On fear

[jonny football hero]

Yea, many there be that have run out of their wits for women, and become servants for their sakes. Many also have perished, have erred, and sinned, for women.... O ye men, how can it be but women should be strong, seeing they do thus?" ----- ESDRAS

I recently read this in "jude the obscure" by Thomas Hardy and it struck me. If we are scared of women, intimidated of approaching them, it is our fault ( well to be more precise AFC's fault).

I cannot think of where it went wrong. Think back to the days of the caveman, if he saw a women he liked, he'd hit her with his club and drag her by the hair back to his cave. There was no fear involved for him and it worked, we are alive and we are descendants of caveman. Obviously evolution kicked in and we can't do that anymore, but why do we still fear?

We no longer have "clubs" to hit women with, but we have all our skills, learnt from here, so what is the big deal about using them in the field? knock 'em out with your Dj skills.

The only time women become intimidating is when you let them. Show them you are dominant, stand tall, straddle your legs, and don't look away first when you get eye contact!, women will be putty in your highly masculine hands!

You can spend years on here digesting the information, but it means jack until you get out there and use it.

 

[check_mate_kid_uk]

your right about the fact a man has to be a man and be dominent, i tinhk the problem AFC's have is they try to be feminin thinking it will make women like them if they are sensitive when all they will become to a girl is another one of her 'girl freinds' they also asume women want you to let them walk over you, which of course is not true, and then they ask, "why do women prefer jerks?" well its because jerks do not let women wlak over them, they are dominent and not sensitive

 

[Caveman]

I believe it went wrong when church began to interfear and made society believe it was God's wish that a man should have one woman, they should get married and have kids.

The idea of monogamy began to arise and hasn't really left since. Even though not everyone believes in god, christianity or other religion that supports this thought, monogamy had entered general society and besides the fact that people should be faithful to their spouses, they should also be equal.

Now, I have no problem with man and women being equal, but they are not the same. I think eventually, both men and women forgot who they were in the relationship and began to be more like each other. Therefor, men were not good examples to their sons and women in turn, told their daughters that they didn't need sleep with just any man. They had a choice.

So to sum up: women learned how to take advantage of being women by withholding sex while men got scared and confused.

 

[jonny football hero]

Originally posted by Caveman


So to sum up: women learned how to take advantage of being women by withholding sex while men got scared and confused.

exactly, it all goes back to putting women on pedestals, because they are an important part of sex (doing it on your own isn't the same)

It's like a precious commidity, they have it, we want it and they can make us do just about anything to get it. It's sad, but we are a minority (dj's that is) and we can do nothing about it.

 

[check_mate_kid_uk]

caveman i tihnk the reason this happens is because people imitate peolpe they like, i use a lot of C&F on some girls and 1 freind of mine loves this, plus it appers to drive her crazy (in a good way) and shes started being C&F like me. So whats happening is that men are copying women and women are copying men. I think our only answer is to pick a a strong male role model and imitate him instead

 

[jonny football hero]

Originally posted by check_mate_kid_uk
I think our only answer is to pick a a strong male role model and imitate him instead

I don't agree with that, I would rather be my own man, and learn by experience, than learn through others.

 

[check_mate_kid_uk]

if you can do that then fine, i try and do that and partly use role models but mostly be myself, the problem is a lot of people seem to sub consiously imitate some one close to them, so you need to make sure you think aobut what you want to be like.

 

[DJBen]

Everyone exists. Most of these people have some sort of vision. No matter how big or small. Some people have more than others.

Fear is what stops you from achieving your goals and achieving your visions. That fear comes from you. You are your problem when it comes to fear.

So what causes the fear?

The fear to approach women came from long ago - when humans lived in small groups. We were aparently of a good consciencness and understood basic social dynamics. The small group was of course the biggest problem with approaching the women...

If you found a woman attractive and went for her, you had balls. You had balls because your local group is what kept you alive. The teamwork kept all of you from starving, getting ill or have the weather freeze you to death.

The women were sort of prizes back then - the man the provider. If you screwed up, you could well face being 'out of the group'. You'd have to stick it out yourself or find another group. Either of the two choices werent pleasant. So man had to adapt.

As the social awareness...thing... increased, so did this fear of rejection.

THE MODERN DAY

You're in a huge town or city with thousands of people. Can you remember a person you saw in town the other day that you didnt find hot/unique? hell no. If you approach a woman now, she's not going to pull a knife and kill you, she'll just act awkward and one of you will walk off. whoah, what is that?! they're not some superhuman being?! hell no. Thats your illusion.

This fear doesnt exist anymore. It doesnt exist in you, or in me. As soon as you can bring yourself to remember the fact you'll almost never see that person again, or be forced to talk to them later, it should all become a lot clearer. Approaching a woman isnt about having balls these days. Many other things take balls. Making a change takes balls.

A stranger is just a friend/lover you havnt met yet. Make it that way.

DJB

 

[jonny football hero]

Originally posted by DJBen


A stranger is just a friend/lover you havnt met yet. Make it that way.

Yeah, either that or rape in a dark alley waiting to happen

Credit : Maddox.xmission

Sorry, that really isn't helping to the whole "approach" thing. So ignore it.