"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Online dating question

poohead

Senior Don Juan
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Just like it is not good to call her immediately after the first date, or to answer the phone every time she calls because it will make you seem too available - is it right to assume that you should not reply to a message from a woman immediately, because it will make you seem like you're just sitting at your computer all day waiting for messages to come in? What is the equivalent of the '3-day' rule with online personals messages? answer them the next day?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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LJC

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I hate those rules. They're pretty much over-used by men and well known by women. Pay more attention to avoiding bad consistency than timing. If you're always there when she calls, always respond immediately when she writes, then yeah, not a good thing to do. But there is nothing wrong with responding to one e-mail within only an hour and another the day after you get it. Because that's how life really is. Sometimes you're there, sometimes you're busy.
 

DJHoolahoop

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And in fact LJC, I find that because I'm so busy its that I HAVE to respond sooner than later. Otherwise I forget about the girl and won't talk to her for weeks maybe a month. Its in being to preoccupied in HER that's the "problem". Good point though man!
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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DJHoolahoop said:
And in fact LJC, I find that because I'm so busy its that I HAVE to respond sooner than later. Otherwise I forget about the girl and won't talk to her for weeks maybe a month. Its in being to preoccupied in HER that's the "problem". Good point though man!
I agree. This easily happens when you are sarging multiple women at once. It's best to at least touch base with your prospects at least once every week or two. Me? I try to keep it down to 10 days or less to make sure her IL stays high.
 
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