Ouduo's Approach Journal

[Ouduo]

Greetings, I am Ouduo. (Its just a pseudonym, don't worry.)

This is my approach journal, where I catalogue the approaches that I do.

I am an old man (26 yrs) with hair and a face, plus all the requisite parts necessary to approach women.

You're welcome to look on, reader, as I fan the flames of my charisma higher and higher into a vortex that will consume everything it touches! Soar with me through the heights, plunge with me through the depths, churn with me through the lumpy bits, of a modern Odyssey of Cold Approaching! Will I find a suitable lady-companion? Will I crash on the rocks of despair and be eaten by Cyclops? Anything can happen, and it probably will!

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Day 1: 24/06/10: Approached 1 chick, acquaintance of a friend - banter for 12+ minutes. 1 approaches.

 

[Ouduo]

only 1 thing

warm up approaches are crucial.

carve this into the side of your head. It is so important. Taking a few months off - you think you are the greatest. You are awesome but after months of not approaching you cant walk up to a 10. The body reacts with fear.

Make approaches normal. Get used to it, make your body do it 50 times, and at that point it doesnt care. Its so hard now because I want to believe I have mastered the skill so I can skip the baby steps - the asking elderly people the time, asking guys for direction, asking women who are not attractive to me for directions... only after you do that a lot can you approach a 10 and pull things off with any degree of finesse. Nervousness sucks, and nervousness is the direct result of your own laziness in trying to save yourself the effort of having to relearn this skill and do all the boring things necessary to relearn it. This is what you think when you approach an ugly girl: You are my key to the 10. You will teach me to be relaxed and to flow properly. I need plain janes to approach before I go in for the mission objectives.

Have to be a student again, learn to be a learner. The finesse and sparkle has to be re-learned each time when you take an extended period of time off.

 

[Ouduo]

goal of each approach

its hella difficult to keep in mind the goal of approaches which you do not want to have romantic outcomes. It is difficult to stay motivated to actually learn the skill. Yet inevitably this will be 99% of approaches when you are doing warmups and just learning.

The goal of each approach is this:

1. engage the person unobtrusively
2. create a warm friendly vibe with some informational question
3. briefly cross the threshold into the personal domain (remark about clothing, what they are doing here, say something about yourself)
4. end on a positive note (energy gained)

Step 3 is where the romantically intended approaches will separate out from the non-romatically intended ones. Step 3 is the hook that gets the convo in gear. Practice transitioning to the personal with everyone, regardless of interest or appropriateness. This is the time to err on the side of being obtrusive, although the skill lies in being unobtrustive, the only way to learn the skill is to actually be obtrusive until you re-learn exactly where that line is and how to sniff it out uniquely in each person. There is no way to behave "appropriately" without it being you guarding yourself, protecting yourself, because all your anti-approaching tendencies are in full bloom and need to be cut down like weeds by practical experience.

This is why "phasing out" "zoning out" and neglecting all those non-romantically intended approaches or even opportunities is murdering your game: you can't be a tortoise and perk up once a month when a 10 walks by. Become engaged, find a way to do it. The ugly girl is key, the ugly girl is the secret path to the castle. The ugly girl will help you get the pretty ones.

In other words, as a beginner, you are not allowed to screen.

 

[Ouduo]

Day 1. 24/06/10 - continued

+6 approaches.

2 directions, 3 informational.
Talked to chick I knew from a class 5 min.
Transitioned to personal with other chic 2 min.

=7 approaches.

 

[Ouduo]

+2 approaches.

foreign chick, hungarian. Talked for way too long, massively boring.
chick in elevator, knew from before, lawyer. Sexy in a professional way, 2 minutes.

=9 approaches