"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Of erections, proms, and jealousy.

Maeisgood

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Thanks for the advice, but is it really that straightforward a question? Do you have to call it a "date" for it to be a "date" and does that mean that you are officially "dating" and boyfriend or girlfriend? I've done things with girls but never called them "dates" I've just been like "hey, I'm doing ___ you should come with me."

Luckily the college I'm going to is mostly female, but I want to try my luck with this one.

I do like the idea of asking one out that I'm not that into because news will travel very fast and she'll find out and I can practice.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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chill

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hes right. its not always the best thing to call it a date. it can be kind of intimidating and limiting. they feel that by accepting that they have to be your GF. How would you feel if you HAD to be someones BF. see what I mean?
 

Cloud-uk

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Woh! Hang on a second. At some point you have to make the girl 'know' what's up. If you go through the whole macking routine but avoid letting her know you're into her in a "wooo shag" kind of way, you're headed for a new friend and blue balls,

Ok, if you're looking sharp, have self-confidence, and can articulate to a girl and make her feel good;

And if she is receptive and flirty back to you;

Go for it.

Find her and ask for a date, if she says no she was sending the wrong signals and it's her fault. Then you jsut next and find a girl who can play the game properly.

Best of luck.
 

Maeisgood

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I kinda did go on a date with her, but she brought a little kid with her and the little girl and the little girl was all climbing on me, punching me in the bottom, and playing. Me being good with children is probably a good thing. She was probably jealous. It made for some funny situations. Then I went back to her place and had dinner with her and her mom. I'm in the friend-zone with them it seems. I should have left far earlier because if I stay around her too long she just gets tired. If I left, it would have seemed that I was avoiding her though.

Then last night she wanted to hang out (but I think it was because my parents were gone). She came over with her friend but I didn't let more over because I don't want a crazy party to get busted. She sort of made a tiny bit of fun of her boyfriend and complained a little about him. Then some other guy, a friend of mine called her, and then we went to meet up with him. Sadly, my friends are more ****blockers than wingmen. I hate that. Something horrible happened though. I drank too much of something and I threw up (a distance away, they may not have even seen it). That seems shameful. How do I play that off if they did see it?

Another issue though, Lauren showed me scars on her wrist and said she used to cut herself. I was so shocked. I don't understand borderline personalities at all, and she seemed like the last person who would do that. I suppose she's more appearance than I thought. Why would a chick show me something so shameful and embarassing?
 

familyguyfan

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Originally posted by Maeisgood
I drank too much of something and I threw up (a distance away, they may not have even seen it). That seems shameful. How do I play that off if they did see it?
Usually not that big of a deal. I wouldn't even bother trying to play it off like it didn't happen. She drinks too, and she obviously knows that people throw up when they drink too much. None of the girls I know think anything of it when a guy throws up from drinking because they do it too. They may think it's gross when it happens, but other than that they don't care.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Cloud-uk

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Originally posted by Maeisgood
I should have left far earlier because if I stay around her too long she just gets tired. If I left, it would have seemed that I was avoiding her though...

Another issue though, Lauren showed me scars on her wrist and said she used to cut herself. I was so shocked. I don't understand borderline personalities at all, and she seemed like the last person who would do that. I suppose she's more appearance than I thought. Why would a chick show me something so shameful and embarassing?
1) If you had ditched her it would have shown that you have a life that doesn't revolve arround her, and it would put you in demand. Yes, you should have left.

2) First, she's shoing it to you becasue she sees you as a friend. It ain't happeneing here mate. Secondly what the hell is this "shameful" crap? I get the vibe you think she 'SHOULD' be embarrissed about self-harming- in which case you're just a muppet. You put way to much weight on the opinions of others and until you sort that out you'll only get ass out of blind luck.
 

Maeisgood

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I think I should plan things with other girls, and then try to find out when her boyfriend is leaving. Every now and then, plan something with Lauren, but always plan a reason to leave.

When he is finally gone, how should I get her before summer ends?

No one else has been shown the scars, but "friends" can be changed into more.
 

Maeisgood

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False signals.

1) What can be said of girls who seem to talk and flirt with everyone? Most girls that I know, even those with boyfriends seem to talk, flirt, and smile at everyone. It doesn't really mean that they are s1utty, but it makes it hard to tell whether or not they are giving you the signal to go for the question.

2) What are the requirements to making an outting with a lady an official "date"?
 
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