Parents want me to get married/have kids

[dk1990S111]

i have told my parents a few times that they shouldn't hold their breath for me getting married. I know it's a sh1t deal for us men. But they have jokingly said $100k to the first kid of theirs to have a boy. Also that whoever has the most kids gets the 5500 sq ft house they are currently building.

My sister and her husband are focused on school for now, and my younger brother got his gf knocked up and ended up getting married after their daughter was born. They have always fought and the most recent one her dad sent her money to stay in a hotel for the night. She says she doesn't want to get pregnant again but after holding a newborn she might be changing her mind.

If I don't get married and have kids my parents view it as I have nobody to pass their assets on to. If finding a good woman wasn't so damn hard then it wouldn't be an issue but I've yet to find a girl that I'd want to marry. I thought I wanted to marry my ex years ago but luckily she helped me dodge that bullet when she met the dbag at the gym that she left me for, only to end up eating off the dollar menu a month later btw

 

[ubercat]

Well if the parents are interfering that hard I'd assume you have some ethnic background. So why not make it easy on yourself and let them organise the whole deal. I'm sure arranged marriages from the old countries can still be had.

Just make sure she's a minimum 10 years younger than you and then use all the tips here to train her up. That's a better deal than most guys get why not. I've seen plenty of stats that arranged marriages work out more often then freestyle.

Faceit most woman's start off as the basic model i.e. walking incubators. And then you have to install all the extras yourself

 

[dk1990S111]

Lol naw I'm white actually

 

[Urbanyst]

After you pass 18, what your parents "want" stops being your problem.

Get married if you want to. Don't get married if you don't want to.

 

[dk1990S111]

After you pass 18, what your parents "want" stops being your problem.

Get married if you want to. Don't get married if you don't want to.

What I'm saying is I'd be much better off getting married and having kids but it's also a huge risk too. As much as I would like to meet someone worth marrying it seems unlikely with the sh1t quality of girls on the market now

 

[Urbanyst]

What I'm saying is I'd be much better off getting married and having kids but it's also a huge risk too. As much as I would like to meet someone worth marrying it seems unlikely with the sh1t quality of girls on the market now

How do you know you would be much better off getting married and having kids? Are you going off of the realities of today or the realities of 1960? Lol

I would LOVE to get married and have kids too.. if this was the 60's, 70's or even 80's. But in 2017? Pfffff... as if.

 

[El Payaso]

Then don't. Do you want to be slaving away at work or your business to feed a dozen mouths or would you rather keep all that money to yourself? Think about it.

 

[thatfeel]

Your parents are holding some McMansion-tier "incentives" over your head to keep a loose grasp on a situation they knew would eventually start to slip from their reach. You should always be in good graces with your family in case you fall on hard times but don't let people control you with promises of wealth and fortune. You won't be able to think clearly or make meaningful decisions that impact your life the most when you're always considering some obscure, out of reach "but just maybe" "promise".

 

[PeasantPlayer]

Firsly, hugely jel you actually have parents with assets to support you and a potential wife and child. My folks don't and it's one of the things which I feel which hinders me having kids....because it is well and truly on me to provide. You have no idea how lucky you are.

Second, I am only seeking potential wives from outside of the west, where divorce is a huge shame for the woman and happy family, or devotion to the family, is the norm. It's dialled in to these women I find.

I would give my right arm to have my parents say "Hey son,here's 100K and a house to have kids".

So you are pretty much a man-child?

 

[BeExcellent]

So what? Quit expecting anything from your parents or family. Their assets belong to them. They hold a certain set of values. They have every right to do whatever they please with their money and their stuff, including distribute things according to which family members values line up with theirs.

This is nothing new. Families have done this forever. Your lifestyle doesn't line up with their values? They are under NO obligation whatsoever to give you a cent. Lots of families give wealth to charities or churches whose values are in line with what they believe rather than children whose lifestyle they do not agree with.

Drop your expectations. That's your problem, not theirs. They want to see their assets benefit future generations. If you are not planning to create future generations they don't have to leave you squat.

They will act in ways that reflect their value system. Get on with your life & assume you'll have little to no inheritance. And don't be bitter or mad. They are being consistent with what they believe.

Build your own wealth & you won't care about theirs. It ain't yours and you are not entitled to a penny.

 

[PeasantPlayer]

I have absolutely no idea what that is supposed to mean.

