Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
And trust me, i know you, your just going to coward out again. Wanna know how i know that? Because i was you. Your one-itis for this girl is so extreme there is absolutely no way you are going to approach her, so my advice is just give up on her.MrConfidence said:And I WILL approach her. I was going to today, but she wasn't there. Tuesday I just cowarded out, I'll admit that much.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Trust me you "don't" know me. And what I have for Marissa is not one-itis I just think she's attractive, and yes, I can approach her. And tomorrow I am going to approach her, even if it sucks, I still had the balls to go up there, which most guys lack.Rock_Solid said:And trust me, i know you, your just going to coward out again. Wanna know how i know that? Because i was you. Your one-itis for this girl is so extreme there is absolutely no way you are going to approach her, so my advice is just give up on her.
You think this is the easy way out? It may be, but this is what i eventually did and trust me, it works out for the best.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Thanks for the input Doc, but I'm pretty sure if I had a real "disorder" a real doctor would've already told me.Your obsessiveness, defensiveness and constant self-confirmation really make me think you might have something like a pervasive development disorder. From what I have first hand experience with, it seems like a mild mild case of autism.
Actually I'm a junior, but yeah I get what you're saying.shydude said:Shes a senior, time is running out. Make a move now, dont wait, ignorance wont help in this situation. Now you see her with her friends chillin at the table, what do you do? Come up with a smile and ask if you can join them, just join the conversation. Once your alone with her, make the move. Dont hesitate, stay out of friends zone, and be confident. Btw if shes a senior and your like a sophmore, then dont be surprised when she rejects you. Gl
There are these people I eat lunch with, that I could consider friends. I know of the dudes from wrestling, and 2 of the dudes from band. Though usually I'm not the guy who does a lot of talking, because I just can't seem to get into their conversations a lot.superchill89 said:do you have friends that you hang out with regularly at school? if so, what kind of people are they?
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
you such a waste of time...you have like what 6 peopel u think to be your friends (prlly dont consider you a close friend) lol....well why the **** dont you take the good advice like what i posted instead of only responding to insults toward youMrConfidence said:There are these people I eat lunch with, that I could consider friends. I know of the dudes from wrestling, and 2 of the dudes from band. Though usually I'm not the guy who does a lot of talking, because I just can't seem to get into their conversations a lot.
Close friends or not, we're friends and we get along; for all I care that's all that matters. And I DID take your advice, I didn't respond to it, but I did take it. I'm just done with the chick. Why simply concentrate on her when there are several other chicks I could be talking to? There's this girl named Beth, that I'm sort of interested in who recently broke up with her boyfriend I might want to get with. But I'll probably never approach her because that would be awkward. Plus I know she's got friends that I have a reputation with so...naes420 said:you such a waste of time...you have like what 6 peopel u think to be your friends (prlly dont consider you a close friend) lol....well why the **** dont you take the good advice like what i posted instead of only responding to insults toward you
It's because I'm a p*ssy, and don't have much confidence in my game, nor myself. I've read every article on this website, but I'm no better. I came to this site in my Freshmen year and actually approached a few girls, but none of those particular approaches were interesting, check my really early threads as "Viper" if you want to check those out. Then I don't know, Sophomore year I just sort of lost my drive, and this year isn't going that well either. When I first moved to this school district(8th grade) I pretty much gave everyone the impression that I was the quiet guy, and I think that's pretty much why everyone thinks I don't talk. And well, I am a quiet guy, and I admit I don't socialize much. Funny thing is is that in 7th grade at my prior school, a lot of people liked me; hell I even had good looking girls who would talk to me.superchill89 said:viper, answer this: why do you think you are still unable to get girls after years on the site, while others who came to this site as losers now can?
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
MrConfidence said:I'm pretty sure if I had a real "disorder" a real doctor would've already told me.
Pervasive developmental disorders can go lifetimes without diagnosis. You need a specialist.TheNewGuy said:Your obsessiveness, defensiveness and constant self-confirmation
why are you mr confedicnce then dumb ****...7th grade you hadnt hit puberty yet so think, girls arent so hard to talk to if you grow some balls and realzie they arent so much differnt from males except set aside the sex part....from what you say you lost your balls at pubertyMrConfidence said:It's because I'm a p*ssy, and don't have much confidence in my game, nor myself. I've read every article on this website, but I'm no better. I came to this site in my Freshmen year and actually approached a few girls, but none of those particular approaches were interesting, check my really early threads as "Viper" if you want to check those out. Then I don't know, Sophomore year I just sort of lost my drive, and this year isn't going that well either. When I first moved to this school district(8th grade) I pretty much gave everyone the impression that I was the quiet guy, and I think that's pretty much why everyone thinks I don't talk. And well, I am a quiet guy, and I admit I don't socialize much. Funny thing is is that in 7th grade at my prior school, a lot of people liked me; hell I even had good looking girls who would talk to me.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.