Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Not Sh*t Tests, Think Gambling

EyeOnThePrize

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Sh*t tests imply a woman is some kind of authority to appease, that you must 'pass' or 'fail' their tests.
This mentality is too limiting and warped.

Instead think of yourself as a casino(the house) and women as gamblers.
As the house you control the outcome of every bet.
Red is rooted in love and giving, black is rooted in fear and lack.
The money is respect.
Women should always win when they bet on red and always lose when they bet on black.

You will only pay out(respect) the women that consistently take the risk to bet on red(love).
You will impoverish(check/dismiss) the women that are foolish enough to consistently bet on black(lack/hate).


When she bets on red:
-She makes plans and invites you somewhere well in advance
-She comes over to treat you
-She compliments you in front of others
-She supports your endeavors and shows her faith in you as the leader
She is risking her money(her respect) on the idea of love. You should reward her risky bet with admiration and affection. Confirm her belief.
Pay out so that she is encouraged to bet even bigger on red.

Do not take her bets on red for granted. Paying out these bets is VITAL to an ideal relationship.
If you do not payout when she bets on love, she will be discouraged from continuing to bet on red. It will feel one sided to her and she will wonder why she's betting on love at all. She may stop taking care of herself or otherwise become bored or frustrated that she can not please you. When you consistently reinforce good behavior she will come to treat you as a god and keep herself looking like a goddess for you.

When she bets on black:
-She tries to put you down in front of others
-She takes your things without asking
-She doesn't respond in a timely manner
-She is not accountable for her mistakes or responsibilities
She is risking her money(her respect) on the idea of hate/fear. She is hoping you will submit to her, that you will pay her out, but you never will. You will call her bluff, stand up for yourself, and she will lose her bet money(you will dismiss her). She will be encouraged to lower her bet size until she stops betting on black.

Sometimes a woman who has been winning on black will double down. You will call out her bad behavior and she will try to twist it back on you or to upset you. If you call her bluff again she may double down again and again until she is betting all your respect for her(her money) over a marble. You should disengage(burn her bet), and dismiss her until she starts redeeming herself with healthy bets. Notice there is no doubling down when she bets on red, because she wins, another reason you MUST payout on every red bet.

We focus a lot on what to do when she bets on black because many men are nice, they let things slide, until they are brainwashed. This is not taking her bet money. This is telling her that she can bet on black as many times as she wants. Instead calmly but sternly make it known that she has lost some of your respect(the bet), and that if she continues taking these risks to undermine you she will lose all of it and be asked to leave. This can be as simple as saying 'No' and not giving her more attention.

Remember, if she bets on black and wins, her bets will get bigger and bolder. You will have to call bigger bluffs and burn more of her bets to regain your leader role. But for her to bet bigger and bolder or even MAINTAIN her bets on red she needs the payout.

You do not conform to a woman, you simply exist as the house and when a woman likes you she will conform to you by making consistent red bets. All you need to do is pay out red bets and burn black bets. This will bring a compatible woman into your life and maintain her respect.


When she loses all her money(your respect for her) from betting on black she will be kindly escorted out of the casino. Of course she is always welcome back if she is able to regain your respect, and the only way she can do that is by being sweet and betting on red. Never give women an unlimited bankroll or a loan. If they lose your respect, they have to earn it back.

This can be applied to all people in your life, but women are by far the biggest gamblers in this game. Watch their bets carefully, follow the rules above, and your casino will be full of love(people that bet on red).
 
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EyeOnThePrize

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90% of women in America follow something called “the rules” where they bet on black to get your attention. They might neg you to knock you down a few notches, flirt with other guys to raise their value and make you jealous enough to chase, or give you the poker face and pretend you don’t exist.

90% of women are completely insecure. Are you going to dismiss 90%?

Once you become “high value” enough and every woman is targeting you, these are the difficult decisions you will have to make. A part of you is attracted to her, but another part of you looks at her as an insecure h0e.

