So I guess I made the "mistake" of giving a girl advice, I told her that she shouldnt fear rejection and the only person youre rejecting is yourself. She then exploded on me saying "its not that easy" "congrats on living in your perfect world" etc... I managed to get with this girl a few weeks earlier maybe shes just bitter she cant do it? lol.
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
note to self: never give girls advice
- Thread starter mtlwlu
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"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
The mistake you made is not giving a female advice, but how you gave the advice. It sounds like the girl your dealing with is a bit emotional about the topic yal were discussing, and you have to be very sensitive to those who react defensively with emotions. The same piece of advice does not work for every person. Different people may need different explanations. You need to consider the person your dealing with and construct an argument that coincides with the person's learning style as well as getting the point across. I personally favor the socratic method in which you teach a person with questions.
Most importantly, giving advice to females is certainly not a mistake. I will say that it is a risk, but we all know that luck favors the brave.
Most importantly, giving advice to females is certainly not a mistake. I will say that it is a risk, but we all know that luck favors the brave.
Many guys need to learn that when a girl asks for advice or tells you about her problems, she just wants you to listen. As a DJ, you don't want to be an emotional tampon for her (by listening to her whining), but at the same time, it is good to listen ocasionally to not appear cold hearted. That's right LISTEN, don't say anything unless she asks or makes it seem like she is waiting for a response.
Than again, this view is biased, I'm a bit more of a moralled DJ.
Than again, this view is biased, I'm a bit more of a moralled DJ.
dannyegg4575
Senior Don Juan
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DonS, what's your response if she asks you what you think?
"That's a tough one, what do you think about it?"dannyegg4575 said:DonS, what's your response if she asks you what you think?
I tend to answer back with another question, you can't go wrong with that. She would continue to talk about what she thinks of it, and than you would go back to what I originally stated to do: Just sit there, and listen.
So long as she doesn't keep on coming back to you and spilling all her problems as if you are her therapist/emotional tampon, there is nothing wrong.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
WC2
Master Don Juan
DonS is right on when he says that giving your opinion is not the same as giving advice.
Giving a woman your opinion is a very manly thing to do. It shows that you have beliefs and you live by them. As long as your living your life to the fullest the way you should, your opinion should be a good one that not only gives her insight, but also shows her that you have a solid base.
Once you start giving "advice" however, you are putting yourself in the line of fire. Proceed with caution. If she doesn't like the advice, she will question it. If she does like the advice, she will still question it. It's like a big trap to fall into a girl's emotional drama.
Stay above the drama and leave it with what you personally believe. You're not telling her to do anything. You're not putting yourself in the middle of a sh!tstorm.
Once you've given your opinion, get out. Stop talking about negative things. Stay positive. Talk about fun things. It's great to show a woman that you have a deeper side, but only for a moment. Keep things upbeat and fun.
Giving a woman your opinion is a very manly thing to do. It shows that you have beliefs and you live by them. As long as your living your life to the fullest the way you should, your opinion should be a good one that not only gives her insight, but also shows her that you have a solid base.
Once you start giving "advice" however, you are putting yourself in the line of fire. Proceed with caution. If she doesn't like the advice, she will question it. If she does like the advice, she will still question it. It's like a big trap to fall into a girl's emotional drama.
Stay above the drama and leave it with what you personally believe. You're not telling her to do anything. You're not putting yourself in the middle of a sh!tstorm.
Once you've given your opinion, get out. Stop talking about negative things. Stay positive. Talk about fun things. It's great to show a woman that you have a deeper side, but only for a moment. Keep things upbeat and fun.
It is a waste of time giving logical advice to females and expecting to see any positive results. Either they'll agree but never apply, or they'll just disagree with no apparent reasoning.
Nothing wrong with it though. Doesn't stop you from getting any play and it does make conversation. I usually don't hand out advice though because I generally got tired of hearing them talk about other men. I just tell him, "I don't really like talking about other guys but I'm sure your girlfriends would be able to give you some great advice." or something along those lines. Be a gentleman about it.
Nothing wrong with it though. Doesn't stop you from getting any play and it does make conversation. I usually don't hand out advice though because I generally got tired of hearing them talk about other men. I just tell him, "I don't really like talking about other guys but I'm sure your girlfriends would be able to give you some great advice." or something along those lines. Be a gentleman about it.