"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Phone convo: tips??

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DJ4Life

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This HB8 im trying to hook up with asked me in MSN if i wanted to chat later in the night she will call me, i said ya sure.

The thing is im just not too experienced with phone convo, im way better off chatting on msn or even meeting up close and personal, but phone is just strange since you can't really see the other guy's emotions and you can only hear her voice

any adivce and tips for how to start the convo, keeping it light and interesting and when to end it?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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08aisaac

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Well, there is an article that says you should be less interested in her than she is in you. So you don't need to try and keep the convo going, she does. This means you should show some value, use some sort of routine, and let her keep it up.

MSN sucks for talking to girls, I know from past experiences.
 
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Alfie Crew

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Originally posted by 08aisaac
Well, there is an article that says you should be less interested in her than she is in you. So you don't need to try and keep the convo going, she does. This means you should show some value, use some sort of routine, and let her keep it up.

MSN sucks for talking to girls, I know from past experiences.
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I disagree, if you just sit and wait for her to take action, that won't get you anywhere. A lame person to talk with = even lamer in person. Keep it simple be yourself.
 
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08aisaac

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being more interested in a girl than she is in you means she's in control of the relationship. Plus, I'm thinking you would be at a high enough game, that one girl doesn't mean that much. She need to earn you're time.

Maybe I said it wrong before. lol.
 
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ICaughtFire

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i just wonder what we should be talking about, how to keep the flow going etc, any more advice guys?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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smoove

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hey man, what is the purpose of this phone convo?

If it's to set up a date...keep it short and to the point. A couple jokes, haha, then make plans and peace out. 5 - 10 mins

If it's for her to unload her girly problems on you....don't even answer the phone. Playing therapist usually gets you no where. Next time you talk to her, just tell her you were busy or something, then make plans to chill in person. Keep your eye on ball and focus on what you want to get out the interaction.

If it's just to chat and get a feel for one another keep it very light. Again, a couple jokes, a couple stories....display your DJ personality and then on a high note CUT THE CONVO SHORT...tell her you gotta go and hang up. 10 - 15 mins tops. Next time you guys talk, tell her right at the start that you're busy and you have to go, but that you would love to talk and you can get together with her IN PERSON on this day or that day.

Anymore questions?
 
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Alfie Crew

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Originally posted by 08aisaac
being more interested in a girl than she is in you means she's in control of the relationship. Plus, I'm thinking you would be at a high enough game, that one girl doesn't mean that much. She need to earn you're time.

Maybe I said it wrong before. lol.
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Yeah agree with idea, and mind set. Not trying to impress her is extremely key. I just didn't want to him to just sit back, and wait for her to do things.
 
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Spookey

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smoove said it perfectly
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Snoop

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Whenever im talking to a girl over the phone I play madden and I tell her im playing too. It puts the responsibility of keeping the convo going on her. It also doubles as a filler during the awkward(sp?) moments, if it gets quiet just be like OH YA TOUCHDOWN BABY, GO STEELERS YEA!!! It may sound stupid but it works for me.
 
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Dude2Stud

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Originally posted by DJ4Life


The thing is im just not too experienced with phone convo, im way better off chatting on msn or even meeting up close and personal, but phone is just strange since you can't really see the other guy's emotions and you can only hear her voice
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Aren't you contradicting yourself here?
 
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Damian

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No interaction can beat a physical face-to-face confrontation. If you can, set up a meeting and stick to your strong points. If you can keep a good IM conversation of a strong phone conversation, by all means go ahead, but remember that the goal is always to physically meet. You cannot truly make any steps towards completing attraction without physically meeting.

-Damian
 
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