Online Personals (Merged threads)

Tiandan007

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I've tried meeting women on-line just for kicks, 99% are wack-jobs and the hot ones just want sex if that's all your looking for...

...personally if your a guy seriously doing on-line dating I think your just hiding behind a computer to avoid risking rejection and truly building your DJ skills. But if that's what you like it doesn't make you a bad person. Meet women in person it's much better.
 

Starman

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Oh how true it is..Most of the girls on the internet are psycho , easy lay types, with low self esteem (TRUST ME!)

2nd .. Internet Personal Ads show desperation to those people not using them. If you meet a girl online..she isnt going to think you are desperate..because that would mean she is desperate.

3rd..Internet Personal Ads should be used as an extracarricular dating..something to help double your dates..sex etc..but shouldnt be used alone..because you never get a chance to try your DJing in real life.
 

86

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Originally posted by Starman:

3rd..Internet Personal Ads should be used as an extracarricular dating..something to help double your dates..sex etc..but shouldnt be used alone..because you never get a chance to try your DJing in real life.
yeah I agree, it's just another tool. probably not the one you should reach for first, I might add...
 

Idorus

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About online personals - how do I make things progress...

A girl replied to my message (she had me on her "meet me" list).

I'm trying to not spill my life in a reply and to ask her a few questions.

I'll try to throw in some humor if I can...

But after this first email exchange, when should I judge it to be a good time to ask her for a date?

Right now I'm asking her what she likes so that by when she replies I'd be in a position to ask her for a date and I'll know where to take her out but what if it's too soon and she feels uncomfortable?
 

DJ de Florida

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Get her phone number as soon as possible and set up a date over the phone. Don't waste time in useless e-mail exchanges developing anything.



------------------
****
Don Juan de Florida
 
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Generally I don't think you can stuff up a relationship with a girl by asking her out too soon, though I think you can stuff up your chances with her by waiting too long to ask her out.

Befriending a girl first because you don't have the balls to ask her out then hoping the friendship will develop into a romance doesn't work - believe me I've tried it many times - it just lands you in LJBF land. Wait any longer to ask her out and you'll end up in pen-pal LJBF land.

I've heard it said that girls know within the first three minutes of meeting you wether they'll go out with you or not (It's certainly the case for us guys). I guess you haven't really met her yet but I suspect your photo, description and brief email are enough for her to make up her mind.

Girls lust after us just as much as we do them and they are just as keen to start dating as you are. I don't believe girls need time to get 'comfortable' with the idea of dating you anymore than you do. If she does then you really shouldn't be dating her as her IL is too low.

Arrange a real world date as soon as possible. If she declines she wasn't going to go out with you anyway, either way the sooner you ask her out the better.

(I suspect that she will be a lot less shocked by having someone she has clicked yes to on an - internet find a date site - asking her for a date than you think).
 

Idorus

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Thanks for the comments.

And anyway now that I think of it... if a girl clicked "MEET ME" and she doesn't want to meet me, well she can eat my meat. I'm not gonna waste time with people like that
 

Aiken_Drum

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NEVER meet a girl without a RECENT photo.
A friend went to a date with a girl that looked ok (about a 7) on the pic she sent, but when she met her she was horrible!! The pic was like 3 years old, she was totally ****ed up!!!
 

corruptrelic

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Nice post alpha male. The sooner you get her to meet the better. I ended up talking to a perfect 10 girl for 2 months online and when we finally met she decided "It feels like I've known you all my life already, so lets just be friends." Tell her if she wants to know more about you - to do it in the real world. Why waste 2 months talking to someone who may not even be interested in you? So what if she has your picture or you have her picture.. it's just a picture some people look bad and others look better. I cant believe how many girls have seen my picture online said I was "cute" "handsome" I've heard it all.. thinking I'm the next Tom Cruise I ask them to meet and when we meet "You're not my type" "You're a nice guy, but.." "Lets be friends first" just because someone likes you online doesn't mean they like you offline as well.. out of every 4 girls I meet from the internet who see my picture actually go anywhere, even though they act like online they want something.

It's never too soon.. and if she says she's uncomfortable meeting you - tell her you can't feel chemistry over the internet and that she shoudn't be putting up internet personal ads to meet people then.
 

Ricardo

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The only caveat to this is that what you write is important to make a girl feel comfortable enough to meet you.

If she likes your picture, but you haven't written much it is possible that you haven't broken her resistance in meeting you.

Plus finding out somethings about her arms you with data for the first date.

Ask her plenty of questions (this makes it look like you give a crap and gives you some details about her mental stability)
 

Starman

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I agree to some point.

When you email a girl..by your 2nd or 3rd email..you should be talking to he on the phone.

When on the phone set a date.

