"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Online Sarging

joe bloggs

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I've just signed up with match.com - do I just send out emails to people I like the look of? If so, how should I introduce myself (note: I'm interested in a LTR not a ONS)?

Any advice would be welcome.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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slaog

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Always look at their profiles to get an idea of their personality and never send out emails just because you like the look of them. You can do that but don't let them think that. Read the profile and mention you find something interesting on it.

On your own profile just give the impression that you are confident, funny, have high standards and lots of hobbies etc etc.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Have you searched the forum?
 

yama600rr

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omg dude... what you you think? off course you email the chick that you're attracted to. no.. go and email some fat ugly looking chick, cummon you're gonna go a make a thread over some useless questions that you already know the answer to.
 

AKA FLEX

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When you find one you like, look at her profile and find something in there that you have in common with her and incorporate your opening e-mail around that, whether it's tennis, reading, 1980's music, etc.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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joe bloggs

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Ok, but what sort of tone should I use and how formal should I be? Is it best to play things straight and talk about common interests or to use a really cheesy chat up line?
 

Telos

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I hate to shake up your little pansy party, but for the sake of all things masculine and true around here I'm going to have to step in and lay down "the law". Online sarging has to be one of the most fvcking stupid, misguided phrases ever coined. Ever.

For those of you suave soldiers who know what you are doing with women and happen to hook up with chicks occasionally through MySpace or Facebook as a secondary source, please tuck your tech nine back in your crotch, as this message does not apply to you.

To everyone else, please tell me, would you sit on your ass at home playing street fighter to train for a full-contact UFC cage match? Didn't think so. Lets say you were trying to build a rock solid physique that looks as if it was etched from solid diamond by Zeus himself. Tell me, would your first intuition be to strap on a neon lime speedo, whip out a stair-stepper, and flail little 20 pound aerobic hand weights to Phil Collins? If so, that's fvcking awesome, but you're still an idiot.

"Online Sarging" prepares you for the real world like bingo prepares you for a 5/10 no limit table at the grand victora.

It reminds me of those idiots who join the marines thinking they are ready to charge into Falujia like Rambo after playing counterstrike in their bedroom for three weeks straight. I can just hear the acne riddled arrogance echoing and reverberating through the room right now: "MAN, I'd freaking PWN if I was in Iraq".

No, you gigantic flaming idiot, you'd get your fvcking nuts shot off and probably start screaming for your mother like a frightened girl scout.

Before you leap into a crouching tiger stance and start whipping insults at me like a pagan throwing stones at a Christian, please just take a very short moment to entertain the slight possibility that ONLINE DATING IS FOR F*CKING IDIOTS.

Thank you.
 

joe bloggs

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I disagree, I am twenty-seven, I work with in an enviroment (academia) where 65% of my colleagues are male and those who aren't are fat, ugly and/or feministas. Although my students are about 60% female hooking up with any of them would be a quick route to a pink slip (and probably a lawsuit). Therefore, online dating seems the most logical option for me.

I'm not asking for much help; just some basic pointers about online dating etiquette.

With respect, if you don't think much of online dating then you don't have to take part in this particular thread.
 

slaog

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Telos said:
I hate to shake up your little pansy party, but for the sake of all things masculine and true around here I'm going to have to step in and lay down "the law". Online sarging has to be one of the most fvcking stupid, misguided phrases ever coined. Ever.

For those of you suave soldiers who know what you are doing with women and happen to hook up with chicks occasionally through MySpace or Facebook as a secondary source, please tuck your tech nine back in your crotch, as this message does not apply to you.

To everyone else, please tell me, would you sit on your ass at home playing street fighter to train for a full-contact UFC cage match? Didn't think so. Lets say you were trying to build a rock solid physique that looks as if it was etched from solid diamond by Zeus himself. Tell me, would your first intuition be to strap on a neon lime speedo, whip out a stair-stepper, and flail little 20 pound aerobic hand weights to Phil Collins? If so, that's fvcking awesome, but you're still an idiot.

"Online Sarging" prepares you for the real world like bingo prepares you for a 5/10 no limit table at the grand victora.

It reminds me of those idiots who join the marines thinking they are ready to charge into Falujia like Rambo after playing counterstrike in their bedroom for three weeks straight. I can just hear the acne riddled arrogance echoing and reverberating through the room right now: "MAN, I'd freaking PWN if I was in Iraq".

No, you gigantic flaming idiot, you'd get your fvcking nuts shot off and probably start screaming for your mother like a frightened girl scout.

Before you leap into a crouching tiger stance and start whipping insults at me like a pagan throwing stones at a Christian, please just take a very short moment to entertain the slight possibility that ONLINE DATING IS FOR F*CKING IDIOTS.

Thank you.
It does help actually!

Theres plenty of benefits to online dating. For people who are not good at approaching it helps you get dates and also gets you used to "talking" with women. You may think it's not talking but you still need to think of what to say. It's much a slower form of communication with is good if you're not used to approaching.

