Obvious signs of BPD?

[SoSuaveDude]

What are the signs and cautious symptoms/red flags often found in these women?

 

[Acq]

the first and most obvious sign is : something is off, if it appears so, trust your gut, there IS something wrong with her.
When I encounter girls who appear to be a little strange I usually ask about her parents and her upbringing, in a friendly joking manner. ANY BPD will tell u a dramatic story about her dad or mom or both being either abusive, emotionally or physically, or emotionally absent.


all other signs can be found on wikipedia or other sources.

 

[st_99]

ask about her parents and her upbringing

Everything Acq said is exactly correct, especially about the parents.

When you've dealt with one or two your sixth sense kicks in and you just
know something is off.

The last BPD girl I knew for about a year and from about the 2nd month (did not bang her yet) just sensed something was not right even though she came across as just a normal, quiet, nice, sweat girl. Crazy how your gut just knows.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Everything is all or nothing, she hates it or loves it. This includes you. And that opinion changes. When she loves you, she's like a $10,000 per night escort. When she hates you, she will destroy your life, which you obviously deserve, because you are now the worst person in the world. You may have been the world's greatest guy yesterday, but that is now irrelevant.

 

[PokerInTheRear]

Hot/Cold or Push/Pull

 

[Borknagar]

The fact she has a vagina

 

[Atom Smasher]

The fact she has a vagina

:yes:

 

[Die Hard]

It'd be easier if you just described the girl who you suspect of being BPD. We'll tell you if she is or isn't. But honestly, if you suspect her to be BPD, that probably means you have enough reason to 'next' her already...

 

[SoSuaveDude]

Okay, well the girl im suspicious of:

-> is really sweet
-> a virgin
-> will/has spend money on me
-> hasn't shown hate or anger towards me ever
-> wants to be exclusive with me
-> not suicidal (like some bpds)

However she:

-> approached me about getting in a relationship, but when i take things to the next level, she sometimes pulls away.
-> has trust issues
-> claims she's still finding herself at 23
-> besides the trust issue thing, says she is seeking a serious relationship
-> does drink, but without getting drunk...

The biggest thing that scares me is when she admitted that most of her past relationships failed due to her becoming sometimes randomly distant.

Does it sound like a BPD, or a chick with major trust issues?

 

[PokerInTheRear]

Okay, well the girl im suspicious of:

-> is really sweet
-> a virgin
-> will/has spend money on me
-> hasn't shown hate or anger towards me ever
-> wants to be exclusive with me
-> not suicidal (like some bpds)

However she:

-> approached me about getting in a relationship, but when i take things to the next level, she sometimes pulls away.
-> has trust issues
-> claims she's still finding herself at 23
-> besides the trust issue thing, says she is seeking a serious relationship
-> does drink, but without getting drunk...

The biggest thing that scares me is when she admitted that most of her past relationships failed due to her becoming sometimes distant.

Does it sound like a BPD, or a chick with major trust issues?

Sounds like every woman I ever known... not bpd.

 

[The Assistant]

what would compel you to take this kind of woman seriously? (BPD or not)

Just use her for the piece of azz that she is, have fun with her, tell her what she needs to hear, and use her to gain some overall experience

Whatever you do, do NOT commit.

Save commitment ONLY for women who are literally perfect in every way in your eyes (perfect in all the areas that count, such as attitude, personality, looks, sexually)

 

[horaholic]

Okay, well the girl im suspicious of:

-> is really sweet
-> a virgin
-> will/has spend money on me
-> hasn't shown hate or anger towards me ever
-> wants to be exclusive with me
-> not suicidal (like some bpds)

However she:

-> approached me about getting in a relationship, but when i take things to the next level, she sometimes pulls away.
-> has trust issues
-> claims she's still finding herself at 23
-> besides the trust issue thing, says she is seeking a serious relationship
-> does drink, but without getting drunk...

The biggest thing that scares me is when she admitted that most of her past relationships failed due to her becoming sometimes randomly distant.

Does it sound like a BPD, or a chick with major trust issues?

WTF is wrong with you? I'd kill for a girl with those 'issues'!

Read the BPD threads, for Christ's sake! Where's the part where she dumps you for no reason, then begs for you back, while having a guy 'friend' over at her house? Where's the part where she fakes serious medical conditions, and/or convinces you she's dying? Where's the part where you find out her whole life story to you was totally fabricated? Where's the part where her 'stalker' breaks down your door and tries to take your life? how about five years down the road after you dump her where she STILL manages to convince you of her lies? How about her making up nonsense to fight with you, and ending up with other men?

Stop insulting those of us who've had a REAL bpd in our life! 'Trust issues.' Oooohhh. What a psycho! You better count your fvcking blessings, little boy!

Talk to us when you find out your 'virgin' has starred in gangbang porn, before you talk to us.

