Not a nice guy but not quite a PUA yet. What to do?

[Someyungguy]

Right now it seems that I'm stuck in the middle between AFC and a Jerk. I might actually be more on the side of a jerk though.

See, when I first started my job a year ago I was a hudge AFC. I would completely supplicate to all the girls, always do things for them on command, etc. Then halfway through working there I found this site and started my journey to become a PUA. The werid thing is I always got called cute by the girls for being so polite and treating them like queens. Since I started improving myself though and becoming more of a man, I don't get that anymore. I feel like I'm kind of "out there" right now. I'm not this super polite, gulible kid anymore, but I'm not quite a man either.
Lately, I've felt like a bit of a jerk. I've been treating the HB9 at my work pretty bad. At first she loved it, but it seems to be getting old now. See, I'm not really after her because it's too late, but I still see her 3-4 times a week and so I flirt and try out new stuff on her.

Also, there's about 4-5 people that go do stuff outside of work together(clubbing, bar, etc...) and just like in high school (we're all 20 at my work) I still don't get invited. I'm known as a big joker so I don't get whats going on. One thing I have noticed is that its the hot girls and hot guys that socialize outside of work. It's like they are drawn together. Damn aristocracy!


Anyways, I'm just wondering if anyone else is in this territory right now and if they have any advice to help to get out of it.


Thanks,
Yung

 

[Someyungguy]

It's only really the girls that are starting to think I'm a bit of a jerk. But I'm mostly known as a big joker I'd say.

 

[upsidedownside7]

Maybe being a big joker has turned you into seeming desperate for attention. I used to be the same way and always try to make people laugh. You lose respect that way. It's important to show your personality but direct conversations without actually doing the talking by asking open ended questions. I've loosened up and do my own thing but I notice everyone I communicate with in my environments, end up following me around. I've gotten more respect as a jerk rather than a joker. Messed up huh? You don't have to be anything, just apply some of the principles here and there and follow your own agenda. Out...

 

[Someyungguy]

bump

 

[BRYCEicl]

Forgiveness

Someyoungguy, maybe you need to think real hard about yourself and your past and ask yourself why you are so mean. Where there any occurrences in the past that made you treat people the way you do now? Maybe you have some forgiving to do, because I know that I was in your shoes when I finally snapped. I had been an AFC and I became a jerk after this one girl July pulled away from me when I tried to kiss her. I think your position is normal in the road to a DJ but now it's time to move on.

Make sure you aren’t just some angry youngguy taking your anger out on people because we can see through that. I say you read the second article in the DJ bible about being a man. Remember don't worry you are still learning.