"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Oneitis - Best thing to ever happen?

Thatonekid92

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I've made posts about obsessing over a girl I asked out at a store and after she rejected me, she would still stare me down and was still attracted... but not to the point of breaking up with her BF :cuss: LOL

So, I am still a tad bit obsessed with this girl. I am trying to get over Oneitis and I am no longer convincing myself that she is the one.

She was a plane jane that, for whatever reason... I just wanted really badly.

Here is the thing - I still go into that store (After all, it's a grocery store closest to my home) and for the past few weeks I haven't seen her.

I mean, even before that I'd only see her once every 2 weeks if I had to go in there, but my point is - I'm thinking she quit.

After she rejected me (Literally back in decemeber) I always wanted to walk up and just talk to her... but I couldn't. I was too embarrassed, so I just avoided eye contact when I caught her looking at me.

So I view this as 1 of 2 things, tell me what you think.

1. Lesson NOT learned, you never even faced up the courage to speak with her again and made yourself look like a *****.

2. Well now you CANNOT have oneitis because hell, you'll never see her again! She's gone and you only know her first name!

Also, I was.. WAS completely over this until (Very cringe worthy), I had 2 dreams in a week and both of them portrayed me going up to her, winning her over, and her telling me that she really liked me all along. That essential woke up this obsession again for another round.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Zarky

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Whatever. Young guys get oneitis all the time. No big deal. At least you realize you should be getting past it. Knowing is half the battle :)

The only time to be worried is if it makes you do weird sh*t like stalk her or avoid other, REAL women. If it alters your behavior substantially then you should worry. If it's just a compulsive thought here and there it's not a big deal.

As you get older (30s and up) these little "crushes" will happen less and less frequently.
 

Bingo-Player

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Haha oneitis with a BF is lethal

I was / still am majorly hung up on a chick with a BF.....slightly different to yours as ive actually had a relationship with mine in the past and i let her slip through my fingers which belive it or not hurts even more

Anyway long story short she wont split with her BF either so its either i spend the next year beating myself up over it or i man up and go bang some chicks.......... which is what i did and it has actually put her to the back of my mind for the time being and let me get on with my life

Crack on with your game and spin some plates when this chick eventually finishes with her BF and it will happen....... the new you will be ready to pounce
 

sylvester the cat

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My one itis actually did split up with her boy friend. She kept on insisting it wasn't because of me even though I never said it was.
 

Thatonekid92

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Mixed replies, but I like it, interesting. Thanks for the advice.

Also, I've been told that she just went away for the summer to work somewhere else and she'll be back. Makes me think.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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