OK I'm having a reccurring problem, will someone who has some experience please help?

[L777]

Hey, OK so I'm getting better, but having a problem that keeps on happening.

Basiclly my interactions with women go something like this: (all natural game btw, no scripts)

Open (at a party/cold approach etc.) Speak for a few minutes, attract, get number and name (for facebook)

2-3 days later send text/facebook message, set up dinner or something around campus.

After Day 2, ask if they want to come back to room (I usually say to play guitar hero....it seems to work). Once in my room, play GH, watch TV, kino escelation, then makeout. Then I try and push it further and get stopped almost every time, I try freezeout and other LMR techniques but to no avail. So then what happens is we'll make out some more, and when she has to leave I'll say something like "I'll give you a call" to which she'll agree.

Next time we speak I often get LJBF, or even if I get a day 3 its kinda awkward, and I feel like SHE has the power, cos she knows what I want and she is controlling it.

How the HELL do I get round this and start closing the deal more often?

 

[L777]

Bump....I'm in college.....does no-one else get this?

 

[Snow Plowman]

Your post was pretty vague and just basically you stating what you usually do. It would be better to post an example of an interaction.

One thing for sure day3 is only awakward if YOU make it awkward. It's rather wierd that you get LJBF.

The reason why I say an example of an interaction is because there are so many things that could be the cause of this.

- Maybe you do no qualification and she is wondering why the hell you like her
- Maybe she isn't willing to have sex yet
- Maybe she can sense that you have outcome dependency

How does the LMR stuff not work

Overall some better details.

 

[Nighthawk]

Maybe you're a bad kisser?

 

[stylemaker]

Commandment #1
Flee and they will follow. Follow and they will flee.
-M.A.C.K. Tactics

 

[L777]

Your post was pretty vague and just basically you stating what you usually do. It would be better to post an example of an interaction.

One thing for sure day3 is only awakward if YOU make it awkward. It's rather wierd that you get LJBF.

The reason why I say an example of an interaction is because there are so many things that could be the cause of this.

- Maybe you do no qualification and she is wondering why the hell you like her
- Maybe she isn't willing to have sex yet
- Maybe she can sense that you have outcome dependency

How does the LMR stuff not work

Overall some better details.

Ok, I'm not a bad kisser, I know that.

The last time this happened was like a few days ago. I opened her at a party, she's like a solid 9.5. The interaction was something like this:

"Hey, whats in the bottle?" (It was unmarked)
"Vodka and cranberry, wanna try?"

Standard stuff, I bust on her for being a typical sorority girl, saying "y'all" and "na-ah" and stuff like that, qualify by asking what she does besides shopping and watching reality TV (she's a big reader apparently....yea its probably Cosmo or some such), standard C+F and I know she was attracted, got her number.

2 days later we go t a comedy event, I build rapport all the time, and theres this after party thing on the dancefloor, we dance and makeout. She comes back to my room that night, but the furthest I can go is getting her bra off.

OK, the next time we meet, like 2 days later, she coms to my room with some Vodka Cranberry again, and we put a movie in, makeout, bra off, and then I reach for the panties once, and she goes "no no no", so I use every trick I know, hair pulling, biting, dry f.uckin etc. get her really turned on....she should now obviously wanna have sex....when all of sudden she says, "I gotta go". That was like 2 days ago now, shes not answering my calls or texts and I'm pretty sure we're through.

The thing you said about outcome dependancy is interesting...but how can I not be outcome dependant, this girl is like Eva Mendes's prettier sister....she knows she's hot, I know she's hot, and what's worse, she knows I know if you see what I mean. How can I not come across as outcome dependent with a girl like that?

Another very similar time with a different girl I did the exact same thing, got her attracted etc, got back to her room, made out, then LMR, then "you should go", then LJBF the next day. I seriously don't get it.

One thing I though it might be is when a girl asks how many girls I've slept with I'm always honest and tell them (its been in the late teens for about a month now)....is this a bad thing?

Thoughts appreciated.


PS: The girl who was 9.5 was the hottest I've ever done anything with, and let me tell you, its SO much better. You kiss more passionately, you feel better afterwards....seriously, dont just limit yourself to girls that are 'in your league' (I'm an 8 in looks at best)....go for the main prize....the rewards are great. I only got to second base with this one girl but it was better than many of the 7s I've slept with, no joke.

 

[Snow Plowman]

lol, I'm not sure how big telling them how man chicks you laid is as I've never done that.

But the outcome dependency is pretty big because the girl can sense when you want it too bad and you have an outcome in mind. This will make girls not want to have sex.

Instead of worrying about getting sex, you should be 100% in the present moment and enjoying the interaction for what it is.

The best way I look to put it is that most guys see only the beginning and ending of a interaction because they are so focused on getting #s, kisses, sex. So they forget about everything besides the beginning and when there having sex. Meanwhile the girl was focused on everything because she was enjoying the whole interaction.

The biggest practice of this I've seen was guys gaming and going celibate for a year. It really takes that outcome dependency to the extreme because that whole year you train yourself to be focused more on the interaction and not the end goal.

Focus on the process and enjoy it. It will lead to sex eventually.