Meanwhile all your supplicating friends think you are gay for not going for her.

They will think “who do you think you are for judging and dismissing hot chicks while the rest of us are starving for a little bit of validation?!”
The woman's bet size and bankroll is entirely relative to you. Give every woman a bankroll. If you're just starting out with women you'll be dismissing most of them because their black bets will seem dangerous and you haven't learned to regulate them. This gives you more time to work on yourself and increase your self respect(house bankroll). When you have a comfortable cushion you can let black betters sit around for longer, even indefinitely. Let them start at the high rollers table, if they continue to bet black consider regulating them to the quarter or penny slots, where there bet size is meaningless. When they can't cover the table minimum dismiss them from the high roller table, reserved for large red bets.

When you've mastered the skill of the house you can have all black betters at the penny slots, and all red betters at the high roller tables. Never escort them out if you wish. Let them all have a chance at validating you.
 

EyeOnThePrize

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Ive never had that view of them. Women dont conscously think this way. Men think this way
There's countless threads on here with men talking about women's 'tests'. Just talking about it in terms of 'test' implies you're the test taker. You're right men think this flawed way, and women pick up on it and play along. Being the house instills the proper masculine mindset in a man imo.
 

Tilex

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If I witness a chick doubling down on black, I start to become more hostile.
It's a natural defensive mechanism I have against manipulators and con artists.

If we're not on the same team, then that chick can f*ck off!
 

EyeOnThePrize

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If I witness a chick doubling down on black, I start to become more hostile.
It's a natural defensive mechanism I have against manipulators and con artists.

If we're not on the same team, then that chick can f*ck off!
I think a lot of men do this, myself included. But being flustered or emotional exhibits weakness. It shows that things aren't going your way and you don't know how to handle them. In dog training we're taught to always be calm and assertive to maintain a pack leader role. If your dog sees you have unstable energy it will be less likely to follow you, it will actually lose respect for you and see it as a cue to be dominant for the leader role. And a dog isn't loyal it it fears you. I think the same goes for people.

As a leader you dismiss or inspire with calm collected energy. You can't force it either. The feeling has to manifest naturally. It's a fun life long practice.

I know exactly where you're coming from. It seems some women don't understand you want them to leave unless you get hostile. But if you think of the house, they never get emotional. If a gambler doesn't follow the rules they're escorted out and it's back to business as usual. No second chances, no hard feelings, just a pragmatic focused attitude that doesn't waste time on bs.
 

flowtheory

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Sh*t tests imply a woman is some kind of authority to appease, that you must 'pass' or 'fail' their tests.
This mentality is too limiting and warped.

Instead think of yourself as a casino(the house) and women as gamblers.
As the house you control the outcome of every bet.
Red is rooted in love and giving, black is rooted in fear and lack.
The money is respect.
Women should always win when they bet on red and always lose when they bet on black.

You will only pay out(respect) the women that consistently take the risk to bet on red(love).
You will impoverish(check/dismiss) the women that are foolish enough to consistently bet on black(lack/hate).


When she bets on red:
-She makes plans and invites you somewhere well in advance
-She comes over to treat you
-She compliments you in front of others
-She supports your endeavors and shows her faith in you as the leader
She is risking her money(her respect) on the idea of love. You should reward her risky bet with admiration and affection. Confirm her belief.
Pay out so that she is encouraged to bet even bigger on red.

Do not take her bets on red for granted. Paying out these bets is VITAL to an ideal relationship.
If you do not payout when she bets on love, she will be discouraged from continuing to bet on red. It will feel one sided to her and she will wonder why she's betting on love at all. She may stop taking care of herself or otherwise become bored or frustrated that she can not please you. When you consistently reinforce good behavior she will come to treat you as a god and keep herself looking like a goddess for you.

