Online Dating Blunders?

[Bronxtal112]

So I signed up for eharmony for the 1st time. Been getting a ton of hits on my ad, mostly from 5-6's. So one in particular shows a ton of interest, wants to know everything about me. We exchange a few emails - laugh, joke, flirt then I asked for the number. Bam! As soon as I asked for the number she hasn't replied since.

Any ideas on whats happening here? Reason why -- if every chick on there is gonna do this $hit I don't even wanna waste my time.

 

[jophil28]

So I signed up for eharmony for the 1st time. Been getting a ton of hits on my ad, mostly from 5-6's. So one in particular shows a ton of interest, wants to know everything about me. We exchange a few emails - laugh, joke, flirt then I asked for the number. Bam! As soon as I asked for the number she hasn't replied since.

Any ideas on whats happening here? Reason why -- if every chick on there is gonna do this $hit I don't even wanna waste my time.

AW - gold plated, attention seeking, ego inflating, game playing, time wasting, mind fvcking teenager in an adult body.

Look elsewhere.

 

[legolas]

Bingo!!

jophil nailed it right on the head. You can send a follow up email if you want but I'd consider this a lost case.

 

[MikeEdward1973]

After you exchange 2 messages, suggest that you meet up. I don't bother with asking for her number. Ask if she's going to be around next week, and if she'd like to link up for a drink.

The more emails you trade, the bigger a deal it's going to seem like when you try to close.

You email her, she emails you back, you email her again, she email you back, close her - asking to meet up. If she goes silent, that's it, close her out.

But that's just me.

 

[Phyzzle]

I've seen a few like that. I notice that they generally have profiles on numerous sites, and the join date shows that they've been logging in every day for at least a year. Even on pay sites, some women just aren't thrilled about the idea of meeting anybody in real life. It's like a MMPORPG, but for women.

 

[Luveno]

Be careful.

There is some suspicion that dating sites like e-harmony employ people to act as interested up until real-world interaction is requested. Essentially its a manually-operated fake profile. Doing so keeps desperate men on their site, looking for dates.

I'd get rid of e-harmony and focus on myspace, facebook, and hotornot when it comes to e-gaming.

 

[st_99]

Yahoo personals was recently the subject of a class action lawsuit. The lawsuit stated that Yahoo intentionally posted fake profiles and sent out sham romantic emails to members who's subscriptions were about to expire in order to get them to renew their subscription. Yahoo settled out of court.

Wow, yahoo did this!

I definitely knew about this behavior from lesser know sites (its so obvious) but I would never have suspected yahoo doing this.. lame.

 

[Bronxtal112]

Update

So I signed up for eharmony for the 1st time. Been getting a ton of hits on my ad, mostly from 5-6's. So one in particular shows a ton of interest, wants to know everything about me. We exchange a few emails - laugh, joke, flirt then I asked for the number. Bam! As soon as I asked for the number she hasn't replied since.

Any ideas on whats happening here? Reason why -- if every chick on there is gonna do this $hit I don't even wanna waste my time.

K fellas. First things first. I wanna say thanks to the guys who gave me their two cents. Not like it matters much, but here's an update.

I sent her an email saying how I am going to close the match. She never responded. Then, I close the match. NOW, after I closed the match she sends me an email saying - "I really felt that we had potential. I'd like you to reconsider. "

How should I handle this. I sense some tomfoolery here. $hit, I had women play games w/ me in real life, I learning they even play games on the internet - whats even sadder is - shes 28.

 

[Jitterbug]

How should I handle this. I sense some tomfoolery here.

Stick to your guns. You made the decision.

Online dating sites are full of sh!t like this. Fake profiles, bots or hired guns sending scripted emails to people in order to keep them registered & paying. Women with too much spare time in need of an ego boost while having no intention of following it through. Myspace-angle photos. Fake photos. etc.

People say that it's convenient but I think it's a hell lot more work than the good ol' fashion way of meeting people "offline".

 

[MikeEdward1973]

K fellas. First things first. I wanna say thanks to the guys who gave me their two cents. Not like it matters much, but here's an update.

I sent her an email saying how I am going to close the match. She never responded. Then, I close the match. NOW, after I closed the match she sends me an email saying - "I really felt that we had potential. I'd like you to reconsider. "

How should I handle this. I sense some tomfoolery here. $hit, I had women play games w/ me in real life, I learning they even play games on the internet - whats even sadder is - shes 28.

