on control

[joekerr31]

just wanted to make a quick post. i think a big problem a lot of guys have on this board is that they don't understand the world of "control".

one of the biggest mistakes you can make in life is thinking that you are in control of anything other than your OWN behavior, thoughts and feelings.

BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT!

think of your life as a tiny circle. whether its your personal life, your work life, and everything thats in between.

that is what you have control over. and that little circle is contained with a HUGE giant circle. and everything outside that little circle you have very little DIRECT control over.

outside of yoru little circle is chaos. sometimes you will be able to manipulate the chaos to your favor. sometimes no matter what you do the chaos is simply going to be what its going to be. sometimes that means you are going to get screwed for no good reason.

most people however, don't even have a little circle. they have no circle. their personal and professional lives are as chaotic as the world immediately around them.

hence why they live such insanely stressful lives and always seem to have unnecessary drama going on and are never really content or happy with their life.

now here's the cool thing with having a little circle - anyone who steps into your little circle lives by your rules. and if they don't, they get booted back out into the chaos. hehe.

this to me is one of the absolutely essential elements to becoming a complete man.

I can attribute probably 80% of my success in life, regardless of what area of life we are talking about, to this simple concept.

framed differently, it's basically about improving your life, living your life, and not handing over responsbility for your life to other people. It's also about NEVER EVER seeing yourself as a victim. because within that little circle your world is of your own making.

anyway, this paradigm is also seen in folks who are religious. their little circle is God, and no matter what happens externally, in that little circle they feel loved and feel secure and confident in themselves, the decisions they have made, and the future.

this little circle doesn't have to be god, it can simply be just you - but it is the area where the chaos of the external world is not allowed to enter.

master this and nothing in this world can tear you down - much less some chic.

 

[joekerr31]

oh, one other thing.

this paradigm never ever changes. right until the day you die this will be how it life is.

you can get married, and you still wont have control over anything but your own circle.

you can have kids and its still the same.

i suppose in some ways compatiblility is a lot about finding a woman whose circle overlaps with your own with a fair amount of syncrhonicity.

 

[insidious]

Thank you joekerr -

Everything you stated here is ostensibly what this site IS about.

It's not about picking up women, it's not about getting laid, and it's not about charming the crap outta women.

Women, and success with them, is only the byproduct of attaining an intense level of manhood and maturity. And self-acceptance. Until most of the youngsters reach this level of maturity, they will continue to try figuring out (and actually care) what makes women tick and why they act like they do, and living in constant fear of all things AFC!

 

[Victory Unlimited]

Another Bomb Ass post, Joekerr31!


It was insightful, thoughtful, and totally devoid of the rancor, the uber macho posing, and the constant "You're an AFC!" accusations that USUALLY gets posted on here lately. lol

The mindset you espouse reminds me of one of my favorite quotes from David Carradine from KUNG FU: THE LEGEND CONTINUES. He said:

"Do not seek to control...be IN control."

And there you have it. And finally, regarding your post: In completely Olympic scoring terminology I give it an ELEVEN in execution.

I woulda' given it a TWELVE, but I'm still waiting to see how some of these other "DJs" around here will "dismount" from it. LOL





Peace...one day.

 

[resilient]

Great post man, your DJ wisdom has been missed here.

 

[Heretolearn]

just wanted to make a quick post. i think a big problem a lot of guys have on this board is that they don't understand the world of "control".

one of the biggest mistakes you can make in life is thinking that you are in control of anything other than your OWN behavior, thoughts and feelings.

BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT!

think of your life as a tiny circle. whether its your personal life, your work life, and everything thats in between.

that is what you have control over. and that little circle is contained with a HUGE giant circle. and everything outside that little circle you have very little DIRECT control over.

outside of yoru little circle is chaos. sometimes you will be able to manipulate the chaos to your favor. sometimes no matter what you do the chaos is simply going to be what its going to be. sometimes that means you are going to get screwed for no good reason.

most people however, don't even have a little circle. they have no circle. their personal and professional lives are as chaotic as the world immediately around them.

hence why they live such insanely stressful lives and always seem to have unnecessary drama going on and are never really content or happy with their life.

now here's the cool thing with having a little circle - anyone who steps into your little circle lives by your rules. and if they don't, they get booted back out into the chaos. hehe.

this to me is one of the absolutely essential elements to becoming a complete man.

I can attribute probably 80% of my success in life, regardless of what area of life we are talking about, to this simple concept.

framed differently, it's basically about improving your life, living your life, and not handing over responsbility for your life to other people. It's also about NEVER EVER seeing yourself as a victim. because within that little circle your world is of your own making.

anyway, this paradigm is also seen in folks who are religious. their little circle is God, and no matter what happens externally, in that little circle they feel loved and feel secure and confident in themselves, the decisions they have made, and the future.

this little circle doesn't have to be god, it can simply be just you - but it is the area where the chaos of the external world is not allowed to enter.

master this and nothing in this world can tear you down - much less some chic.

brilliant!