Phone questions...

[Demodulate]

I had my 1st lunch date with a younger woman yesterday, went well...

After I dropped her off I said I would call her later.. A few hours go by and she calls me, She was at a resteraunt with her friend. I was busy so I cut her short and tell her I will call her later. end up calling her later that night, she doesnt answer, leave a message. She calls right back. Said I had a good time, usual Banter, she tells me to call her tomorrow...

While at lunch she told me she left her previous BF because he was clingy... called her multiple times in the day to talk.. this girl goes to night class 4 nights a week, works a 8:30-4:30 job mon - fri and a weekend either sat or sat and sunday on alternating weeks. She works alot and doesnt have much of a life.. the ex was clingy, and always up in her ****... so she got bored of him. she wanted to go out with the girls and he was always following her around like a puppy...

I dont really see a need to call her today, I know shes going to be busy all week, nothing new has really happend to talk about, and I dont know when I will be free to take her out again. I have said everything I needed to say about the previous date

Do I just call because she asked me to? I am not good at Idle Chit Chat... and I dont really se a reason to call other then she asked me to. but do I do it to be curtious? I really dont want or need to...

 

[earthshyne]

You: Hi, it's demodulate. How are things today?

Her: Good, how about you?

You: Pretty good - blah blah blah... what's new with you?

Her: Oh, you know, same old same old blah blah blah...

You: Yea, don't I know it! Well, you asked me to call and here I am! Anything specific you'd like to chat about?

Her: No, not really. Just wanted to say hi.

You: That's cool. It's good to talk to you too. But I really don't have any news.

Her: Neither do I. Just wanted to chat with you again.

You: Well, I remember you told me about your ex being all clingy and stuff, and that's not my style at all. I'd like to call you once a week, if that's ok. Don't want to interrupt your life, because I know how busy you are...

-----------------

Obviously, it needs to be tailored to fit your personality styles, but I think you get the idea.

 

[Demodulate]

well my courtesy call turned into a 30 minute conversation...

I told her I was getting of the phone, and she said she would call me tomorrow...

her last BF was to clingy and called her to much but all she want to do is talk to me....


atleast we had a good conversation...

 

[PeeGee]

Call when you have something to say or ask (like whether she wants to go out). I find that when I call with no intention in mind the conversation is dull.

Also get/use a cellphone with limited minutes. Forces you to keep conversations succinct.

 

[Demodulate]

im not going to let a cell phone dictate how long I can talk to someone...

Ill end the conversation when im ready...

anywho...

Im not one for talking on the phone, but I can with this girl... strange...

 

[Demodulate]

ok...

I call her monday and say Ill talk to her later in the week, she calls me the next day, before getting off the phone she tells me to call her tomorrow..

same position as before...

I told her id talk to her later yet she wants to talk everyday..

do I just not call for a day or two.. obviously she doesnt get the I will call you later in the week routine..

 

[Flea]

Next time she says "Call me tomorrow" make a joke of it -- say, "Hey, I don't want to be a stalker like your old boyfriend, I'll call you back later in the week."

In other words, take control of the situation - don't let her dictate the terms.

Originally posted by Demodulate
ok...

I call her monday and say Ill talk to her later in the week, she calls me the next day, before getting off the phone she tells me to call her tomorrow..

same position as before...

I told her id talk to her later yet she wants to talk everyday..

do I just not call for a day or two.. obviously she doesnt get the I will call you later in the week routine..

 

[icehot]

dude,

don't make a rookie mistake like falling into the "phone trap".

Women are master talkers and will keep you yapping as long as they can. If you're calling her just because she told ya to, then
you're loosing major challenge points.


Remember, the main purpose of the phone is for setting up dates.

-iceH

 

[OpenMind]

Why don't you save all the chit chat for the date. Don't call her unless you plan on asking her out....