Okay, what the hell did I do wrong here?

[Nexus Polaris]

The weekend before last, I got this girl I had been talking to for a couple of weeks over myspace to come all the way across town at 1 in the morning to pick me up and drive me back to her place. Then the next day, I did it again. This girl was more into me than any girl I've seen in a long time. The first night, she kept looking away. She called me suave. And she couldn't take more than 3 drags off of her cigarette before having to put it out and come back inside because she couldn't stand being away from me. I even got a quickly retracted drunken "I love you" at the end of the night. The second night as I was putting in a movie, I asked her what she wanted to see, and she said under her breath, "Who cares? It's just background noise." She wanted to fvck me. And we fvcked both nights.

The end of the third day before she took me home, she kept saying things like, "That shouldn't work," every time I would do something that made her smile. The whole weekend she seemed pissed off at herself for liking me as much as she did.

So we made plans to hang out this Friday night since she was already going to be on this side of town getting a tattoo. Thursday, she sends me this message:

"bah. question.

looks like friday night will be more tied up than i thought. my parents want me to come to have dinner with them in tomball, and then i've got to run by my grandmother's...then the tattoo appointment has turned out to be later than i thought. i doubt i'll be able to make it out to molly's, plus i'll be at the mercy of whoever's driving out there (not me, won't have my car). i was wondering if we could hang out on saturday or something. if you're busy, no big deal. just wanted to let you know what was up. miss hanging out with you already.

<3 megs"


Sounds harmless enough, right? So I respond telling her I'm sorry she can't make it, but that I understand. I also tell her I'll call her tomorrow, to which she replies:

"please do. i'll really try to answer. have fun tomorrow night, sweetie. "

Try to? This girl texted me 30 minutes after dropping me off the first time just to let me know she got home okay.

But it gets better. I called her the next day like I said I would, and she was really short with me on the phone saying she was about to leave to go have dinner with her parents and that she would "try" to show up for St. Patrick's Day. Not only did she not show up, but she didn't call either to let me know she wasn't coming.

I waited until just today to contact her since I hadn't heard from her. And she had been on myspace every day except Sunday. Yet she made no effort to send me an apology about flaking. I sent her a simple message with nothing but question marks an hour or two ago, and she read it but didn't respond. When I got back home I called just to see if she would pick up which I knew she wouldn't. And she didn't.


How does a girl go from practically wanting to marry you one weekend to not even returning your calls the next? I don't understand what happened.

 

[kreuz]

I even got a quickly retracted drunken "I love you" at the end of the night. The second night as I was putting in a movie, I asked her what she wanted to see, and she said under her breath, "Who cares? It's just background noise." She wanted to fvck me. And we fvcked both nights.

Here is the first indication of what happened my friend. Note the phrase that is in bold. You were basically a well overdue booty call. You have now gone and scared her by contacting her way too much. You're a DJ, act like one!

You got laid, you had a good time, and now she is giving you the cold shoulder and becoming "busy". Basically she is telling you to step back, take a breather, and not get all clingy. Grow a pair mate and find someone else because she most likely had her fun and is done with you.

 

[Obsidian]

had a girl act similarly toward me around Halloween. I mainly attribute such behavior to wh0rishness.

In my case, it was just a brief (physical) hookup and it soon became clear that we didn't have much in common. Don't know if that's the case with you, tho.

 

[Nexus Polaris]

That's the thing, though. I didn't contact her hardly at all. She initiated the messaging on myspace. I always waited a day before responding. I always left her sending me the last message. I didn't even contact her at all between the weekend and Thursday. And I was about to just so she didn't think I had used her when she sent me that message asking me to reschedule Friday.

If anything, I thought I might have been too distant. Today was the first time I had tried to contact her unprovoked.

And it wasn't like we didn't have anything in common. In fact, the creepy part was that we had damn near everything in common.

I'm not saying it wasn't just a long overdue booty call, but she sure worried a lot if that was the case. She almost didn't put out the first night because she didn't want me to think she was a slut.

 

[kreuz]

Nexus Polaris,

When it comes to being with a girl that you have a "creepy" amount of things in common, you might as well be dating yourself. Just some advice from someone who has been there, trust me the fun will die out quickly.

Back to the matter at hand, upon further reflecting upon your situation I believe she might believe she did the wrong thing and is looking to forget that it ever happened, by ignoring the fact that it did. Move on to greener pastures and never close any doors because you never know she might warm up to you again and you may one night need to make a 3am booty call.

Take it easy and keep your head up, staring at your feet too long may make you miss a better opportunity!

 

[Dannyrt34]

Let me ask this: What are you looking for with her?

A relationship?
If that's the case, you went way too fast. Seems like you seen each other non-stop the whole weekend, and went straight to her house. You seemed to both get way too attached too quickly. You did things together that COUPLES do after they been together for a few months. Either that or you did what people normally do for a quick hookup.

You skipped the whole dating phase, which is key in REALLY establishing yourselves with each other. You are supposed to get to know each other SLOWLY. Which let's there be more mystery and leaves her constantly 'wanting more'. You missed this whole phase and because of it, she's losing interest.

If you wanted a one nighter:
High five! you got it!

 

[Nexus Polaris]

I was just trying to do what everybody on here always says you should do. Fvck a girl and then decide what category she belongs in; one night stand, friends with benefits, relationship, etc.

It was this girl's idea to keep me around a second day. Maybe I should have told her no.

I didn't expect to develop any kind of real attachment to her, but we hit it off so well. It caught me off guard.

 

[ryannath]

This stuff has happened to me before too on a one night stand. I think she just wanted some diick from you, and she got it. Like the other guy said, blame is on whooreishness.

 

[Kings_royalty]

he weekend before last, I got this girl I had been talking to for a couple of weeks over myspace to come all the way across town at 1 in the morning to pick me up and drive me back to her place.

Red Flag #1.

No girl with her head on straight does this. Most girls that are this desperate usually have issues.

she couldn't take more than 3 drags off of her cigarette before having to put it out and come back inside because she couldn't stand being away from me. I even got a quickly retracted drunken "I love you" at the end of the night.

Red Flag #2.

Oh yeah, she's got problems bro...girls who say 'I love you' that quick are mentally or emotionally 'out of it'.

"please do. i'll really try to answer. have fun tomorrow night, sweetie.

Red Flag #3.

I will TRY to answer the phone...after all that? Yeah, you are better off without her bro. Consider yourself lucky, she didn't stay around long enough to cause you any real grief.

And I speak from experience bro, trust me on this.

 

[ozzfest]

Couple questions cuz this sounds like a situation I've had and I was curious if her background matches up with the chick I dated.

How old is she? Divorced? Any Kids?

Reason I ask is cuz these single moms have to juggle their schedules around the whole divorce situation. They can be wild on the weekends where they don't have the kid, but then have to return to being "mom" on the other weekends.

I've had those schitzo women before. One minute they come off clingy and over the top excited to see you. Then you blink an eye and they come off preoccupied.