Online dating isn't ideal but it has benefits and can be a useful tool. Getting dates is easier for some and it's then the real learning process begins. If you get a nice girl or whatever who cares how you got her!
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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joe bloggs said:
...
With respect, if you don't think much of online dating then you don't have to take part in this particular thread.
Besides, the guys that know what they're doing online aren't complaining.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Huffman

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Just take it as a reminder that online dating should not be a replacement for real sarging, which, of course, it isn't.
 

joe bloggs

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When you are writing a profile should you emphasise or de-emphasise any controversial interests that you have? I'm a successful gambler (I've made a lot of money on NFL betting using computer modelling) - should I put that as in my profile?
 

cedd

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Mr Autobahn

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I actually like using online dating to find women to meet. However, I have extremely high standards and make the women qualify themselves to me... that might be the way to go for you...
 

joe bloggs

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There is admitedly some good stuff in the linked threads but that particular discussion ended up being about particular sites (including an extended discussion about specialist websites). I'm more interested in answers to basic questions as opposed to extended war stories.

What is a realistic emails/replies ratio?

I sent a few emails to a few likely lasses- how long will people who like my profile take to reply?

btw - I'm using Match.com
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

slaog

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joe bloggs said:
There is admitedly some good stuff in the linked threads but that particular discussion ended up being about particular sites (including an extended discussion about specialist websites). I'm more interested in answers to basic questions as opposed to extended war stories.

What is a realistic emails/replies ratio?

I sent a few emails to a few likely lasses- how long will people who like my profile take to reply?

btw - I'm using Match.com
The site are important if you want to know things like emails/replies ratio because it all depends on the type of women you want to attract.
 

L777

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Telos said:
I hate to shake up your little pansy party, but for the sake of all things masculine and true around here I'm going to have to step in and lay down "the law". Online sarging has to be one of the most fvcking stupid, misguided phrases ever coined. Ever.

For those of you suave soldiers who know what you are doing with women and happen to hook up with chicks occasionally through MySpace or Facebook as a secondary source, please tuck your tech nine back in your crotch, as this message does not apply to you.

To everyone else, please tell me, would you sit on your ass at home playing street fighter to train for a full-contact UFC cage match? Didn't think so. Lets say you were trying to build a rock solid physique that looks as if it was etched from solid diamond by Zeus himself. Tell me, would your first intuition be to strap on a neon lime speedo, whip out a stair-stepper, and flail little 20 pound aerobic hand weights to Phil Collins? If so, that's fvcking awesome, but you're still an idiot.

"Online Sarging" prepares you for the real world like bingo prepares you for a 5/10 no limit table at the grand victora.

It reminds me of those idiots who join the marines thinking they are ready to charge into Falujia like Rambo after playing counterstrike in their bedroom for three weeks straight. I can just hear the acne riddled arrogance echoing and reverberating through the room right now: "MAN, I'd freaking PWN if I was in Iraq".

No, you gigantic flaming idiot, you'd get your fvcking nuts shot off and probably start screaming for your mother like a frightened girl scout.

Before you leap into a crouching tiger stance and start whipping insults at me like a pagan throwing stones at a Christian, please just take a very short moment to entertain the slight possibility that ONLINE DATING IS FOR F*CKING IDIOTS.

Thank you.
Nice try but just not funny. Or helpful. Idiot.
 
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All depends on if your pic looks attractive and if you look hot. If you are average looking and just put a mediocre profile there, then you'll probably have a bad time (i.e. sending 50 emails and getting maybe a few responses that flake out, or maybe getting one interest or email once a year if you are lucky).

People on these online sites are too superficial because they have so many guys sending emails that it's entirely the luck of the draw if you get anywhere.

No matter what you write to a lady to start a connection, you have to remember she's daily bombarded with 50+ emails or at least allot of emails if she has a fairly attractive picture and is in demand, and she's probably got 100 emails or more exactly of the same of whatever you can think of. She can probably get 30 dates a day or more if she really took on everyone on there from everyone wanting to go out with her, and when you feel that way while you are getting at best a trickle of response, or worst, no respones, then it could really challenge how strong your inner game is.

Plus you already put yourself in an inferior position by sending an email and all it usually accomplishes is that it boosts her ego on having another letter or number that's shown interest to her. So, you really have to have a solid profile -- attractive pics (preferrably if you are ripped and showing off), if you don't have a good pic, then you have to write a solid profile to compensate for it (but will still get much poorer results). Without a really good profile then you are just a sitting duck there and no matter what you can think of writing by email wont likely be effective.
 

joe bloggs

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Don't want to sound rude to you Mr Skywalker, but from what I've read you haven't had exactly had much success with the Ladies!

Could anyone else give an indication about the email/Reply ratio and the time people take to reply on Match.com?
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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