"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Picking the wrong woman can cost your life

Latinoman

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A clear example of a LOT of things we have touched in here... she is 10 years OLDER than husband. She was (prior to marrying him) divorced and single mother of 3. And she was obviously a slut.

He married her...and lost his life.

http://www.courttv.com/trials/sommer/

also http://www.courttv.com/trials/sommer/012407_ctv.html


Widow convicted of poisoning her Marine husband with arsenic to collect $250K in benefits

I'm going to summary this epic.

In summary, here we have a 33-year-old mother of four (3 from a previous marriage) that poisoned her husband (22-year-old Marine) in 2002. The purpose was to collect $250K in benefits so she could get breast implants and have a more luxurious life.

In this case, his unexpected death was initially ruled cardiac arrhythmia. She donated his tissues and organs to research and his body was cremated. But more than a year later, scientists found elevated levels of arsenic in Todd Sommer's tissues: more than 1,000 times the normal level in his liver and 230 times the acceptable level in his kidneys. She was arrested and charged with his murder in November 2005.

Prosecutors admitted they had no evidence - no purchasing records, electronic paper trail or any direct link to prove that she had access to the arsenic that killed her husband. Instead, they focused on the defendant's seeming inability to live within her means and her promiscuous behavior after her husband's death. Witnesses testified that this woman had breast implant surgery two months after her husband died, partied in Tijuana with girlfriends and entered wet T-shirt and thong contests. Calling the defendant's former lovers to the stand to describe her abundant sex life, was another piece of the puzzle that the jury needed - evidence of her inappropriate grieving - to help them reach a guilty verdict.

Her three youngest children, including the son she shared with the dead husband, currently live with the defendant's brother in Michigan.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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penkitten

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jesus latinoman! just cause shes a nutbag doesnt mean all older women with children would do that to a new husband.
this woman is really a total nut.
how could she do that?
 

Latinoman

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penkitten said:
jesus latinoman! just cause shes a nutbag doesnt mean all older women with children would do that to a new husband.
this woman is really a total nut.
how could she do that?
Well...she was

1- a "reformed" slut

2- a money hungry

3- WAY older

4- with a divorce

5- and 3 other children

and he was a Marine which equals "benefits". Most of which are typically useful once a Military person DIES.

It doesn't take a genius to know that a woman like (ALL the 5 combined) this typically ends up divorcing her husband or wishing he dies in combact.
 

Latinoman

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Of course...the above is an extreme.

My point is...NOTHING good can come from a relationship with a woman that was described (all 5 points). Well, maybe the ONLY good thing is the inocent child.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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penkitten

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latinoman, she wasnt a reformed slut at all. she got breast implants and went to party in tijuana with the wet t shirt and thong contests and having sexual encounters right after he died.
 

Latinoman

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penkitten said:
latinoman, she wasnt a reformed slut at all. she got breast implants and went to party in tijuana with the wet t shirt and thong contests and having sexual encounters right after he died.
Hmmmmm...what do you want to BET that she was slutting around prior to marrying him?

No woman goes from being "pure" into going to Tijuana and do the wet t-shirt & thong contests and having LOT of sexual encounters (including 3-somes) in a matter of weeks.

This woman has been opening her legs for YEARS.
 

DJDamage

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Latinoman said:
This woman has been opening her legs for YEARS.
That explains the 3 illegitimate children :D

One has to wonder why would this 22 year old would marry a woman older them him by 10 years with so much baggage. My guess is that he made the mistake most men make when they marry a woman: They let their women's bad behviour slide in favour of sex.

Sex should not be an exchange for her bad behviour, other wise your woman will relise this and eventually black mail you with it. She probably should have been cut loose a long time ago.
 

kyphan

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Latinoman, I think you and penkitten mean the same thing and are stating it differently.

This example is definitely the exception, and by breaking it down we can see a few key frightening personality traits that one may find in a divorced woman. Those that need a real daddy to raise their kids are going to do everything they can to find that man, and that's why we should be very careful with these women. Not that most would kill their husband; it's that they want someone to help them out in their situation and will do a lot to get that support.
 

Latinoman

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penkitten said:
latinoman, she wasnt a reformed slut at all. she got breast implants and went to party in tijuana with the wet t shirt and thong contests and having sexual encounters right after he died.
Psychologist J. Buzz Von Ornsteiner on the Cynthia Sommer murder trial.

QUESTION: Every one handles grief differently!

J. BUZZ VON ORNSTEINER : How individuals experience grief is unique and highly personal. There can be a broad range of feeling and behaviors that can be experienced after the death of a loved one. Most of us see grief as feeling of sadness, depression, anger, guilt, anxiety, loneliness, helplessness and fatigue. Certainly people can have different ways of dealing with death, some people self-isolate, and it is possible that they could conduct themselves in the opposite way, spending money foolishly, having cosmetic surgery and acting out sexually (going to bars, nightclubs, quick sexual interactions). However, these behaviors aren't NEW for the defendant Cynthia Sommer; these are all of her old behaviors before her husband's death. This doesn't appear to be related to grief but rather a woman who in her mind has been liberated from the chains of a relationship that set too many limits on her. Psychologically to the jury, she may appear at the least self-absorbed. However, I think it will be a very "hard sell" to the jury that she is a murderess!


QUESTION : What about the fact that she readily signed to have his organs donated. Do you think that's significant one way or the other?

