People walk over me

[TheOnlyOne123]

This has nothing to do with picking up girls, but i figure i'd post it here anyways..


Case in point, i feel like people see me as an easy target for someone to mess with. I'm average height average weight.. But i look young for my age 22.

Example: Tonight at a bar, i go to stand near my friend at a table, and this old guy (estimate 45) does a fake punch to my face and says something.. Then when i sit down, he goes "is it ok if i punch you in the back of your head".. Now clearly he's trying to get a laugh from his posse, and i know he's not going to do anything. But it annoys me nonetheless. Still I take it.. and he eventually asks me some dumb ****, i.e "Are you from Boston".. Just to try to be a wise guy.. He ends the convo by saying, "I'm just messing with you, ill only kill you once"..

Another case in point.. I walk into this same bar a few weeks earlier, and some random douche bag says "This kids not 21".. I don't say anything in response and keep walking.. But after a while this stuff starts to irk me. I hate just taking it, but I have no ability to fight physically, and don't want to have to rely on that.

Any thoughts or suggestions. It's not that i'm unassertive, i'm just very bad in quick scenarios like this where people are *******s to me.

 

[Sosa]

You should work on your body language and be mindful of your speech,such as your tone.

 

[Sosa]

If he presents himself as weak, this type of thing will continue to happen. I obviously have no idea of him or this environment that he is frequenting but I should have been more specific- He should start WORKING on his body language, it won't happen over night and thinking about it; he'll probably have to deal with his fair share of this behavior while he is developing his overall prescence which generally is something that people have come to develop with experiences over their lifetime.

 

[DarkLight]

Put it like this... its gonna continue to happen until you DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!

Teachers come in weird shapes. And the lesson you need to learn is coming at you, in the form of these "douche bags."

AKA: your attracting this SH!T! The universe is sending it to you, as a challenge/learning experience... so you can sort your sh!t out. Get some respect for yourself, and that will come through NOT TAKING SOMEONE'S SH!T.

Now I'm not saying swing on the next fool that tries something. But theres no need to just "take it." Why you gonna take it? Why would you want to amass that kind of shameful energy!?

Look the fvcker dead in the eye, and with self-respect and value for yourself, ask him "what the fvck is your problem!?"......(and rightfully so). As a man, the bridge of communication will be full circle now, and you'll have passed the test in the "teacher's" eyes. He'll respect the fact that you earned your grade, and downshift his gear to one of more "cool."

You feel me!?

Now start respecting and valueing yourself... even if theres not much there to value. Seeds only grow when you water them! Now go grow some motherfvckin flowers...... DONJUAN!

And if a bunnybaby does something cute and worthy, might want to consider giving her one. I reccomend the Tiger Lilly! Hahahaa.

Peace Playa'

 

[blinkwatt]

Im going to assume that you are skinny,because stuff like that happened years back when I was really skinny.

Look,you want them to stop? Here is how you do it,there a couple of routes;

When they ask you if they can do something stupid to you,you dont let them!

Random Idiot-"is it ok if i punch you in the back of your head"
You(back straight,strong voice)-"Look buddy I'm here to enjoy myself.You go about your business and I will go about mine."
He should get the point.

random douche bag-"This kids not 21"
You-(Look him in the eye and keep walking.This guys is certainly not worth a moment of your time)

Then there is the weight lifting way to command respect....

I know what I'm talking about,a few years ago I used to be super skinny,5 foot 7 inches 115 pounds. All my friends used to push me around,literally. A few years went by with modest working out habits,and bad eating habits I only hit 125 pounds,with minor muscles.After 9 HARD months in the gym,new eating habit,and new outlook on life...I weight 150 pounds at around 9-10% bf. Now the skinny comments aren't even there anymore. Whenever I go out now with friends,none and I mean none even try to push me around. All I get now is "macho man/buff guy/muscles",compared to "douche/f***er" from friends in the past.

 

[Jariel]

Then there is the weight lifting way to command respect....

I know what I'm talking about,a few years ago I used to be super skinny,5 foot 7 inches 115 pounds. All my friends used to push me around,literally. A few years went by with modest working out habits,and bad eating habits I only hit 125 pounds,with minor muscles.After 9 HARD months in the gym,new eating habit,and new outlook on life...I weight 150 pounds at around 9-10% bf. Now the skinny comments aren't even there anymore. Whenever I go out now with friends,none and I mean none even try to push me around. All I get now is "macho man/buff guy/muscles",compared to "douche/f***er" from friends in the past.

This is how I solved it too.

I used to get walked over the same way, have guys push me around and make me look weak in front of other people. Well, the truth is I WAS weak and that's not really something you can overcome with an attitude adjustment. So I followed Diesel's Bulking Guide (in the health and fitness forum), bought my own weight bench and protein powder, and threw myself into it.

It takes time and dedication, but it was a lot easier to bulk up than I expected. And trust me, I don't get any guys walk over me now. Most guys are intimidated by me. Sometimes if I accidentally walk into someone in a club, they apologise to me. I even had a gang of guys back down from me one night after I stood upto them. Not only does it affect your physical presence, but it gives you a bolder and more masculine mindset!

I get a lot more female attention too.

 

[Freddy1]

This has nothing to do with picking up girls, but i figure i'd post it here anyways..


Case in point, i feel like people see me as an easy target for someone to mess with. I'm average height average weight.. But i look young for my age 22.

Example: Tonight at a bar, i go to stand near my friend at a table, and this old guy (estimate 45) does a fake punch to my face and says something.. Then when i sit down, he goes "is it ok if i punch you in the back of your head".. Now clearly he's trying to get a laugh from his posse, and i know he's not going to do anything. But it annoys me nonetheless. Still I take it.. and he eventually asks me some dumb ****, i.e "Are you from Boston".. Just to try to be a wise guy.. He ends the convo by saying, "I'm just messing with you, ill only kill you once"..

Another case in point.. I walk into this same bar a few weeks earlier, and some random douche bag says "This kids not 21".. I don't say anything in response and keep walking.. But after a while this stuff starts to irk me. I hate just taking it, but I have no ability to fight physically, and don't want to have to rely on that.

Any thoughts or suggestions. It's not that i'm unassertive, i'm just very bad in quick scenarios like this where people are *******s to me.

Check this post of mine out:
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=108817

 

[TheOnlyOne123]

Was a good read.. We seem to have a lot in common Freddy.. I'm not a small guy to be honest.. I do go to the gym, and eat right..

Only thought is my appearance is youthful..

 

[Freddy1]

Hey thanks TheOnlyOne
Yeah I think we have alot in common.
My height is only 5' 7". I do look pretty young as well.
I've have been working out mor recetly over the last month or so. Just to make myself look bigger. I was thinking of taking some Brazilian Jujitsu classes and Muay Thai just to build up my confidence and also deal with this as-holes,

 

[Ojete]

Get into the gym, learn to fight, and don't take **** from these drunk guys if they mess with you 2 times in a row (first one, mad look, second one fight time!!).

 

[Freddy1]

Damn right! I hate bullies.