"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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People think I'm slow.

Viper

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Well, yes, a lot of people think that I'm "retarded" just because I'm in a special program and the fact that I have a slow voice, really doesn't help that. And when I say "slow" voice I mean, "slow" voice, I mean really, if I were to walk up to right now, you'd think I was a regular guy, but then you'd hear my voice and wouldn't be able to resist laughing at how slow and stupid it sounds. A lot of bullies and even people that I consider to be my friends, laugh at me for this and a lot of times, people will have to ask a few times, before they can get the jist of what I'm saying. But nah, I didn't just make this topic to complain about it, firstly I want to know, is there a way that I can improve this "slow", "stupid" sounding voice so that it sounds, well, "normal"? Knowing this will really improve my game. Secondly, how do I "break the ice" with girls and send them the message, "Hah, don't treat me special because my voice is slow. I'm just like every other guy who approaches, maybe even better.".
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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AC/DC

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uh, record yourself and practice a good speech?

take a speech class. I talk too fast.

You've been gone over a week. Anything change?
 

Viper

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AC/DC said:
uh, record yourself and practice a good speech?

take a speech class. I talk too fast.

You've been gone over a week. Anything change?
Not really, I was interviewed on our school's TV channel for this thing called Pride of the Month , got a varsity letter for wrestling, joined the track team(This is my second year), and am attending our school play this evening(In which a lot hot girls are in and a lot of hot girls are going to see), but not much has changed over the week.
 

ethnomethodologist

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Man viper, where do you live?

You wnt pathetic, I can show you me faking pathetic. It truly is pathetic, draws apathy out of people.

You just freaking misbehavin dude. You looking for people to pet you and say it'll be okay, awww, pwaaa, oh littow baby, your going to be a big boy someday.

Why not just SPEAK UP! TALK LOUDER! GET EXCITED!

Ignore everything I said above if it's not true, it was teasing, meant to get you pissed, so you would answer my question.

Has anybody ever smiled when you said something?
 

Docs

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My ears yet again burn! Viper, snap out of this.

Follow AC/DC's advice, read up on all of the useful replies to every post you made, leave the board for a week or two and come back to us with a post about how you smoked and roasted some AMOG and got the girl's digits.

Cheers BTW! PM me your problems there bud.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Viper

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ethnomethodologist said:
Man viper, where do you live?

You wnt pathetic, I can show you me faking pathetic. It truly is pathetic, draws apathy out of people.

You just freaking misbehavin dude. You looking for people to pet you and say it'll be okay, awww, pwaaa, oh littow baby, your going to be a big boy someday.

Why not just SPEAK UP! TALK LOUDER! GET EXCITED!

Ignore everything I said above if it's not true, it was teasing, meant to get you pissed, so you would answer my question.

Has anybody ever smiled when you said something?
Why does it matter? And yes, they have(A lot of the stuff you said was untrue, but hey, you said ignore everything above if it's not true).
 

ethnomethodologist

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It matters if people understand you or not. It's not whether or not you sound slow.

I really think you are just a troll. Thought so for a long time, I'd rather not point fingers at anything specific though. I know the power of ripping someones beliefs apart. So let's just keep playing along with your excuses.

What you have to do is start practicing. Really practice. REALLY REALLY REALLY practice. You can speak, and type, walk, run, laugh, all the natural things people can do... I know that from the way you type, it's just a given that you weren't submitted to some horrible accident that left you crippled in some way or another. So your better off than a lot of the people out there.

You are a lucky person, you have parents who raise you. You have the option to walk away from bad situations. You aren't surrounded by people's pain everywhere you go.

YOU CAN CHANGE! You just have to push yourself.

You obviously know there is an answer to your question. I hope you don't continue to shuck off all the advice people have given you over the last year.

Here's a little throw back, to the first time I heard you complain about this very subject. http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=82334

I know that you are one of those people... yeah, THOSE people. The ones who need direct encouragement, if they aren't talking directly to you, you assume they are ignoring you. In what context? You can't go over people's old posts and learn from them. There are bunches of people who are insecure about their voices. There are people that are worried about better attitudes. There are people that are worried about approaching, masturbating, their looks, their hair, their smell... ad naseum.

You can go over these posts, and read and read and read, but they aren't going to make you practice anything. You seem to not even enjoy the attention.

I have no idea what makes you smile. It seems as though you never do. I go over your old posts, and most of them you speak so negatively. It's as though you ENJOY failing.
 

Viper

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Did you guys even read the second part of my question and no, if I really did know this, then I would have better things to do then go to forums asking for advice.
 

MrS

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Eyes, not ears, burn. This is internets!
 

Docs

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My ears are connected to my brain, that are connected to the eyes that smoke from such nonsense.
The brain cooks inside of my little head, and because of poor old Viper, I became deaf. >.<

Why does Viper never listen to AC/DC!? (haha, listen >.<!)
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Viper

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Docs said:
My ears are connected to my brain, that are connected to the eyes that smoke from such nonsense.
The brain cooks inside of my little head, and because of poor old Viper, I became deaf. >.<

Why does Viper never listen to AC/DC!? (haha, listen >.<!)
I listen to him there's just not much I can actually do with his advice. Firstly, you can't just go up to the office, ask them for a speech class and have them give it to you, it's not that easy. So nah, I can't take a speech class because I'm already doing drama.
 

ethnomethodologist

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Viper said:
Did you guys even read the second part of my question and no, if I really did know this, then I would have better things to do then go to forums asking for advice.