I avoid problems like this by simply ignoring women who don't agree to meet after 3-4 emails.

Is she a bot/fake profile? I dunno, maybe. Probably not. Is she a flake? Most likely. Ignore her, move on.

 

[LoneRanger]

Move on.

Check out my first 3 or 4 threads I started at this forum a couple months ago to see what happened to me with a bad AW I met online.

Thanks to the people here I've dodged the bullet a couple times afterward.

Been on Match and eHarmony since March 2008 and am dumping eHarmony when it expires. No communications or matches from eH in a long time. Only got one date of from it and she was a total narcissus flake.

Last week Match automatically renewed my subscription for another 3 months without my knowing it until I saw my Credit Card statement but I am dumping them also when that is up.

It works out good for some guys but was a complete waste of time and $$$ for me.

The other poster was right. There are a lot women there just looking for attention. No face to face meetings.

 

[Outofexile]

Ok what to do then?

Been thinking about posting a question similar to this but since this was posted, I figured I would jump on the wagon.

I went the match, eharmony thing. Didnt get much response. I mean, Im definately above average looking, good job, good education, can talk well etc. However, very limited success. Ive been successful with very few women on the online site. Dont know what it is. I keep reading comments like "make your profile stand out" or "what about your profile makes you different from the other 100 guys before you?".

So what do you do if you are 35 and dont do the bars. I live in a city with honestly, high AIDS % and Im just not interested in having a revolving door for the local sluts at the bars.

So if not bars, and not online and all my friends seem to be married with zero single female friends, what next?

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

eHarmony is a Buffer.

There is simply no substitute for direct, face to face, contact. How much of this high school drama would've been avoided if you'd met her face to face?

Get off the Buffers. Don't be afraid of rejection.

 

[Outofexile]

Understand that face to face is needed. Definately agree. Ive always been a good salesman if I can get them face to face. Its getting there that has been the problem.

If not, online or bars, where then to meet that is actually doable?

 

[sodbuster]

You missed the posters from Nigeria,supermodel hot;e-mailing you and deeply in love with your profile.Wire me money so we can meet[riiiiiiiight]
Try looking where you shop. Go to the stores when they are busy and meet women there.

 

[Stavrogin]

I won't use eHarmony again. A few years ago, I read that the site matches you with non-subscribers who you can't even communicate with. When I e-mailed eHarmony to demand a refund, they replied that they do indeed match people with non-subscribers, but only because they want you to feel the joy of knowing what it's like to be matched with someone based on the 29 dimensions of compatibility. At any rate, most of my matches were really fat.

 

[Luveno]

Do Not Pay For Internet Dating Sites

It is an absolute rip-off.

Think about it: if a woman is willing to pay to meet people ONLINE, then they must be extremely desperate. Women are the hunted; if they are high quality they should have men kicking down their doors everyday!


I can't believe fools pay for those websites...useless.

 

[MikeEdward1973]

It is an absolute rip-off.

Think about it: if a woman is willing to pay to meet people ONLINE, then they must be extremely desperate. Women are the hunted; if they are high quality they should have men kicking down their doors everyday!


I can't believe fools pay for those websites...useless.

Speak for yourself. It works like a charm for me.

The only fool around here is the one that makes a blanket generalization, and assumes it's true for everyone.

 

[Luveno]

Speak for yourself. It works like a charm for me.

The only fool around here is the one that makes a blanket generalization, and assumes it's true for everyone.

There are many potential reasons for your success with women using a pay-dating website:

1. Your area is an anomaly in that attractive women use pay-dating sites.

2. You have lower standards than I do.

3. You're lying.

4. You've got money invested in one of these pay-dating sites, or you run one yourself.

Either way, you're out more money than I am for the same thing. You lose.

 

[MikeEdward1973]

There are many potential reasons for your success with women using a pay-dating website:

1. Your area is an anomaly in that attractive women use pay-dating sites.

2. You have lower standards than I do.

3. You're lying.

Either way, you're out more money than I am for the same thing. You lose.

Go run a search on Match in NY, Chicago, LA, or San Francisco. Set your search criteria for single white females, ages 18 to 30, no kids, in athletic shape. Don't think they're hot? Then you're not straight.