When she bets on black:
-She tries to put you down in front of others
-She takes your things without asking
-She doesn't respond in a timely manner
-She is not accountable for her mistakes or responsibilities
She is risking her money(her respect) on the idea of hate/fear. She is hoping you will submit to her, that you will pay her out, but you never will. You will call her bluff, stand up for yourself, and she will lose her bet money(you will dismiss her). She will be encouraged to lower her bet size until she stops betting on black.

Sometimes a woman who has been winning on black will double down. You will call out her bad behavior and she will try to twist it back on you or to upset you. If you call her bluff again she may double down again and again until she is betting all your respect for her(her money) over a marble. You should disengage(burn her bet), and dismiss her until she starts redeeming herself with healthy bets. Notice there is no doubling down when she bets on red, because she wins, another reason you MUST payout on every red bet.

We focus a lot on what to do when she bets on black because many men are nice, they let things slide, until they are brainwashed. This is not taking her bet money. This is telling her that she can bet on black as many times as she wants. Instead calmly but sternly make it known that she has lost some of your respect(the bet), and that if she continues taking these risks to undermine you she will lose all of it and be asked to leave. This can be as simple as saying 'No' and not giving her more attention.

Remember, if she bets on black and wins, her bets will get bigger and bolder. You will have to call bigger bluffs and burn more of her bets to regain your leader role. But for her to bet bigger and bolder or even MAINTAIN her bets on red she needs the payout.

You do not conform to a woman, you simply exist as the house and when a woman likes you she will conform to you by making consistent red bets. All you need to do is pay out red bets and burn black bets. This will bring a compatible woman into your life and maintain her respect.


When she loses all her money(your respect for her) from betting on black she will be kindly escorted out of the casino. Of course she is always welcome back if she is able to regain your respect, and the only way she can do that is by being sweet and betting on red. Never give women an unlimited bankroll or a loan. If they lose your respect, they have to earn it back.

This can be applied to all people in your life, but women are by far the biggest gamblers in this game. Watch their bets carefully, follow the rules above, and your casino will be full of love(people that bet on red).
John Gottman, the leading expert for relationships called this ‘bids’. Partners bid for each others attention through positive or negative means. He could predict with staggering accuracy if partners would last based on the attention gave and received alone.

Tests are a game so an individual can foster a sense of power. Women want to be lead by a man who has his emotions in check; that’s essentially what tests are there for.
Eventually when a woman becomes ‘submissive’ it’s because multiple tests were ‘passed’, relative to her standards; meaning she trusts and feels safe so she has personal allowance to let down her walls and “open” up, in so many senses of that word.

In many ways once a man has trained his senses of what to allow or dismiss its much like the psychological experiment of pavlovs dog. If you truly desire a life of love, as it’s in highest accordance with your overall life’s aim, it’s about training ones own mind to only accept and reward what we individually deem qualitative to those around us; not just our prospective partners. So after many months of a woman being given no attention for dramatic behaviour, she sees this approach as a waste, as she’s been subconsciously taught.
 

Kaido

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shouldn't this be a part of the DJ Bible if it isn't already?
 

Speculator E

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shouldn't this be a part of the DJ Bible if it isn't already?
The purpose of the DJ Bible just like the real Bible is to teach the basics to newbies. Some subjects are too advanced to be put in there.

And to the OP. The purpose of Bold font is to highlight a few key words or idea.
When you bold half your post it really defeats the purpose of using bold and it becomes annoying to read.
 

EyeOnThePrize

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The purpose of the DJ Bible just like the real Bible is to teach the basics to newbies. Some subjects are too advanced to be put in there.

And to the OP. The purpose of Bold font is to highlight a few key words or idea.
When you bold half your post it really defeats the purpose of using bold and it becomes annoying to read.
I'm not sure how bold text percentage annoys you, but that sounds like a personal issue.
If you'd like to be my editor please PM me your CV.
 