 

[Poonani Maker]

I've encountered/befriended a few bpds, male and female, in my lifetime. They appear to be superhuman most of the time. Excellent artists. One was a best friend growing up - very skilled guitarist (industrial bands = very technical playing). He used to try to get me to refill hydrocodone prescriptions from the dentist for him. Another was a 50 year old weightlifting friend who used to call me his protege, spot me, give advice on music, weightlifting, etc etc. He could recite the entire works of Shakespeare...all of Romeo and Juliet from memory. He had a photographic memory - genetic, not learned. When his mom died, I didn't see him for months. He went into a Deep, deep withdrawal or depression. He told me about his meds: lithium, zanax (sp?), ect. Another just recently is a 22 yr old hottie mom of 2 I fvcked 4 weeks ago. She is still unconfirmed, but I know not of another woman, in MY lifetime, who could achieve feats of fvcking as she did with me that night. She gripped me so hard, and pulled me into her fvcking so hard, it was just fvcking fantastic to give it to a woman who Wants you to give it to her so hard. She Loves sex, but is sooo cute and young, you'd think that she would be fragile and not in to such hard fvcking. I'm almost convinced she's manic depressive. Her sex was super-human. That's bpd in a nutshell. What appears to be super-human feats of artistic expression, but coupled with long bouts with depression. They're performers, excellent actors, straight-A students if need be. They're quite impressive, and everybody else is stupid but them, so they think.

 

[Uberguy]

Okay, well the girl im suspicious of:

-> is really sweet
-> a virgin
-> will/has spend money on me
-> hasn't shown hate or anger towards me ever
-> wants to be exclusive with me
-> not suicidal (like some bpds)

However she:

-> approached me about getting in a relationship, but when i take things to the next level, she sometimes pulls away.
-> has trust issues
-> claims she's still finding herself at 23
-> besides the trust issue thing, says she is seeking a serious relationship
-> does drink, but without getting drunk...

The biggest thing that scares me is when she admitted that most of her past relationships failed due to her becoming sometimes randomly distant.

Does it sound like a BPD, or a chick with major trust issues?

That sounds less like BPD and more like 23. Mind you, she might still be a flake, and she might not be the best person to trust, but it's more likely to be an age thing than a mental disorder.

Here are other signs she has BPD:

-She wants to have really rough sex with you to the point at which you're beating her. If you don't punch/strangle/throw her hard enough against the wall, she calls you a *****. Then the next morning, she accuses you of rape.

-She hates her father. She loves her father. You're such a better man than he was. You'll never be as much of a man as he was. And when she spontaneously starts calling you 'Daddy' while having sex, she'll break down crying.

-You wake up in the middle of the night to her punching you. After you physically restrain her, you ask her what the hell she's doing. She tells you she's mad at you because she had a dream that you cheated on her, and she won't let you get away with it.

-She's a perfect 10 in bed...and a -86 in sanity.

 

[Borknagar]

When you really look into things, almost every chick out there can be diagnosed with even a slight form of BPD or some other mental disorder. The women had have no trace of mental issues are married or in quite successful relationships by the time their in their early 20s

 

[PimpOfTheSouth]

I would agree that most women have some kind of BPD.

 

[Borknagar]

They do but even a slight form of BPD is only part of it. I took a psychology class, and when I started looking at metal disorders and things like delusions, mood disorders, and what not and I was like wow, the amount of women that fit some kind of psychological that I met is near 100% in the age groups of 18-35

 

[PimpOfTheSouth]

Yes I would have to agree especially with some of the younger girls these days. I have seen some pretty extreme cases before especially my ex. She was crazy, Happy one moment and then the next raising hell.

 

[Die Hard]

-> is really sweet
-> a virgin
-> will/has spend money on me
-> hasn't shown hate or anger towards me ever
-> wants to be exclusive with me
-> not suicidal (like some bpds)

However she:

-> approached me about getting in a relationship, but when i take things to the next level, she sometimes pulls away.
-> has trust issues
-> claims she's still finding herself at 23
-> besides the trust issue thing, says she is seeking a serious relationship
-> does drink, but without getting drunk...

The biggest thing that scares me is when she admitted that most of her past relationships failed due to her becoming sometimes randomly distant.

This description alone doesn't give much reason to think she's BPD, but of course that doesn't neccesarily mean she is not BPD.

BPD's mostly start to show "sicker" behaviour as you get to know them longer and better...they appear perfectly normal until you get to know them better. Also, lots of women have "trust issues" to some degree but when it's bad enough (and I think this applies to your girl), it's called 'commitment phobia'. There's a pretty high overlap between girls who have commitment phobia and girls who are BPD...

Anyway, whether she's BPD or not, the fact that she has pretty serious trust issues is a big red flag. She will show mood swings and she will suddenly become distant like she described from her earlier relationships. Not probably, but for sure! Just a matter of time... It will happen when you least expect it and hit you out of nothing. This behaviour will mess with your mind and you'll end up getting hurt, unless you can keep your emotions for her in check. Which I'm pretty sure you can't, unless you start spinning more plates right now...

The moment you're becoming emotionally attached to her (which already happened, right? You're thinking of her when she's not there, projecting hopes and fantasies onto her about how things will be between the two of you etc.), you should eject. Otherwise, you'll be in for a rough ride...

 

[AAAgent]

I'm pretty sure by the time you notice obvious signs you're already in over you're head.

no daddy/daddy issues
sexual abuse
you catch her lying to you about her past/present
lied about being a virgin but till this day she tells everyone i'm her first. she will lie to the death.

Obviously she was perfect in the beginning. Sweet, cute, hard to get, a virgin, few boyfriends, great to her older brothers, clumsy and forgetful, etc.

she turned out to not be a virgin...no blood and not super tight like one should be. Had like 6+boyfriends and other sh1t when she told me i was her second, mood swings with her brothers who were also crazy, and who knows what else.

Mine had all these fake friends that weren't truly her friend. She also tried to PLEASE everyone. She had a problem with people not liking her so she would tell sob stories to everyone and try to make her life horrible so people would care for her.