Man-child, like accepting the fact that your parents can give you something for free, as opposed to earning it by yourself like a man

 

[Bible_Belt]

Given the shortage of humans on the planet at this moment, you indeed deserve shaming for refusing to multiply.

 

[bigneil]

OP needs to get a date first.

Marriage and children are a great goal - for women. Men are about their purpose. When you succeed at your purpose the right women will magically appear.

 

[bigneil]

The American Dream means

1) A man is a slave to his wife (she can take half his stuff and his kids and get paid for life)
2) A man is a slave to his children (deadbeat dad laws will put him in jail if he doesn't feed them)
3) A man is a slave to the bank (property taxes change)
4) A man is a slave to the homeowners association (cut that lawn)
5) A man is a slave to his boss (need to pay the mortgage or you go to jail)
6) A man is a slave to the Federal Reserve (boom and bust cycles like the Dot Com Bubble and Housing Bubble will wipe out anything you make, most of the time)

Snap out of it, men. This is not freedom. It's only a dream for women, it's a nightmare for men. Try to find a really happy looking father with his wife and kids. I've seen about five. In my life.

 

[Poonani Maker]

Try to find a really happy looking father with his wife and kids. I've seen about five. In my life.

Yeah, my cousin, while in the early years, looked fine with his wife (who pursued him/waited for him to finish college in another state). Now? the pictures look a little morose, and he's havin heart trouble (being put to work outside of work to death). She works too so I'd imagine he does a lot of chores even though he makes a bit more in his job.

 

[bigneil]

(Expecting an emotional reaction from the girls who will try to describe marriage as positive).

Yeah, my cousin, while in the early years, looked fine with his wife (who pursued him/waited for him to finish college in another state). Now? the pictures look a little morose, and he's havin heart trouble (being put to work outside of work to death). She works too so I'd imagine he does a lot of chores even though he makes a bit more in his job.

My brother is the exact guy @BeExcellent would have me be, married in a fancy neighborhood with a wife (who is his age) and two kids. She turned him into a Hillary supporter. He disowned my father and I when we supported Trump. My mom tells me how depressed he is.

 

[RangerMIke]

LOL! $100k won't even come close to what a wife and kid will cost you.... especially after the almost certain divorce rape.

Get a legal document and have your parents sign it saying they will be responsible for any cost incurred, including spousal and child support WHEN you get divorced, then see what they do.

 

[bigneil]

LOL! $100k won't even come close to what a wife and kid will cost you.... especially after the almost certain divorce rape.

Get a legal document and have your parents sign it saying the will be responsible for any cost incurred, including spousal and child support WHEN you get divorced, then see what they do.

Indeed, it costs about one million per kid.

It would be one thing if wives would do anything for men and recognize his servitude, but now they won't even appreciate him and will never be satisfied.

The other day, when I saw my favorite girl, she had me by the balls until I threw down the ace and told her I was dating a girl she thought was hotter than her (she tried to call my bluff but I had two photo shoots to show her). I had waited nearly 4 months to see it, but she morphed back into my dream girl. She went right back to biting her lip and looking down in submission. I won a 15 week chess match - a power volley as @sazc correctly described it. The key was showing her social proof that she had a guy who could get other gorgeous women. That would be impossible if I was married to her. A married man loses the very leverage necessary to keep her interested. It gives her all the power and guess what - she doesn't want the power. It destroys sexual polarity.

 

[BeExcellent]

There exist wives who support and deeply appreciate their husbands. I know many such wives.

Just because Neil hasn't experienced it doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Marriage isn't Neil's goal anyway so what does it matter.

Just because Neil's brother is in a marriage of quiet desperation doesn't mean anything. I see great marriages all around me every day between people who are OBVIOUSLY pleased with the marriage and each other. People who I know well & for years.

 

[Von]

There exist wives who support and deeply appreciate their husbands. I know many such wives.

Just because Neil hasn't experienced it doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Marriage isn't Neil's goal anyway so what does it matter.

Just because Neil's brother is in a marriage of quiet desperation doesn't mean anything. I see great marriages all around me every day between people who are OBVIOUSLY pleased with the marriage and each other. People who I know well & for years.

Most succesful and admired man have been in relationship/marriage

But they do it with a Woman! (not à girl)

You should cover your base, it's not because they look happy they are, maybe they have arrangements etc

Who cares about others... focus on you and get in for the right reasons