other women during LTR

[MacAvoy]

Do you think it is wrong to socialize with other women when you are involved in a LTR. My LTR is also LD, so I only see her about once a month. I am fully committed to her however, I would rather hang out with female than males.

I currently have a group of male & female friends (lots of couples) that I do group stuff with, but sometimes I want to go to a movie or do something with a female as friends.

I know the whole Harry met Sally thing, and I agree women and men can't really be friends cuz the male always wants to plug the female. I don't deny that on a physical level, I would love to plug my female friends, however I know I won't because my relationship is more important than a mere poke.

So what does everyone else think. Is it wrong or ok to go out socially w/ a member of the opposite sex when you are in a committed relationship?

I know someone is going to say, not to let your g/f go out w/ other guys, but I'm not the jealous type. First off, I trust her, and finally if she wants to fvck around, then I don't care, she isn't worth my time. I just don't want to get into a situation where she says, well your going out w/ her, so I'm gonna go out w/ him in retaliation.

However, we both trust each other so I don't think that is an issue. Opinions?

 

[GirlCrazy]

I'm married, not dead. I was a big flirt before, and nothing's changed. Neither of us are the insecure or jealous type, so it's no problem for her. I hang out with my female friends all the time. Sometimes the wife tags along, sometimes she doesn't.

Sometimes one of my friends will offer sex, but they get turned down. A few of my friends have even approached the wife offering 3 somes. Still trying to talk her into that LOL.

I'm still a womanizer, I just don't fvck 'em, and as long as there's no sex involved, the wife is totally cool with it. She even bought me a T-shirt the other day that says "Be naughty and save Santa the trip", and said to me "Here's a conversation piece for the young women you flirt with".

Some 23 year old dude asked her out yesterday (hello *cough* ring) and I pointed out he has good taste.

So the bottom line in my opinion is that if you're in a relationship where both of you are secure, and you have the level of trust that we have, what's the problem?

 

[MightyMate]

Get other womans. Just b sure not to be cuaght. You need to cheat to stay ijn proper LTR.

 

[MightyMate]

Im not joking. You ****in AFCs. LTR nad not beeing bored with 1 person is not possible without cheat. If You dont understand that You will have lots of hurt in Your life, and prolly You gonna be dumped. If You cheat, You make some pheromons, You are more relaxed, You show more love to Your woman. It all makes her moe happy. Anyways You wont understand. Serious people who are little bit older than You are gonna agree with me. I cant explain it, You have to live wth it.

 

[GirlCrazy]

Originally posted by MightyMate
Im not joking. You ****in AFCs. LTR nad not beeing bored with 1 person is not possible without cheat. If You dont understand that You will have lots of hurt in Your life, and prolly You gonna be dumped. If You cheat, You make some pheromons, You are more relaxed, You show more love to Your woman. It all makes her moe happy. Anyways You wont understand. Serious people who are little bit older than You are gonna agree with me. I cant explain it, You have to live wth it.

So you are saying that the only way to have a fufilling relationship is to cheat? While I don't judge any of my friends who are cheaters, I can't say that they are any happier than myself. In fact, of all my friends that have cheated, most seem miserable because of it, and most are divorced.

In fact most cheaters that I've seen end up losing some of their freinds becuase they expect everyone to cover for them. I'd be a rich man (ok, richer) if I had a dime for every time a friend's wife called my house saying "what, he's not at your house? He said he was staying at your place for the weekend." I won't lie for my friends, but sometime's it's nice to know if I'm somebody's alibi.

So you see, the kind of man that would lie to his woman would lie to his friends, family and co-workers. Once you start lying to everyone, eventually it's a house of cards that comes crumbling down, and you lose the respect of those around you, which hurts all aspects of your life.

If screwing lots of women is your thing, why even be in an LTR?

 

[MightyMate]

MetalFortress - Can You write in 1 more language than Your own as good as i do? If not please shut up You stupid troll.

Originally posted by GirlCrazy
So you are saying that the only way to have a fufilling relationship is to cheat? While I don't judge any of my friends who are cheaters, I can't say that they are any happier than myself. In fact, of all my friends that have cheated, most seem miserable because of it, and most are divorced.

In fact most cheaters that I've seen end up losing some of their freinds becuase they expect everyone to cover for them. I'd be a rich man (ok, richer) if I had a dime for every time a friend's wife called my house saying "what, he's not at your house? He said he was staying at your place for the weekend." I won't lie for my friends, but sometime's it's nice to know if I'm somebody's alibi.