J. BUZZ VON ORNSTEINER: Hey! Another great question! I now have one for you: psychologically, what would have happened if she said, "Oh no, I'm not going to sign." What would have been the reaction? How would her husband's family have reacted to that? Now remember her husband's family were giving their son a lot of money. I think they would have had more questions early on based on her not signing the organ donation coupled with her out of control spending. Her behaviors all along were, I am sure, a financial and emotional burden to them. After all, their son was rather young, when they married, he was 20, she was 30, she was really much older. With that stated, her husband was attempting to set limits with her and clearly she was not going to compromise. This was a woman who has a history of poor judgment. She appears to lack insight into the failure of her first marriage and the negative consequences of her spending to make the necessary behavioral changes to prevent a repetition of the past. I would think her husband's parents were aware of the troubles in their son's marriage.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Latinoman

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This is what I has been preaching all along.

When you COMBINE

1- Slutty past

2- A woman that is considerably older (in this case, she was 30 when he was 20 and both married)

3- A divorced woman

4- With three children (from other man)

5- And issues with $$$ (overspending)

You are truly in VERY serious trouble.

I feel sorry for her children. Note: She was also accused of child neglect prior to this guy's death.
 

penkitten

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Latinoman said:
Hmmmmm...what do you want to BET that she was slutting around prior to marrying him?

No woman goes from being "pure" into going to Tijuana and do the wet t-shirt & thong contests and having LOT of sexual encounters (including 3-somes) in a matter of weeks.

This woman has been opening her legs for YEARS.
it looks like she never stopped slutting around which is why i said she was never reformed.
like an alcoholic saying he doesnt drink anymore while sipping on wine.
 

Latinoman

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penkitten said:
interesting.... where did you find that at

http://www.nctimes.com/articles/2005/12/15/news/sandiego/19_33_0512_14_05.txt


Read the last parragraph (also see #3: below).

Also, particular attention to the following excerpts:

1: "A credit check showed she had more than $23,000 in debt, Navy investigators found.

But that changed with Todd Sommer's death, which left his widow a $250,000 lump-sum payment from his servicemember's life insurance policy as well as a $6,000 death gratuity, according to Terwilliger. She also was entitled to receive $1,871 a month from the Department of Veterans Affairs."


2: "Two weeks before her husband's death, Cynthia Sommer paid $16.95 for an Internet dating service that "focused on sexual discovery through adult personal ads.""


3:"During an 2001 investigation of child neglect-abuse, she told a North Carolina caseworker, "I have four kids. It isn't like I could leave them and go anywhere. No one wants to baby-sit four kids.""
 

penkitten

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werent they together in 2001 and the 4th kid his?
if so, im sure she was reported for the neglect or abuse because he was in service and not there but who reported her?
was it him?
were there previous things going on that they arent telling in the story?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Latinoman

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penkitten said:
werent they together in 2001 and the 4th kid his?
if so, im sure she was reported for the neglect or abuse because he was in service and not there but who reported her?
was it him?
were there previous things going on that they arent telling in the story?
I don't know who reported the neglect. I'm not too sure she was with him nor if she had that child yet. He was 23 when he died in 2005...so in 2001, he should have been 19. I believe he married her when he was 20. So, I'm not sure. Unless she had his kid (or got pregnant) prior to marrying him.

Hard to tell as I would be speculating.
 

penkitten

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from what i read the 3 older kids are not his but he helped raise them as his and that the 4th kid was his.

here is how i imagine it happened :
she told everyone he was so strict.

he told everyone he did not believe in drinking and partying all the time and would then tell them his beliefs in god.

she was always a freak partier, so when he was gone, you know she was drinking and throwing parties.

so he found out and got upset and got tired of telling her to stop so he called and reported her.

when the caseworker for cps/dhr shows up.... this woman says "yes i threw a party because i can not leave them alone and go out and no one wants to babysit four kids."
 

Latinoman

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penkitten said:
from what i read the 3 older kids are not his but he helped raise them as his and that the 4th kid was his.

here is how i imagine it happened :
she told everyone he was so strict.

he told everyone he did not believe in drinking and partying all the time and would then tell them his beliefs in god.

she was always a freak partier, so when he was gone, you know she was drinking and throwing parties.

so he found out and got upset and got tired of telling her to stop so he called and reported her.

when the caseworker for cps/dhr shows up.... this woman says "yes i threw a party because i can not leave them alone and go out and no one wants to babysit four kids."

Just read that she was accused of a felony in Florida for child neglect (4 kids) in 2003. The little kids were alone at 10 PM (she was partying)...with ants running all over the place and the only food in the house were condiments and beer. Bottles of beers within the reach of the children too. And urine smell in their beds.

When the prosecutor tried to bring that up, the Judge did not allow him as it was considered "irrelevant" in the murder case.

Her husband died in February 2002. He could have not called the authorities for the Florida case.

Anyway, I think the husband was naive.
 

penkitten

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Latinoman said:
Just read that she was accused of a felony in Florida for child neglect (4 kids) in 2003. The little kids were alone at 10 PM (she was partying)...with ants running all over the place and the only food in the house were condiments and beer. Bottles of beers within the reach of the children too. And urine smell in their beds.

When the prosecutor tried to bring that up, the Judge did not allow him as it was considered "irrelevant" in the murder case.

Her husband died in February 2002. He could have not called the authorities for the Florida case.

Anyway, I think the husband was naive.
if he was away when the florida incident happened, then he either never found out about it, or she lied to him about it since the kids were never actually taken away. doesnt really sound naive on his part if he never had the facts to make his mind up.
 

Hitman10000

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The guy deserved it, if you can't tell a manipulative h0 a mile away it's your prob but the good thing out of this is that the rest of us guys can live and learn from it.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

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