Speculator E

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I'm not sure how bold text percentage annoys you, but that sounds like a personal issue.
If you'd like to be my editor please PM me your CV.
I just had a hard time understanding what your main point is because half of it's was in bold.
Because I had a hard time reading it I didn't feel like reading it all.
So in the end your post didn't get read by many people.
Did you get my point?
Most people have short attention span
 

RangerMIke

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I'm not sure I believe in 'tests'. If a women isn't attracted to you she isn't going to care what her boundaries are. If she is attracted to you, what people call 'tests' are just women testing HER boundaries, if she's testing her boundaries it is a indication she is interested. They are just like children, she's testing the boundaries just like a child. She's trying to see what she can get away with.

Now if you give into what people call 'tests'... well... that means she isn't having to work for you, you are making it too easy. A woman has to work for you otherwise she doesn't value you.... no value: no appreciation or respect... no respect: no love.

Women are children.

As a parent, and you give into your child all the , what happens? The kid becomes a spoiled misbehaving brat.

As a man, and you give into your woman all the time, what happens? ...... Get the point.
 

BadBoy89

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The analogy is too complicated.

All a man has to do is make a move a quickly as possible with a woman. Her actions will reveal how she truly feels.

If a woman *tests* a man, he should tell her to knock it off. She does it again, she is demoted to a sex toy.
 

sosumba

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Great analogy!

All you need to do is pay out red bets and burn black bets.
How would one pay out for example? Is it validate her and give more compliments, buy flowers or sweets or simply just give her more attention?
And what is burning in this case? Just ghosting and ignoring?
 

EyeOnThePrize

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Great analogy!


How would one pay out for example? Is it validate her and give more compliments, buy flowers or sweets or simply just give her more attention?
And what is burning in this case? Just ghosting and ignoring?
It's entirely situational. The first few times I witness behavior I don't like I may ignore it or disengage. If she doesn't get the hint and it persists I'll kindly point it out in a direct way. If it continues I point it out one last time, sternly, after that I walk. Again it depends on what the behavior is.

If she talks about exes I'll do the above. If she hangs out with exes I go straight to walking.

On the flip side if she gives me a genuine compliment I'll give her one back with a butt squeeze or a peck. If she does something thoughtful I wait a week or two then surprise her with the same. If she insulates me from distractions when I'm honing a craft or otherwise supports my endeavours in an obvious way then I'll consider something just as deep or deeper like a trip somewhere she's been wanting to go or an event she's been interested in. Maybe I'll give her a massage and cook her dinner, it all depends.

These are just examples of my unique flavor. You'll inevitably have your own. The important thing is not exactly what you do, but to be consistent. Reinforce what you want, dismiss what you don't.

What men get caught up in is stuff like arguments with a girl. They think that when they call out her bad behavior and she pushes back that they should push back harder. What they're really doing is giving her more attention when they should be giving her less. They're reinforcing a bad habit.

I don't have arguments with a girl I'm seeing, it simply doesn't happen because she knows from the beginning I won't tolerate it and walk. We can discuss things openly and in a civil manner, but if she raises her voice or says something in an attempt to put me down, I start asking myself why I should put up with it. I live under the philosophy, 'give her enough rope and see if she hangs herself'. It's effortless to enforce and keeps only sweet responsible women in my life that enrich it.

When she's hostile or upset always be the calmer one. If she crosses a line be stern, but remain calm.

When she's bubbly and loving be open and reflect her love back at her, enriched with your own.

Win through action, never through argument. Keep your hands clean.
Always say less than necessary.
Never seem to be in a hurry. Behave as though you have everything you need and everything you want will come in time. Your attention has value, invest it wisely.
 

ubercat

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I think that is the opies point there is no test. Mike is correct as always boundaries can be one element she wants to test. Sometimes she just wants to spice things up and get a little bit of drama going. Sometimes it's insecurity she wants some reassurance that you care for her. And acts like a brat on the grounds that any attention is good attention. And of course they won't think this way at all they've been trained to the stuff from birth they just feel and the behaviour comes out.
 
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