Once fat ugly, and now here is my problem

[verysuave]

sup fellas,

ive been fat, ugly the past 23 years of my life. But during the past year, ive lost good chunk of the weight, been working out, and now, feel much more confident about myself. I've noticed lately that i've kinda had this jerk like attitude too. But anyway

At work yesterday, my female co worker and I crossed paths on one of the grocery store isles and held eye contact for like 5 seconds and she goes

chick: "Guess what?"
me: "huh what?"
chick "you're cute"
me: "i know" (i got this from sosuave"

so....since ive never had ANY WOMAN IN MY LIFE EVER tell me that i'm cute to my face like that, i felt that she was just joking around or just probably misleading me so she can see the wussy in me.

If you have gone through what i've gone throuhg, did you ever feel this way?

 

[verysuave]

its kinda like not being used to your new super powers? i dunno.. what do you giyus think

 

[ChrizZ]

It is called a boost of confidence

 

[SamePendo]

Haha good work.

Next time you cross paths, tell her

verysuave: Guess what?!
chick: what?
Verysuave: You're cute yourself too!

fluff talk, get the # and fvck her!

 

[verysuave]

so....since ive never had ANY WOMAN IN MY LIFE EVER tell me that i'm cute to my face like that, i felt that she was just joking around or just probably misleading me so she can see the wussy in me.

If you have gone through what i've gone throuhg, did you ever feel this way?

 

[blinkwatt]

so....since ive never had ANY WOMAN IN MY LIFE EVER tell me that i'm cute to my face like that, i felt that she was just joking around or just probably misleading me so she can see the wussy in me.

If you have gone through what i've gone throuhg, did you ever feel this way?

Doesn't matter if its a joke or not THERE IS ALWAYS SOME TRUTH TO IT! Don't try to think soo much of it,truth is,if she said it to your face then there is more then likely more people thinking that inside their heads. Just bust balls and be confident and you will be fine.

Good Luck!

 

[Jariel]

Yeah I went through the same thing. I went most of my life being insulted, feeling like sh1t and having women joke at my expense. After I lost weight there was a period where I was still very insecure and still thought of myself as the fat ugly guy. I used to think compliments were either sarcastic or a kind gesture to make me feel good about myself.

What it comes down to is the way you form your identity. If you spend many years identifying yourself as Mr Fat and Ugly, and have other people drumming it into your head, that's who you become. So even though you change the physical side of things by losing weight and looking good, it takes some time for your self identity to catch up.

This is where affirmations come in useful. They sound a bit like a new age gimmick, but they definitely help a lot. You simply need to start telling yourself positive things and put a stop to any critical mental voices you have. When you're walking down the street, stand tall and tell yourself "I'm looking trim and hot today".

Anyway, congratulations of losing weight. It's an achievement to be proud of and once your head catches up and you gain your confidence, life will get a whole lot better.

As for your encounter, and any other compliments you receive, you should just assume it's genuine from now on.

 

[rocky_mtn]

so....since ive never had ANY WOMAN IN MY LIFE EVER tell me that i'm cute to my face like that, i felt that she was just joking around or just probably misleading me so she can see the wussy in me.

If you have gone through what i've gone throuhg, did you ever feel this way?

Don't doubt yourself, you've made an effort for improvement and now you are reaping the rewards. Don't over think it, or turn it into anything negative. She told you straight up that she thinks you're cute, learn to accept compliments.