"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Pedestal?

5string

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 18, 2010
Messages
2,348
Reaction score
116
Location
Standing At The Crossroads
Just want your take on this.

When ol' 5string married Mrs.5string, we settled on plain white gold wedding bands. Fine with me, and it was actually her choice. I had not given her an engagement ring. As far as material things are concerned, we pretty much have it all. I asked her if someone were to say something about such a plain band, how would she respond. She simply said, "I'll show them my house" which is very nice by the way.

Anyway, I took her out yesterday to take care of some things, and ended up buying her a beautiful enagement ring, the one she never had. Mrs.5string was thrilled. She even called me this morning and told me how much she loved it and that she didn't need it, could not believe I bought it for her, blah blah.

So do you think I put her on a pedestal? Would you have done this? I suppose to an extent, I did put her on a pedestal, but can you not do that to a degree when you are married? I mean she waits on me constantly, the sex and companionship are great and I still run the show and lead the household.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

5string

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 18, 2010
Messages
2,348
Reaction score
116
Location
Standing At The Crossroads
Hey thanks Danger.

You know, I have always been one that does things when the mood strikes me, and it did yesterday. I could have waited until Xmas but that's not my style. So, I guess I did do it on my own terms. It was much more of a "moment" as she had no idea what was to about to happen.

Priceless.
 

Atom Smasher

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 22, 2008
Messages
8,654
Reaction score
6,611
Age
69
Location
The 7th Dimension
I don't think doing something like that is putting her on a pedastal at all. Do you feel like it was "transactional" in nature?

Nothing wrong with doing great things for a women out of the blue, but my hard and fast rule is that it should be connected with good behavior on her part, as a means of anchoring.

Sounds like you're trackin' pretty good, my man.
 

Groupie

New Member
Joined
Nov 22, 2011
Messages
6
Reaction score
0
Location
USA
Hi.... I am new one out here...Just joined the forum and opened up this thread.... I want to know that what discussion is being done out here... And what are we supposed to post in here... I shall be grateful on your assistance... Looking forward for positive response and Thanking in advance!!
 

backbreaker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 24, 2002
Messages
11,546
Reaction score
572
Location
monrovia, CA
the issue with "putting women on a pedestal" is not so much doing **** for a woman, it's in the nature that it's done in, i.e doing things in the expectation/hope getting something (a relationship, happiness, sex) in return.

you did not do this, you REWARDED your wife with something she wanted. there is nothing wrong with that.

lol, my wife is spoiled ****less. but she is so because she's a good wife. I like doing nice things for my wife becuase she does nice things for me and provides me with what i want/need and then some. I'm not doing so out of some hope that if i do x or y for her i'm going to get laid or i'm going to keep her happy.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

5string

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 18, 2010
Messages
2,348
Reaction score
116
Location
Standing At The Crossroads
backbreaker said:
the issue with "putting women on a pedestal" is not so much doing **** for a woman, it's in the nature that it's done in, i.e doing things in the expectation/hope getting something (a relationship, happiness, sex) in return.

you did not do this, you REWARDED your wife with something she wanted. there is nothing wrong with that.

lol, my wife is spoiled ****less. but she is so because she's a good wife. I like doing nice things for my wife becuase she does nice things for me and provides me with what i want/need and then some. I'm not doing so out of some hope that if i do x or y for her i'm going to get laid or i'm going to keep her happy.
That's great! Sounds like you have one fine marriage brother. Mrs.5string is still all giddy about her engagement ring, even this AM. She had said she really didnt care about it until I gave it to her. Then she told me how much it truly meant to her once it was on her finger. She's been showing it off to her GF's. Heck, she deserved it. When I think about it, I have been the one who's had my tight a$$ perched on a pedestal. Love it.
 
Top