Why... because all of your posts sound the same and we do, just as you should... We don't care long enough to read to the 'second part' of your question. If you wanted us to, you should have pressed the [ENTER] button.

how do I "break the ice" with girls and send them the message, "Hah, don't treat me special because my voice is slow. I'm just like every other guy who approaches, maybe even better."
What you want to do in this case. Is stop caring so much. Your voice isn't that bad, if it is, than you are forcing it, to make yourself more miserable.

You DO KNOW better than to be asking this question. If you didn't you wouldn't be asking us, because we've already told you before.
 

Docs

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Viper said:
I listen to him there's just not much I can actually do with his advice. Firstly, you can't just go up to the office, ask them for a speech class and have them give it to you, it's not that easy. So nah, I can't take a speech class because I'm already doing drama.
Haha! Whoever said anything about school here? Speech lessons aren't restricted to the local High School. Wake up and take a walk!

But, you're taking drama, that's good. USE IT, get your lines, grab a girl and practice. Tell her to grade your acting, tell her to keep a list of how you've improved, do something other then b**** and complain about the non-existance of a speech class, nothing hurts you more then excuses of poor quality.

Yes? :)
 

Viper

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Docs said:
Haha! Whoever said anything about school here? Speech lessons aren't restricted to the local High School. Wake up and take a walk!

But, you're taking drama, that's good. USE IT, get your lines, grab a girl and practice. Tell her to grade your acting, tell her to keep a list of how you've improved, do something other then b**** and complain about the non-existance of a speech class, nothing hurts you more then excuses of poor quality.

Yes? :)
That's pretty much true. The thing is, that I have no idea where I would take speech lessons AWAY from school and don't know if I would have time, with track and all.
 

Flabbergasped?

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Viper is still going strong.

Viper, here's the best solution. Go to a speech teacher. Tell him your voice is too slow. If he agrees, ask him how to fix it. When he gives you an asnwer, follow up.

It's that easy, and yes, you CAN just go into the office and ask for membership, since most speech teams in the country have too few members. And if you can't, do the above.

I think you're just lazy and a troll. No one could be having problems for over a year and not see any change unless they're a troll.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Viper

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Flabbergasped? said:
Viper is still going strong.

Viper, here's the best solution. Go to a speech teacher. Tell him your voice is too slow. If he agrees, ask him how to fix it. When he gives you an asnwer, follow up.

It's that easy, and yes, you CAN just go into the office and ask for membership, since most speech teams in the country have too few members. And if you can't, do the above.

I think you're just lazy and a troll. No one could be having problems for over a year and not see any change unless they're a troll.
Are you seriously calling me ****ing lazy? I go to track practice every weekday which is a lot of work, so don't ****ing call me lazy *****. Stop talking about sh*t you know nothing about. When you start running 8 laps, doing tough running drills and tough workouts, EVERY ****ING DAY, you can talk.
 

hardrockfan

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well, one solution to your problem is go to a public library and rent some videos on proper speech - might be titled speech therapy. You could possibly download something like that off of the internet. or use your "situation" with your voice to your advantage - become more observant than talkative and you will project a "mystery" upon the women. and women love mystery. You could also go into your bathroom at your house and practice talking to yourself in a mirror - practice does make perfect. just think and then speak. if you have problems with speed, act as though you delibrately think of every word you are going to say - women will most likely think you are more intelligent if you act that way.
 

Flabbergasped?

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Viper said:
Are you seriously calling me ****ing lazy? I go to track practice every weekday which is a lot of work, so don't ****ing call me lazy *****. Stop talking about sh*t you know nothing about. When you start running 8 laps, doing tough running drills and tough workouts, EVERY ****ING DAY, you can talk.
I run a mile in 5 min, I do debate, and I still have time to DJ. YOu have absolutely no excuse for this "slow speech" of yours, because it's been around for over HALF A YEAR now. Are you telling me you couldn't record yourself and adjust your rate of speech accordingly in these 6 months? You couldn't talk to a speech coach in these 6 months? Or are you just full of shyt?

And 8 laps is nothing, 2 miles is child's play for a Varsity Track runner. Keep at it though, you get better with time.
 

Viper

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Flabbergasped? said:
I run a mile in 5 min, I do debate, and I still have time to DJ. YOu have absolutely no excuse for this "slow speech" of yours, because it's been around for over HALF A YEAR now. Are you telling me you couldn't record yourself and adjust your rate of speech accordingly in these 6 months? You couldn't talk to a speech coach in these 6 months? Or are you just full of shyt?

And 8 laps is nothing, 2 miles is child's play for a Varsity Track runner. Keep at it though, you get better with time.
Are you kidding me? 8 laps is simply the WARM UP and I don't recall saying that it was hard. And no it's NOT that easy, especially when you have a voice like mine. Seriously, if I recorded my voice and posted it here, you'd think I was some f*cking retarded kid. It's not that my voice is soft or anything, it just sounds slow and stupid. And still, no one's answered my second question, that does actually have to do with DJing.
 

Docs

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Viper said:
Seriously, if I recorded my voice and posted it here, you'd think I was some f*cking retarded kid. It's not that my voice is soft or anything, it just sounds slow and stupid.
Might actually have solved your first problem
And still, no one's answered my second question, that does actually have to do with DJing.
1. Stop exploding on people.
2. Record and show us your voice.
3. Try to 'break the ice', if fat people can pick up, so can you!
4. You 'ALWAYS' have time. Check the yellow pages and make a few dirt-cheap calls.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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