Over analyzing everything is a WEAKNESS guys

[Moofahsa]

I'm not ranting on the quality of posts here, but a lot of you guys need to get over your insecurities and stop over analyzing everything. Take things for face value in the beginning, if a girl says she had a good time...then she had a good time.

If a girl won't return your texts, stop crying...theres a million other ones and chances are you'll never run into that snob anyway.

If you break it off or get dumped, it sucks...no Juan can say they don't miss at least something about a broad.

I try and think of relationships as a constant learning experience, if I get tired of the woman or find a flaw I can't live with and have to cut it off then I passed. If I get dumped, I failed. Failure sucks, but there is always something to learn with any relationship no matter if it is 1 date or a 5 year LTR.

Sorry for the "mini" rant, I'm just tired of seeing over analyzing peeps crying here on forum.

 

[oakraiderz2]

Preach it

 

[HandyAndy]

Word.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

As soon as guys stop validating themselves through women this will be a non-issue.

 

[romangod]

As soon as guys stop validating themselves through women this will be a non-issue.

Bingo! :rockon:



.

 

[j0n024]

As soon as guys stop validating themselves through women this will be a non-issue.


I dont understand what you mean by this....I might not be super bright but I cant understand what you mean lol. But I do agree with what you are saying though...too bad it will never stop though.

 

[LostAndConfused]

As soon as guys stop validating themselves through women this will be a non-issue.


I dont understand what you mean by this....I might not be super bright but I cant understand what you mean lol. But I do agree with what you are saying though...too bad it will never stop though.

Don't answer this in a post, but think for yourself (i might be wording the question wrong, but you should get the gist of what I'm sayin):

Do you personally feel that you would be more successful as a man if you were able to score hot chicks?

:EDIT:Do you derive happiness from seeing girls interested in you?

Be honest with yourself. Thats what I think he's getting at, but I may be COMPLETELY wrong lmao.

 

[Interceptor]

jon,
what he means is looking for a sense of purpose, identity, acceptance, and approval.and yes, VALIDATION as a Man, as a human being from a Woman.
ie; "I am not worthy, and I am not a Man, unless I have a woman and she tells me that I am. Becasue I am not worth anything, my own opinion of my Self is not worth anything to me."

When you feel you have such low self esteem, low self worth, that you value
sooooooooooooo much how a woman perceives you,"gives" you a sense of worth and value, hope she will 'like' you, and validates that you're Masculine, then you have deep serious issue to deal with.

The more you look for a woman to approve you, and MAKE you feel WORTHY,the LESS chance it will happen.
And the MORE chance she will thiink of you as Un masculine, needy, insecure, and totally NOT SEXY.


In short, the more you need her, the less she will give you. You actually TURN OFF and KILL any ATTRACTION she could have possibly had for you.

 

[j0n024]

Ohhhh I get it thanks guy's...when I started to read this site I thought I was not a man unless women thought I was cool but now I know the truth...YOU are the one that makes you cool, You are the one that should make you happy. Thanks guy's you made me think deep down and enforce the DJ bible's principles in me some more .

 

[The Deacon]

This guy is completely right. I'm dealing with the Hamlet/Laertes dilemma, and thinking about a problem a lot is never going to get the job done.

 

[ExcelNPrevail]

Word is bond.

 

[tsmith2334]

Overanalyzing can definately be a problem, but it's hard not to be overly analytical on a site like this, with all the specific techniques and strategies you're supposed to use

 

[Mad Manic]

As soon as guys stop validating themselves through women this will be a non-issue.

Eventually a guy might not use women as an indicator to his value/worth etc. because they are so weird, illogical and unpredictable and go for fakes, liars and illusionists. But he'll still feel down about not getting girls. Find me one guy who is happy that he gets no girls.

MM

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Eventually a guy might not use women as an indicator to his value/worth etc. because they are so weird, illogical and unpredictable and go for fakes, liars and illusionists. But he'll still feel down about not getting girls. Find me one guy who is happy that he gets no girls.

MM

Apples and oranges. Validation and depression are two completely different things.

 

[j0n024]

But cant Validation lead to depression? In which case apples and oranges turns into cause and effect....

 

[Maxtro]

This thread is covering two distinctly different points.

First off, it's hard to not over-analyze. Using my life as an example, I have never had any real long term exposure to girls. I know next to nothing about them. So in return I have to analyze my interactions with them and find out if I'm going up or down or staying the same. Over-analyzing takes place when there is an emotional attachment to the girl. I think it's completely normal to wonder what the heck is going on with the girls you know.

As for validation from women, it is dangerous but hard to avoid seeking validation from them. Actually I'm not sure if I'm using validation correctly. I want girls to like me, to be attracted to me, to want me. Being without a girl for my whole life has caused me to want those things. I feel that my life won't be complete until there is a girl in it. I don't feel like a proper person being forever single. It isn't natural to be alone.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

But cant Validation lead to depression? In which case apples and oranges turns into cause and effect....

True, but neither is dependant on the other. Both can be caused by other factors and both are independent entities on their own. Still apples and oranges.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

This thread is covering two distinctly different points.

First off, it's hard to not over-analyze. Using my life as an example, I have never had any real long term exposure to girls. I know next to nothing about them. So in return I have to analyze my interactions with them and find out if I'm going up or down or staying the same. Over-analyzing takes place when there is an emotional attachment to the girl. I think it's completely normal to wonder what the heck is going on with the girls you know.

As for validation from women, it is dangerous but hard to avoid seeking validation from them. Actually I'm not sure if I'm using validation correctly. I want girls to like me, to be attracted to me, to want me. Being without a girl for my whole life has caused me to want those things. I feel that my life won't be complete until there is a girl in it. I don't feel like a proper person being forever single. It isn't natural to be alone.

Smooth seas do not make skillful sailors.

 

[Alphamale1821]

Words never spoken so true Op. I was actually thinking that as i was reading some post here. The over analyzing has got to stop guy's. It's seriously pathetic. Not being an ass but you guys will never get better by coming here with every minor mishap or problem.

The best thing to do is learn from it and improve yourself. The main goal for any Don Juan should always be constant improvement for himself. Going into depression slumps isn't helping you. Coming here asking for advice for stupid shiit isn't helping you either. Stop walking on you back legs and learn to walk.

If You know the fundamentals of the game, and have the confidence that's all you need. The rest is a learning experience. Unfortunately many guy's here just can't grasp that.

 

[NSUballer]

When youre young and inexperienced you tend to need a womans approval for certain things. I was like that but eventually matured and grew out of it. You need to find things that make you confident in yourself. It can be anything. For me its my athletic ability and intellect. And recently my looks. Theres nothing that makes you more confident than being able to dominate other men on the gridiron, weightroom, classroom, etc.