the_govner
Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 2, 2008
- Messages
- 134
- Reaction score
- 1
I didn't contact her. 2 full days now. Will keep it this way.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
I see you breaking down and contacting her. DON'T DO IT.the_govner said:I didn't contact her. 2 full days now. Will keep it this way.
My Name is Nobody said:I see you breaking down and contacting her. DON'T DO IT.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
snowdog said:The 2nd or 3rd time you called her that day you should had left a pissed off voicemail message. If she calls you you gotta let her know you don't tolerate sh*t like this.
But she probably won't call you. I know your problem all too well my friend. It's not easy.
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
the_govner said:I need advice. I was amazingly flaked on.
My question is: Do I let it go? Tell her off? Take any action? Or just sit back? For any girl i would sit back, but this feels different. I was actually in love with this girl. She has no history of being cruel or disrespectful.