Forget this "getting to know you" crap on emails..it makes you appear 1)uninterested 2) a sensitive AFC who is looking for LOve and LTR but wants to make sure he knows the girl before asking for a date 3) Indecisive

I have friends who are internet predators on the net..they Email..Phone..Date and Bag a chick in 3 weeks or less
 

Bungo Pony

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Mindset using Online Dating Services

Online dating services have aroused curiosity for quite some time. However, some people have found it to be the best way to meet women. It takes away the burden of 1 on 1 contact. It eliminates the need to go up to a random girl, and start a conversation with her. It's all been replaced with a computer - something that is comfortable to the single person in question.

As a DJ, we've learned how to go up to a random female we find attractive, start a conversation, and get her digits. After all this, would a DJ want to try online dating services? My opinion, why not? However, we should not see it as a replacement for meeting women in person.

Ever have one of those nights, where you're up at 4:00 in the morning, just got off work, or you're having trouble sleeping? Can't go out and hunt for women at that time of night. Answer - online dating services.

However, as a DJ, the best mindset to have when trying these things out would be to use it as just another opportunity to meet women when other options are ruled out for the time being.

There's many options out there for online services. Go for the ones that are free. You don't need to pay money to meet women in real life, so why should you have to pay money to meet women online? You're already paying you're ISP, that should be enough.

When writing you're profile, use you're ****y+funny skills. This has been mentioned in David Deangelo's newsletters, and he's right on the money with this one. Be creative, and don't say too much about yourself - to keep mysterious. Don't write lovey-mushy 5hit to impress her (which should be a given at this site).

After you write your kick-ass profile, go read some of the guys profiles and laugh at them. This gives you a clear idea of what you're up against in the online world - not really any different from the AFCs in the real world. After reading some of these, you'll get a clear indication that most of these guys have absolutely nothing better to do than sit in front of the computer, and try the online version of what they failed at.

As for choosing a picture, it really doesn't matter what you choose, since you're written profile will be the decision maker. Just make sure you're not naked or with another woman in your picture. If you're with a woman in your picture, you will immediately get written off as a player.

After you've met a woman, the off the fvcking internet as quick as possible, or you'll be placed into the "Email Buddy" category. Get her on the phone as quick as possible to set up a date. Don't set up a date through Email. Use that to get her number.

The main thing to remember when trying online dating sites is - use it as just another way to meet women. Don't rely on it to get your dates. You'll still need your DJ skills if you should set up a date with a girl you met online.

------------------
"Look in your mirror, It'll tell you the truth,
Don't waste your time away
Thinkin' bout yesterday's blues" - Richie Sambora
 

Ralph Bellamy

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The number of online services that are free, is shrinking. With that in mind, I would highly recommend Cupid Junction, where you pay per contact, as opposed to 25 bucks a month for what could be next to nothing in the way of responses.
www.cupidjunction.com

Matchdoctor.com is free for exactly five days and even then your contacts are limited. But I did meet one woman during my five day trial and we went out Thursday night, went surprising well. First time I ever noticed IL rise before my eyes. :-D
 

Bonhomme

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You've got the idea, BP. Based on my very limited experience so far, the more of a smartass I came across as in my profile, and the more myserious, the better responses I've had.
 

pilot0001

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I agree with you 100% except for one thing. I don't think it should be viewed as a "last resort." But at the same time it shouldn't be your only means.

I've been using internet personals for a couple years year and have met some very interesting girls. But I've also met some hidous female versions of an AFC.
 

Ricardo

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Damn Matchdoctor want's money now too?

I got in on yahoo last summer when it was free and now it isn't and then matchdoctor this summer while it was free and apparently they aren't anymore

WTF

Are there any free one's anymore?
 

stratt

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Online dating services any good?

I was looking through the yahoo personals and there are some really good looking women near where I live. Has anyone tried these online personals, and are they any good? What are the better ones?
 

FlyGuy

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I tried online dating for a while, before most of them turned into pay sites. One thing I REALLY don't like about online dating is that the guy/girl ratio is SO skewed its ridiculous. A good looking girl will go through probably 50 responses before she gets to yours (unless you respond RIGHT after her add is posted) which IMO is not the kind of odds you want.

Another BIG problem with online dating (which IMO is the biggest reason not to use it) is that you THINK you have a good idea of what the girl is like - until you meet them face to face. Heck, even the ones with pictures sometimes turn out to be TOTALLY different in real life.

I think you CAN be succesful with online dating but its not as easy as you may think. In short, online dating may seem like its easier (rejection isn't so painful, you can take your time and plan out what you say, etc. etc.) but from my experience its just better to suck it up and go out into the REAL world to find women. I also think that once you get your game going, you'll have a much higher success rate in the real world.


[This message has been edited by FlyGuy (edited 10-18-2002).]
 

Cuffer

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Dude, there are plenty of hot girls out there in the real world, theres no need for the online dating. You can do it, just get out to the bar, and get that hottie. Online dating is for the lazy man. :p
 

Thug Intellect

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My sentiments exzactly cuffer.
 
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