Hope this helps

 

[Ratisson]

Next time we speak I often get LJBF, or even if I get a day 3 its kinda awkward, and I feel like SHE has the power, cos she knows what I want and she is controlling it.

First off, realize that you are having way more success than most guys on this forum (myself included). Any one of us would love to be in ur position.

Here's a strategy. Why not bring them back to your place, make out with them and then NOT try to go for the F-close.

Why not just keep making out with them and then see what she wants to do with the interaction. Let her initiate the sex. If she wants it she'll let you know. So when you're making out with her just keep your hands to yourself. Seriously, like dont even touch her at all, and see how she reacts. She'll probably end up touching you more and getting more turned on by your amazing ability to control your urges.

Other than that, i dont know any other way to go about it, and i dont know why ur not getting further.

Oh, and maybe you shouldnt say "I'll call you later". Dont talk about the future with these girls. Let them wonder if you'll ever call them again, or else you'll just keep giving away your power.

 

[Dongfu]

she's like a solid 9.5.

See my post about rating women. Then post a picture of this 9.5 and see what everyone else thinks.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=130965

Get a free copy of my book, since you mentioned closing the deal. You should find some related useful info regarding the closing phase

 

[The Inside Man]

Drop the guitar hero schtick and stop asking name and number for facebook, go for the phone number. Remember, always be closing...Try to kiss close at parties too, just get closer to the girl during conversation until you are in their personal space. If she likes it she'll get closer to you to and voila. But at least try going for the number close and calling the next day to set something up. I like to call either the same day or next day, waiting a few days is not a good idea imo. Keep up the good work though!

 

[L777]

See my post about rating women. Then post a picture of this 9.5 and see what everyone else thinks.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=130965

Get a free copy of my book, since you mentioned closing the deal. You should find some related useful info regarding the closing phase

Cheers mate, real helpful.

Ask any of my friends what I consider to be a 10, and they'd all tell you Eva Mendes and J-Lo. This girls looks like Eva Mendes' twin....thus she's my 9.5


Edit: my bad I didn't read the last bit....thanks for that, wheres this book? But anyway...she really is that hot and I know I'm punching above my weight....but its possible, I now know that. I actually have her on facebook but I'm not gonna do that, its disrespectful. Pictures are lame anyway. I look like a model in some and a bum in others. You need to see this girl in her underwear to appreciate it anyway....seriously, flawless body.

 

[Interceptor]

Something you are doing is coming across as not confident or needy in some way.

You are communicating something "unsure" about yourself.

You're disconnecting during the intimacy, she's not 'feeling it' with you.

Perhaps the way you're touching her?
Perhaps you are too quiet?
Perhaps you are too pushy?
Perhaps you don't know how to tease her?
perhaps something as silly (but very important) as bad breath? Or body odor? unclean teeth? That sort of thing.


You seem to be cracking at the crucial moments, and it's killing the mood.

You haven't described your place.
Are there other people there?

Are you sure you have PRIVACY?

Are there certain personal objects that would perhaps be perceived as unflattering to you?


Are you sure you are coming across as a sexual, confident, masculine Man? All the time? No matter what she does or says??????

Just some questions, dude...

 

[L777]

Something you are doing is coming across as not confident or needy in some way.

You are communicating something "unsure" about yourself.

You're disconnecting during the intimacy, she's not 'feeling it' with you.

Perhaps the way you're touching her?
Perhaps you are too quiet?
Perhaps you are too pushy?
Perhaps you don't know how to tease her?
perhaps something as silly (but very important) as bad breath? Or body odor? unclean teeth? That sort of thing.


You seem to be cracking at the crucial moments, and it's killing the mood.

You haven't described your place.
Are there other people there?

Are you sure you have PRIVACY?

Are there certain personal objects that would perhaps be perceived as unflattering to you?


Are you sure you are coming across as a sexual, confident, masculine Man? All the time? No matter what she does or says??????

Just some questions, dude...

Thanks. Well my place is crap, I share a room with someone, but he's at his chick's house on the weekends. Its the cheapest room on campus. I think it may be that Im too pushy, but I'm having conflicting advice here. On one hand, some ppl say, tease, let her initiate it etc, and then there's ppl like Gunwitch who say try over and over and over.

I mean, I always do it GW and its worked a lot of times, but its not worked a lot of times as well. Is there a way to gauge how I should play it/ Go fast/slow etc.

 

[Dongfu]

Cheers mate, real helpful.

Ask any of my friends what I consider to be a 10, and they'd all tell you Eva Mendes and J-Lo. This girls looks like Eva Mendes' twin....thus she's my 9.5


Edit: my bad I didn't read the last bit....thanks for that, wheres this book? But anyway...she really is that hot and I know I'm punching above my weight....but its possible, I now know that. I actually have her on facebook but I'm not gonna do that, its disrespectful. Pictures are lame anyway. I look like a model in some and a bum in others. You need to see this girl in her underwear to appreciate it anyway....seriously, flawless body.

sounds good, and yes, it would be uncool to put her pic up w/out her permission. I thought about posting some of my "clients" but there's no need. If she's a 9.5 to you, thats all that matters

pm me your email for the book. It'l take me a minute to get it out though.