"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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phone conversations

smoothtalker72

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lately i've been talking on the phone a lot with different girls but i run into the same problem with them all. we carry on conversations well but it slows down at points even to nothing at times. there will just be this awkward silence where i just dont know what to say and i can tell they're on the other end just thinking "i wish he would say something" so i end up reaching for things to talk about.

any tips here would be greatly appreciated. what do you do to break the awkward silence? what are some good long conversation topics for over the phone? im a much better conversationalist in person but on the phone i have some problems.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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surfdog

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make it a 'comfortable silence' instead of awkward silence..do a search see if you can find anything..i remember seeing it somewhere awhile ago when I was young..
 

jeffthechef

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hmm..i would try and avoid talking on the phone to simply talk as much as possible..unless it's urgent or something big then it's ok..

the phone should be used to set up things...if it's a girl you're not interested in go ahead and talk but if you're interested...phone for setting up..giving her too much of your time shows you have too much free time and that she owns you
 

surfdog

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also...

if theres nothing left to say, just tease her, throw in a lil C+F etc.

Otherwise cut it short, say you have to leave and do something and that she should call you later. Shows her that you actually have a life and that she is not a priority (she'll have to work for you)..
 

smoothtalker72

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these are girls i just met recently. im talking with them on the phone to build comfort between us. take last night for example, girl calls me late at night and we chit chat for a few mins then theres a pause and i end up looking for something to say. cant just bail out whenever i have nothing to say. plus i only talk to these girls like once or twice a week on the phone.

but i already do the teasing, thats just natural for me except during the pauses i cant really think of anything to tease them about. im ususally the last one to have said something then its like they are on the other end waiting for me to ask them a question
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Triple T

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When your talking to them and you guys are having a fun time and theres lots of energy...then thats when you bail. Too many guys stay in there too long and the interest dies down.


It'll leave her the impression of you being all that fun and energy.
Which means more interest in you and they will think about you for sometime after you hang up.

Just be like "haha yea. Well anyways I got to go do chores/homework/go out/etc., but I'll talk to you later. Bye!" *click*

Done. She'll be like, "awww....I miss him already. Hes such a fun guy. Everytime I talk on the phone with him its always fun...but its always too short! I want more! MORE!"

They'll go crazy thinking about you and they'll have urges to call you now and then.
Make your calls short. (also gives the impression that your a busy DJ)

Good luck man, remember...get going while the going is good. :cool:
 

smoothtalker72

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why does everyone keep saying that. i use the phone like i use aim, to talk to someone and get to know them a bit. honestly at my age rarely does anyone go out with a complete stranger. regardless, i did not mention my intentions with the phone calls. its just not gonna work out if i try just calling and directly after the hellos ask a stranger out. shes going to want to talk a little bit, you know feel me out see if shes someone she could possibly want to go out with. not only that but i need to talk to her a bit to find out if i even want to go out with her. please dont come into the topic telling me that "phone calls should only be used to make plans". i just wanted advice on breaking awkward silence or preventing it altogether.

plus if she calls, what do you want me to do, say "are you calling to go out with me??" "no" -click-. seriously, does no one believe in a casual conversation anymore? its not like im calling the same girl day in and day out
 
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