OCD and Anxiety

[The Purifier]

Anybody on here struggle with OCD and Anxiety? I have a very bad case and I have been struggling for years. I think it has been affecting my relationships as well and when I go out with women.

I've been to therapists and have taken medications but nothing has helped. Sometimes, I feel so depressed and lonely because nobody has helped me. I stopped seeing therapists and taking the meds because nothing has worked.

Recently, I have been in a couple relationships and my OCD and anxiety made me feel miserable. I had a long distance relationship with this woman from another country for 6 months...She was a good person but I was always worried about what she was doing, where she was, who she was with...She never did anything wrong. I couldn't handle the situation at all and I felt miserable everyday. If she didn't message me in the mornings, I was a wreck.

This isn't because I'm a beta...It's due to my mental illness. I know these things aren't good to do but I can't control myself. Please don't call me names or say I'm beta...I have mental illnesses that affect my life.

Currently, I'm in a friends with benefits "relationship" with a woman that is almost 20 years older than me. She's pretty hot and but I know she is too old for me....The problem is I'm attached to her now because of my OCD and I'm obsessing about her. I think about her all the time and I am infatuated with her. She told me she isn't ready for a relationship now because her life is crazy...Her situation in this country is unstable and she has many problems...I probably shouldn't be involved with someone like this but the sex is AMAZING. The sex with her is AMAZING. The problem is my anxiety...I can't handle the situation like a normal person could without OCD....I feel nauseous and I feel sick to my stomach....I don't have an appetite and it's hard to eat. I lost a couple pounds...not much but still. I feel like I am obsessed with her. If I write her and she sees my messages, and doesn't reply...I feel horrible...I feel nervous that she might meet someone else....

She's 50 years old...Technically, still married...even though she separately many years ago...has a daughter that is a young adult....Old enough for me to go out with haha. But her daugher lives in another country. She is insecure about the age difference too...She always tells me she feels like people will think she's my mother because I look very young for my age...So I have to grow a beard haha. It's her first time with a younger guy and my first with a woman her age....Her friends always ask her...who is this young guy and she says we are friends.


Honestly, I don't know what to do...I could either accept the friends with benefits and try so hard to control my OCD, or see if she will want a serious relationship even though I don't think it's a good idea because she is too old for me anyway and she isn't ready for that yet.....Or I can stop seeing her and talking to her altogether and never see her again or talk to her again...Those are the only 3 options I see....


I really wish I could overcome this OCD and anxiety and handle the situation and enjoy the sex and companionship but I just don't know what to do...

Any advice would be helpful.. Thanks.

 

[Epic Days]

What are you OCD about? New bar of soap every time you wash your hands?
Close and open the door ten times? Check the locks on your door three times before going to bed?

 

[The Purifier]

Did you read my story? It has different forms...Sometimes it's germs...and now it's with women....The way I obsess about them and who I am seeing and become infatuated.

 

[Epic Days]

Did you read my story? It has different forms...Sometimes it's germs...and now it's with women....The way I obsess about them and who I am seeing and become infatuated.

I read it. This has more data in a usable way. First off you don’t have OCD. You are creating problems. You don’t have a disability so stop trying to find one and/or create one to use to not confront your life and existence.

You’re not suffering from anything that most people don’t suffer from. Your thoughts and mind aren’t controlled properly. You have conflicts between you and your mind. Try knocking it off.

 

[Spaz]

I'm guessing you're an American.

Because most of the mental health issues is being brought up by Americans - consistently.

It's either the American culture is too toxic or its simply a case of over reporting/diagnosed.

But that doesn't really matter, what matters is that u r unhappy.

How do we then diagnose unhappiness?

Perhaps psychologist has multiple names or categories for it and for good order calls it mental illness.

But better yet, ask urself, how did you get into this mess in the 1st place?

At least think abt it.

 

[Robert28]

As someone that doesn’t have anxiety or depression, I did date a girl for 7 months that had both. I don’t think they were being treated either so you talk about a roller coaster. Never again will I ever date someone with either of those things, I don’t understand them and being around her I felt my mental health slipping because her depression was bringing ME down. She refused to get help either.

 

[The Purifier]

I read it. This has more data in a usable way. First off you don’t have OCD. You are creating problems. You don’t have a disability so stop trying to find one and/or create one to use to not confront your life and existence.

You’re not suffering from anything that most people don’t suffer from. Your thoughts and mind aren’t controlled properly. You have conflicts between you and your mind. Try knocking it off.

So the answer is just stop what I'm doing? I feel like my anxiety is controlling me...I can't handle this situation well. Obviously, something is affecting me in a negative way because if it's affecting my health, my desire to eat, and I keep thinking about this woman....Something is off.

 

[Epic Days]

So the answer is just stop what I'm doing? I feel like my anxiety is controlling me...I can't handle this situation well. Obviously, something is affecting me in a negative way because if it's affecting my health, my desire to eat, and I keep thinking about this woman....Something is off.

There isn’t a man on here who hasn’t had a woman at some point that they can’t stop thinking about. In the most consuming ways. You are not different or special. It’s called living and learning.
You will really blow your lid when you realize that she triggered you on purpose because she was exposing your weaknesses.

There’s a lot for you to learn here.