"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

People's take on this situation

vorbis

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 18, 2005
Messages
432
Reaction score
2
Location
Boston
First I suppose a small bit about myself. Even though I'm 23, I've have fairly limited success with women. Shyness was a big factor for years, but its getting better. Anyways.

I was out on Friday night in a club. I ended up scoring a 5 (nice face, bit heavy). As we were leaving, I had to get my coat so she went outside to wait. In the queue, this HB7 started chatting me up. Took me a few seconds to realise that she was talking to me. Walked with her out of the nightclub.

The girl I scored was outside chatting to a few guys. The HB7 was showing a high IL so I decided to chance her. Things were going fine, was doing some kino on her neck and her back. I leaned in for a kiss but she lowered her head. Said she had a bf. Normally I would bail at this point. She though didn't move back from me and was still holding my hand.

I figured she was testing me so I started busting her about the bf. She started talking about how great he was and that he was always there for her. At the same time, she had no issue with me continuing the kino on her hair neck and back.

Her choice of language was unusual, she kept using terms like "angel", "dependable" to describe her bf. She even said that he was not much to look at but that she loved him. She called me good looking and an interesting guy.

Kept on chatting to her for about another ten minutes. Have to say she was great to talk too so I wasn't viewing the whole thing as a waste of my time. One of her friends came back then to tell her they had got a taxi. I walked her up to it. She still seemed to be showing high IL. She seemed to be expecting me to ask for her number so I did. She also asked me for my number. Gave her a kiss on the cheek and left.

I am inexperienced with women so this one left me a bit confused. Is she just looking for attention? i.e. a AW
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Docs

Banned
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
3,571
Reaction score
56
Location
Kingston, Can-a-duh
Hello!

Great pickup on words there. That suggests to me that she isn't happy about your boyfriend, considering that she did not push away.

She could be a AW, or it's a shattest, you passed it though, because you didnt' bail.

Excellent job. Persistance

Looking some more, it feels to me you were a little quick on that kiss.... Still, she's a option since you reeled in her number, and her yours, so it doesn't hurt to go after her. I'll leave it to someone else to tell you if and when to call her.

Kudos to you.
Docs
 

Maverick001

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 7, 2004
Messages
324
Reaction score
1
Location
SOL III/Terra
vorbis,

Welcome to the board. A field report as a first post; well done...:up:

If you want to move things along with this girl, of course call her and call within 2 days max.

Then set the rules of engagement by pacing this out as you want. If she`s an AW, no problem. We can help you deal with those.

If she really does have a boyfriend, I would suggest being in the periphery for now. Remember, bros before hoes.

If you haven`t read the DJ Bible, and done the bootcamp, don`t wait.

Cheers,
Mav
 

Bonhomme

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 2, 2002
Messages
3,956
Reaction score
16
Location
Land of the Ruins
(Consulting Pook's ******** translator...)

******** translator sez if a gal is telling you what a guy does for her, she's not under his spell, and thinks of him as a good friend, more than anything else.

If she tells you how he makes her feel, whether good or bad, or some combination thereof, forget her. She's totally under his spell, and treating you like one of her female friends. Girl talk is for girl friends.

From what I can tell, she gave you a bit of both, but more about what he does. Saying she "loves" him is not like saying he "makes her feel alive," or some such. ******** translator indicates she probably wants to jump ship, but doesn't want to hurt the guy, because she likes him as a person. Bummer for him.

But don't worry about him. If the chemistry's not there with her current fellow, it's not there, and she's gonna bail on him anyway. If she handles it with class and decency, it's a good sign, as far as her character goes. Women will very often pick a replacement before they bail on a guy.
 
Top