So you see, the kind of man that would lie to his woman would lie to his friends, family and co-workers. Once you start lying to everyone, eventually it's a house of cards that comes crumbling down, and you lose the respect of those around you, which hurts all aspects of your life.

If screwing lots of women is your thing, why even be in an LTR?

Its like with alcohol. You can drink sometimes, but it doeant mean You have to drink all the time. And neverforget a LTR is not only sex.. Your argument would matter only if LTR= sex, but since its not.. I say cheating helps the relatio. I know it sounds unbelivelable, but thats how it is.

 

[wheelin&dealin]

MacAvoy,

If you saw some of the stuff that I've seen, that goes on in Long-Distance LTRs you'd be amazed. I played for a professional sports team(which will remain nameless), and alot of the guys on the team had wifes back home who were pregnant or had young children. These guys would go out to the bars and clubs every road trip and slay some of the sl*tiest broads around. They had absolutely no regrets and would pound anything they could. Is this really wrong though if you haven't seen your LTR in a few months? That's your decision.

 

[MightyMate]

Porca puttana.

 

[The_Next_Big_Thing]

Mightymate

you are a dumba$$ for your advice which is so filled with holes it is not even funny.

Macavoy- as one poster said "I'm in a relationship but not dead" If you want to make female friends, then by all means go make female friends. Just make sure that is all they become is friends. Whenever I make friends is where they go is friends (maybe I am like women but I put them in the friends column like a woman does until much later on. Drives women crazy ).

personally during LDLTR's I will actually encourage my girlfriend to go hang out with whoever she wants (male or female) but they realize that if they overstep the line and start cheating that they are done. Simple as that. I hold myself to the same standards.

If you don't want retaliation don't be a d!ck about it and just say "if you want to go hang out with your male friends go ahead." Thats what I did and I never had any problem with it at all.

The_Next_Big_Thing

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

The only type of man that can't just be friends with a woman is one that can't control himself. So what if he thinks about banging them, all that matters is whether or not he can control his urges.

 

[MightyMate]

The_Next_Big_Thing - You ae a dumbass without knowledge.

Francesco - Stop talkin ****. The man who cant **** a woman is a man who cant control her. Dont tell me this fag bull**** about friendship with HB. If You are meeting a nic chick to be firends with her You must be a fag.

 

[joekerr31]

Originally posted by MightyMate
I say cheating helps the relatio. I know it sounds unbelivelable, but thats how it is.

ya what's wrong with cheating. i mean, its not like you are unknowingly exposing your significant other to sexually transmitted diseases like HIV that could kill them.

oh wait a second, it is.

you are a dumb f*ck.

if its really so good for your relationship then you and your significant other should have an understanding that its ok for you to go out and pork other people now and then and not tell each other. then its not cheating, its an understanding you both have.

but you don't tell her that because you know she'd tell you to go f*ck yourself. so instead you play russian roullette with her life.

oh but wait, i'm sure you've got her safety covered because you wear a condom. riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

chump.

J

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by MightyMate
The_Next_Big_Thing - You ae a dumbass without knowledge.

Francesco - Stop talkin ****. The man who cant **** a woman is a man who cant control her. Dont tell me this fag bull**** about friendship with HB. If You are meeting a nic chick to be firends with her You must be a fag.

Thanks for posting MightyMouth, now we all know why you can't be friends with women; seems like it's because of some sexual orientation complex. Your frustration is readily apparent.

But unlike you, not all of us question our sexuality AND we do have women as friends. Perfect reason to have them (and I'm sure that you haven't experienced this) is that guys that have women hanging out around them attract the attention of additional women more easily. In addition, female wingmen are the bomb in clubs.

More than likely, these concepts go well beyond your comprehention but keep reading through the forum. With time you may overcome your obvious shortcomings.

Sarge on...

 

[Kaine]

"My LTR is also LD, so I only see her about once a month. I am fully committed to her however"

Why are you in long distance relationship? Why are you committed, what's in it for you?


Kaine

 

[ElChoclo]

Some people go on about transmitting diseases but you need to know the limitations of the human mind. It would be interesting to study some Mormons to find out what they know about polygamy.

However, it seems to me that the human mind likes to do a ranking process so that there is always a preferred partner for something. It might not necessarily be for the same things. But that, in my opinion is the real problem of MLTR. Your mind, regardless of what you do, will have a preference for one and to that extent the others are displaced. It all depends on how much you can segregate your thinking.

Some men are capable of living many different lives at the same time as shown by the occasional newspaper story where two "wives" find out about each other when their "husband" dies. But such men are the exception. As Dirty Harry said, "A man's got to know his limitations."