stop over analyzing - that goes for everyone.

 

[KontrollerX]

"shes slightly immature as in new to relationships. so she doesnt know what to do sometimes. and being 20, still acts like a 14 yr old sometimes."

Oh for fvck's sakes.

Guys always fall for this sh!t or make the rationalization oh she's 18-20 she's so immature she doesn't know what she's doing in relationships yet, she doesn't realize she shouldn't be hanging around all these other guys or playing games, or or or, blah blah blah.

The truth is at 16 the government trusts a kid's judgement and mental faculties enough to let them get a driver's license and drive a vehicle that will if improperly operated cause that kid to kill large numbers of people as well themself.

At 18 the governments of the world allow young people to sign up for military service where they get to operate deadly weaponry that is meant to kill other people with but could also kill them if improperly operated.

At age 21 the government allows most people to go into bars and get drunk knowing full well they could possibly then go get into a drunk driving accident that would then kill a lot of people.

Anyway though you know where I'm going with all this?

Probably not so I'll let you know...

16-21 the government trusts women's mental faculties enough, trusts them enough with various responsibilities that could endanger their life and others yet here you and most guys are still making excuses for young women and saying oh she doesn't know what she's doing, she's immature, she doesn't know how to maintain a relationship.

And I'm saying you are almost nearly dead wrong.

I say nearly because of course being so young she can't be an expert on relationships as a matter of fact due to lack of vast life experience but at these ages she does know enough of what to do if she wants to maintain a relationship with a certain guy.

The government trusts such a woman to not be dumb enough to kill large numbers of people by putting powerful responsibilities in her hands.

The government believes that at certain ages kids and those who have just become adults know exactly what they are doing to the point that if they do the wrong thing severely enough they can be punished with jail or prison.

So basically what I'm saying is the government doesn't underestimate a woman's ability to know right from wrong on serious matters so why are you and so many other young guy's underestimating it?

These girls in the 16-21 age and up KNOW EXACTLY WHAT THEY ARE DOING!!!

If they are treating you like a chump...

If they are playing games with you...

If they are flaking on you...

It is because they have correctly deemed you are weak enough to let them get away with it and they know that you are so dependent on them that they can do this all that they please and you won't leave them.

You'll just keep on taking the abuse.

These girls know you will never put your foot down and demand an end to games and bullsh!t drama because without them you won't have any other girl to turn to.

So for the final time...

YOUNG GIRLS AGED 16-21 IN THE EYES OF THE GOVERNMENT KNOW ENOUGH TO BE GIVEN GREAT RESPONSIBILITY, THE GOVERNMENT DOESN'T UNDERESTIMATE THEIR MENTAL FACULTIES SO WHY ARE YOU YOUNG GUYS SO BUSY MAKING EXCUSES FOR THEM DOING SOMETHING THAT YOU DON'T LIKE?

WHY ARE YOU YOUNG GUYS UNDERESTIMATING YOUNG WOMEN'S MENTAL FACULTIES WHEN EVEN THE GOVERNMENT DOES NOT??

I'll tell you because you guys do not want to set the frame of how your relationship is going to be for fear that the girl won't agree and then you'll have to start all over again.

Man up, set the frame and if the b!tch disagrees find someone else.

It may not be easy but its the right g0ddamned decision to make so start making it.

 

[DJDamage]

anyway would you get mad?.

I may get annoyed a bit, because I would realise that she in fact put a picture of her and some "guy friend" oribtor (who no doubt wants to fvck her) however I wouldn't let her know that it bothers me. Why? because the virtual world to a woman is like a playhouse with no rules. Whatever comes to her head she will put it on the net without thinking about the potential consequences. Women are really bad at doing stuff without thinking first (not that I am excusing this behaviour)

Think of it like Facebook, there are probably plenty of pictures of your woman with other guys there but does that make any different if they were taken before you met her? As long as they are guy friends (orbitors) whom she never fvcked with then it doesn't make a difference. All women are attention wh0res to some degree.

is there reason for you to get mad?

No you can simple ask casually "who's the guy with you" or ignore it. If the guy in the picture is not an ex flame or currently not affecting your relationship with her, then its meaningless.

should you express that to her?

I would refrain from conveying any emotional frustrations with her because of a picture, its her actions in the real world that you need to be concerned with, and sometimes a picture is just a picture.

does she deserve the door for that?

Depends. If those are pictures with her old flames she fvcked with and she waving it in front of your face, then that's a sign of disrespect. If this is not corrected, then its a sign of things to come in the near future of other forms of disrespect. Some women just lack a sense of appropriate conduct because they grown up so used to having chumps eating from the palms of their hands without facing any real consequences.

what if the fact that you werent phased by it had her calling you overseas immediately and apologized and told you you mean more than everything to her and she was an idiot for playing that game, and she is disappointed in herself for taking it that low.

I say problem solved, her brain finally connected the dots that she may have done something stupid. I wouldn't worry about it unless she pulls this or a similar stunt again.

 

[slickaz]

"shes slightly immature as in new to relationships. so she doesnt know what to do sometimes. and being 20, still acts like a 14 yr old sometimes."

I'll tell you because you guys do not want to set the frame of how your relationship is going to be for fear that the girl won't agree and then you'll have to start all over again.
.

Thanks man, thats deep and true..appreciate you being honest. and you're right, ive noticed myself with this girl ONLY. i feel sometimes like wow i dont wanna lose her, so i gotta play this right.
but you're right in saying if she acts a fool, drop kick her out.
and from now that is the mind set i will have.

however, my question i guess is a catch 22.
Do you show weakness in being possesive of her and another guys picture?
or
do you man up and tell her off for it and dump her?
which ones worse? is it worth starting an argument over a picture that she put up knowing well that itd annoy me?with a guy friend of hers?

How would you deal with this though? would you call her on it straight away? and leave her to apologize and make up for it?
over all, though i agree with you and thanks for bringing me back in frame with that.

Please also note, im in NO WAY condemning or supporting a 20 yr old acting like a 14 yr old. I stated that so you guys get an idea of what type of girl she is. Ive dated 21 yr olds that act mature like 30 yr old women. but ive dated 25 yr old women that act 12. ive also dated 21 yr old women that act very mature at 21 and turn extremely immature when they hit 24/25. i never get that so women and age is not proportionate to maturity.

As long as they are guy friends (orbitors) whom she never fvcked with then it doesn't make a difference. All women are attention wh0res to some degree.

firstly Thanks for your response DJ, appreciate it..

The reason why i let it go without giving big drama about it is
firstly because she has been good friends with this guy, even though i know he has feelings for her, but she only sees him as a friend, and he has a girlfriend.

I would refrain from conveying any emotional frustrations with her because of a picture

I did refrain from going into too much drama and it seems it worked because she called me straight away.

But yes im going to use both of your advice.
Im going to let this go because, today when i spoke to her, she said again she was very sorry about being that childish. she said she was very disappointed in herself. i didnt show that i was phased by it so i guess shes working extra hard thinking i got something on my mind.

but next time, if anything like this happens, im going to call her out on it and give her the boot. coz honestly, she may be hott! and she may be great cook but she knows full well i got a ton of girls hit on me everytime me and her go out. so she knows i can replace her like meat on a barbie.

Thanks guys..Rep coming

 

[slickaz]

Thanks DonS, Yeh i figured it was seeking attention.
So im gonna go with that and KX and DjDamage advice.

i just wish this was easier, like why cant they think logically like us.
Like if you're trying to get a guy, you dont show a pic of you and another guy.
its just simple logic.lol.

but i guess its the games we have to play to keep the hot ones in it