"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Odd situation, what would u have done ?

Wiesman44

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So I'm hooking up / seeing this girl. Only been with her since Last Thursday, but we've hung out 4x since then.

I noticed she has a very dominant personality. Friends with a lot of people, very sociable, typical sh#t like that.

I like to believe that I got her interested in me, b/c first time I met her I acted very confidently, very alpha.

I bet 75% was my looks, and 25% was my personality.

I've been seeing her more and more, and I've never experienced a girl with such a dominant personality before. I was at work today and I thought about it, and I realized she was turning me into some insecure, chump. She would criticize something, half-jokingly and I would constantly find myself justifying my actions instead of saying, you know what, "fu#k it, I am how I am".

I started to believe she was turning me into an insecure chump around her. So i called her up, and I said, in a friendly, half-serious voice, "u know, you've basically been turning me into an insecure chump as of late, and I dont like it. I'm not going to let that sh#t happen". Now keep in mind my tone wasn't all serious and demanding, and she thought it was somewhat funny, but didn't have any clue what I was talking about, though I could have sworn she did".

Now, in hindsight, I shouldn't have said anything b/c she didnt believe i was being insecure.

She ended by saying "you're just trying to be cute and coy with me b/c I'm so wonderful that you can't not talking to me for one day"

I ended with a c + F "there ya go tryin' to pad the ol' ego again"


Should I have told her that i am not gonna act like a loser anymore ?


My reasoning was as follows: If i didnt tell her i was gonna change my insecure crap, she'd gradually lose interest.

If i did tell her I was not gonna let her suck me into an insecure loser, she'd see how I'm the man and am not going to let myself be sucked in.

I've never had a problem with a woman so dominant before, what would u all do ?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Jake-inator

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She ended by saying
"you're just trying to be cute and coy with me b/c I'm so wonderful that you can't not talking to me for one day"
This girl reads the bible more than you...


I ended with a c + F "there ya go tryin' to pad the ol' ego again"
You call that C+F??

Well if u mean Chump + Frustration then yes...

And my personal favorite...

Should I have told her that i am not gonna act like a loser anymore ?
If i did tell her I was not gonna let her suck me into an insecure loser, she'd see how I'm the man and am not going to let myself be sucked in.
:crackup:

As MOM would say "You're so insecure that even a blind man can see it."


How would i have responded to that?

"Well I am cute but we'll just see about the other part..."
 
Last edited:

Wiesman44

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Your just an idiot. If your not going to respond with helpful posts, don't bother.


The last line was good. Seeing as though she laughed at it, I dont have anything wrong with it.


I'm a very confident guy. I pull a lot of chicks. I never said i was 'so insecure'. I said i thought about it, reflecting back on the past few days, and it seemed like I was acting insecure. Seeing as though she didn't even notice it, i guess it was all in my head, eh ?

the loser part that you responded to, I just used different words. I wouldnt actually tell her i wont act like a 'loser'. I just used that word b/c i typed it up quickly.

If you've just joined this site, I don't want your opinion. You are worthless to me. Expert dj's, and guys that have been around here a while, if you found yourself thinking your slipping into insecurity, would u have called her on it ?
 

darthsidious

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i love your attitude, it's full of fear...a true dj is not fearful

now open your mouth for some sperm!

feel the force
 

Wiesman44

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its funny darth, every single of one your posts have been a Star Wars 3 reference, and have helped nobody. I sit here and respond to more people's problems than I post problems of my own.


I might as well just request this thread to be closed. I request some advice as to what I should have done, and I have Jake telling me I'm the biggest AFC on earth, and I have Darth Sidious telling me to join the freakin' dark side.


Good one guys, keep up the good work.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

Jake-inator

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Yes, but he brought laughter to the hearts of many. The only thing you offer is AFC advice.

LOL Darth... keep those star wars jokes coming.
 

So Many Ways

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She would criticize something, half-jokingly and I would constantly find myself justifying my actions instead of saying, you know what, "fu#k it, I am how I am"
You don't need to justify your actions to a woman ever. If she doesn't like it, too bad. Justifying yourself is a mistake.

"u know, you've basically been turning me into an insecure chump as of late, and I dont like it. I'm not going to let that sh#t happen".
You might as well make a sign in big bold letters and give it to her stating

YOU NOW HAVE MY NUTS IN YOUR POCKET .

Also you're letting her affect how you perceive yourself. Why? Your sense of self shouldn't be based on females or female approval.

She ended by saying "you're just trying to be cute and coy with me b/c I'm so wonderful that you can't not talking to me for one day"
She knows she's in control.

There's no need to tell her that you're going to act like a man. Just do it.

What would I do? Well dominant personality types turn me off so that's a situation I try to avoid, but when I've had women challenge me or cop attitude or things like that, I check them. There's really no other way to handle it, check them and keep doing what you're doing or walk away. I used to be scared to check a broad, but when I actually did it, usually they get turned on.

What you did however is the worst thing you can possibly do.

"Survey says it's estimated that 9 out of 10 men don't check they spouse
But Suga Free will tell your pretty ass to get the f*ck out" -- Suga Free
 

bud_2005

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"u know, you've basically been turning me into an insecure chump as of late, and I dont like it. I'm not going to let that sh#t happen".


NEVER SAY THAT TO A GIRL AGAIN!!
 

B-Lemond

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The obvious answer is to act more dominant than her. Just learn from her cause she obviously has GAME and use that against her. Like when she said that you just can't not talk to her for one day. She might have more game than you. Plus, you have to admit to yourself that making that phone call was useless. It just made you look worse. Plus I bet she laughed on purpose to your "ego" joke. Wouldn't you laugh at some girl if she said that to you? Well maybe you wouldn't if you were big chumpin.
 
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