"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Now I am confused

SynapsyS

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There's no need to ignore her, just don't pay attention to her.

Trying to ignore her is just going to make the whole thing more and more awkward. The best thing to do is not consciously ignore her, but focus your attention on something/someone else instead. And if you do see her, just treat her like a stranger.

Easier said than done? Not really.

I didn't think i'd see it here, but you're basically me a year and a half ago. Let's just say, i'm glad i'm not that person any more.

Syn.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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The Comeback Kid

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Originally posted by SynapsyS
There's no need to ignore her, just don't pay attention to her.

Trying to ignore her is just going to make the whole thing more and more awkward. The best thing to do is not consciously ignore her, but focus your attention on something/someone else instead. And if you do see her, just treat her like a stranger.

Easier said than done? Not really.

I didn't think i'd see it here, but you're basically me a year and a half ago. Let's just say, i'm glad i'm not that person any more.

Syn.
ok - I meant more what you said "focusing your attention elsewhere" than ignoring her...my wording wasn't exactly right.
 

SynapsyS

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I saw her (with eye contact) and was thinking "d'oh!" It was inevitable that we would have to acknowledge each other, or else it would have looked pretty bad in front of some other people, even if I was trying to "ignore" her.
You were trying to ignore her.

Stop making excuses.

Move on.

Stop being an AFC.

Kthx.
 

The Comeback Kid

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Originally posted by SynapsyS
You were trying to ignore her.

Stop making excuses.

Move on.

Stop being an AFC.

Kthx.
I think we JUST went over this - I had mis-worded my intention on this post. You said 2 posts ago that I had said ignored. What I SHOULD have said was "trying to treat her just like any other person."

And I betr you get every girl too Synapsys, right? Right?
 

Stinky Booky

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just from readen da first few things she likes you and all but she wants to get to know u a whole lot more than she knows but she sounds like she is tryin to play hard to get, basicly means u know they gona make u work ur ass off to get to go out with them. but i didn't finish it all so i really cant say nothing
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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SynapsyS

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Originally posted by The Comeback Kid
I think we JUST went over this - I had mis-worded my intention on this post. You said 2 posts ago that I had said ignored. What I SHOULD have said was "trying to treat her just like any other person."

And I betr you get every girl too Synapsys, right? Right?
Hey, don't start insulting me. "Ignore" is so completely different to "Trying to treat her just like any other person" that I think you're just going into damage control.

For the last time, stop posting about this girl. The next post you make had better be a field report, otherwise the whole board will think you're lame as all hell.

Now go out and start being awesome :)

Syn.
 

The Comeback Kid

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Originally posted by bluelemond
update?
haha update.

I was able to break the awkwardness, so that's good. We talked about colleges before the football game Friday (I was announcing again, as usual) and we talked a little in class today. I did show her, along with many other people the large red scapes on my back for taking a nasty spill on the track today in the 60-meter dash for gym (I lost balance cuz I was leaning foward a little too much for the speed I was going at, flipped over 3 times, landed square on my back and everyone thought I was real hurt after the flips, but I felt/was fine). Not to worry, the girl didn't see my actually fall. At least everyone "oooed" and "ahhed" at the scrapes lol. For the girls, I preferred to call them "battle scars."

So pretty much, I still talk to the girl and things are alright. There doesn't seem to really be any awkwardness anymore and things are back to normal. However, I am scouting the scene for other girls...
 
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The Comeback Kid

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just bumping in case anyone wanted to read it. I know Bluelemond asked for an update on this.

As I metioned in this "update", the awkardness is gone and everything is going fine. I found out today I make it into some program (VAASA) that she made last year, so I can talk to her about that and we will have to go to meetings and all that.

I'm still looking for some other girls to "get to know better." I already have Senior Prom (which is in June) in my mind...
 
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