"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Part 2 Of My situation

S.Y.L

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 4, 2008
Messages
463
Reaction score
3
You may have seen my first thread, heres an update.

Theres this girl I like, and as of recentley, shes been talking to me a lot more than she used to. I've tried to be more interesting and less boring and its seemed to have gotten her attention I guess. Although she might like me as nothing more then a friend

Now though, theres another guy in the picture though. He is also my friend...
She has hung out with him a few times this week, and talk and stuff. But a few weeks ago she said that he was a total creep to me and her best friend. He is also the stupidest person ever, and is a complete jackass (one time he allowed a kid to kick him in the balls for $5)

My best friend says, even if those 2 go out, it wont last long at all, because she doesn't really know him at all, and the longest hes had a gf for is 2 weeks. So he said I shouldn't worry about it. Should I?

Now what Can I do to make me look better over him, so they dont go out and she might gain interest in me
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

HandyAndy

Banned
Joined
Aug 18, 2007
Messages
2,127
Reaction score
21
Location
SoCal!
Well if she thinks hes already a creep then her IL towards your friend has most likely went WAY down, not to mention hes stupid and a complete jackass, according to you. Well to me your friend sounds like a retard and I dont think you should have a problem attracting this girl you like, just look for IOIs so you can make sure your not in the friend zone and vice versa
 

S.Y.L

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 4, 2008
Messages
463
Reaction score
3
Yeah, I do talk to her a lot (like at least an hour every day) on msn, and stuff. I know for sure she likes me as a friend at least, not sure as anymore, but I'm trying to get her Interest level up, as she has quite a bit in common as me, shes really nice, has a good sense of humor, and is very pretty.
 

S.Y.L

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 4, 2008
Messages
463
Reaction score
3
Hey do you think an IOI is like, as soon as I sign into MSN, she starts talking to me, or as soon as she does, she starts talking to me as well?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

CapCrunch

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 30, 2008
Messages
17
Reaction score
0
mm msn thing could be a sign but it all depends on what she talks about, do u talk about exiting stuff or her feelings?

plus i think what the other guy may have on you is this care free mindset that shows of confidence (he doesnt give a rats ass)
 

S.Y.L

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 4, 2008
Messages
463
Reaction score
3
CapCrunch said:
mm msn thing could be a sign but it all depends on what she talks about, do u talk about exiting stuff or her feelings?

plus i think what the other guy may have on you is this care free mindset that shows of confidence (he doesnt give a rats ass)
Shes talked about her feelings once, and thats when her grandpa died. We mostly talk about exciting stuff though
 

CapCrunch

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 30, 2008
Messages
17
Reaction score
0
then its ok but i would cut back on the msn and seek real world interaction to build atraction
 

Flyswatter

New Member
Joined
Aug 21, 2008
Messages
1
Reaction score
0
I felt the need to register and comment on this thread. (I read the whole of the other thread too)

I'm in the same situation as you. Honestly, it was like you were recounting MY series of events apart from a few sentences.

IMO, she's not interested.

I still like the girl and it's been AGES. Like seriously, too long. Every time I try to get over her, we start talking again or whatever and I keep liking her. It's become a cycle.

If she's not making an effort to be with you then I don't think she likes you (and you probably deserve better). I'd say ask her out and if she says no then leave it and move on. Don't put yourself in the same position twice. Don't get stuck in a cycle which leads you right back to where you started. It's not worth it

Just my two cents. Good luck.:up:
 

S.Y.L

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 4, 2008
Messages
463
Reaction score
3
She is trying to have time to see me, shes even trying to cancel some stuff to me and my friend, but she had to go to a funeral a few days ago for her grandpa, so shes really upset, but she said this weekend.

Also, she told that guy she might like that I'm annoying, yet she always starts talking to me and stuff, and she told me that hes a creep, yet everyones pretty sure she might like him. Is she just ****ing with our heads, or mabye she likes both of us, yet hasn't made up her mind.

wtf does this mean...
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

smoothtalker72

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 31, 2008
Messages
131
Reaction score
1
looks like shes playing you guys, you in particular. she tells you that she doesnt like the other guy so that you wont think anything of them talking and vice versa. regardless, do you personally think that you should talk to a girl who talks badly about you behind your back?
 

S.Y.L

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 4, 2008
Messages
463
Reaction score
3
smoothtalker72 said:
looks like shes playing you guys, you in particular. she tells you that she doesnt like the other guy so that you wont think anything of them talking and vice versa. regardless, do you personally think that you should talk to a girl who talks badly about you behind your back?
I'm confused. I talked to him *hes sorta my friend* and hes confused too. She did say he was a creep, like about a month ago now. Could she have just changed opinions, and told him I'm annoying just to make sure he stays interested and not think that she likes me too? She ALWAYS starts convos with me like 95% of the time, and always talks for like an hour, if not more, so I doubt she thinks I'm annoying, and I think shes just talking behind my back.

Btw, I talked to her cousin after she invited me into a convo to help convince her cousin the Jonas Brothers are gay lol, she left, so it was only me and her cousin and we talked for like 4 hours. She then added me on Msn.

Should I keep talking to her cousin, she lives on the other side of the country and shes 2 years younger than me, but If I make her cousin like me, she could brag to her, and since she lives a 5 hour plane ride away, we would never go out, but could she convince her cousin that I'm awesome or w/e and this might make the girl I like, like me. Or is this bad and I shouldn't talk to her cousin ???
 

smoothtalker72

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 31, 2008
Messages
131
Reaction score
1
i wasnt saying that she thinks you're annoying. i ment that she tells your friend that you're annoying so that he'll say to himself "oh she doesnt like him so i dont have to worry about him getting her" just like you're thinking that since she called him a creep she isnt/wasnt interested in him yet she continued to talk to him. see how that works? she may very well like you both but shes stringing you both along until she makes up her mind
 

S.Y.L

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 4, 2008
Messages
463
Reaction score
3
smoothtalker72 said:
i wasnt saying that she thinks you're annoying. i ment that she tells your friend that you're annoying so that he'll say to himself "oh she doesnt like him so i dont have to worry about him getting her" just like you're thinking that since she called him a creep she isnt/wasnt interested in him yet she continued to talk to him. see how that works? she may very well like you both but shes stringing you both along until she makes up her mind
Thats what my best friend thinks. So I gotta step it up a bit here.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Cashew

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 2, 2008
Messages
176
Reaction score
5
Make a move. Ask her to hang out with you sometime. If you've read much of the material here you should know how to do this. You can then attempt to escalate from there.

But if she is debating in her mind between you two, YOU can make her decide by being the first to act. Women don't know what they want so just go for it and show her that it is what she wants.
 
Top