You guys lemme know if this sounds like a girl I've been talking to is playing 'hard to get' or just plain playing ME. I met her about a month ago now at a grad party...not much was said then, but the next day I sent her a goofy/playful message that we should hang out sometime. A couple genial messages were exchanged, and finally I got her number, and just last week we went out on first 'date'...she came over pretty late, and we walked to the store and got some ice cream and then went back to my place to watch a movie (funny comedy). The reason it was difficult setting up a time to get together is because I work 8-5 every day, and her job is 5-11 almost every night, so I thought it was nice that she let me know her first 'half-night' off so that we could get together, even it wasn't until 10 PM. The date went very well. There were some definite instances of kino, and she shared a LOT about her life with me. The movie ended around midnight, and she didn't leave until about 1 AM...because I had to work the next day, so I started pulling the old yawn move because I need my sleep...but nothing rude, in fact, it was a very engaging 1 hour convo. The thing is, in order to plan dinner dates and stuff, she needs to let ME know when she is free, because she is the one who works nights, yet she isn't exactly a very responsive texter/communicator. I did a lot of work initiating the first date, but I'm not gonna constantly text her every day to see if she's working that night. Basically, we really don't have a great form of casual communication. I have texted her a couple times after the date...to no response yet (in 3 days). I understand she works every day, but it takes 30 seconds to respond to a text. There was literally nothing wrong that I can even think of that went wrong on the date, so I'm wondering why she hasn't opened up yet, and started casually texting/communicating me. Like I said, I'm not gonna text her again, I've already had two go unanswered...but I definitely see this girl as a dating prospect, and things aren't gonna go anywhere if we're only communicating like once a week. Do I just need to be patient and wait for her to let me know when she's free and stop over-analyzing everything? Also, I found it interesting that on our first real time hanging out together, she brought up all of her past boyfriends casually in convo...nothing super detailed, but about how one of them cheated on her a few years back...and how things were 'on and off' with her most recent boyfriend of a few months back, but he's still good friends with the family, and that they still occasionally hang out in groups. Just wondering if there was any reason she felt that necessary to bring up. Thanks.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Old Cliche 'Playing Hard to Get...'
- Thread starter A-Man2151
- Start date