"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Nobody's Workout Journal

Nobody

Don Juan
Joined
May 1, 2006
Messages
167
Reaction score
1
Starting Weight: 108 lbs
Goal: 140 lbs by December


Breakfast: 20 OZ Milk375 Calories (20 g Protein, 20g Carbs, 37.5g Fat)
Gushers Fruit Rollup 50 Calories (12g Carbs, 1g Fat)

Pre-Lunch:
On Whey (24g Protein)110 Calories

Lunch:
Chicken Fries (12g Protein, 18g Carbs, 15g Fat) 260 Calories
French Fries (3.1 g Protein, 40.8g Carbs, 20.4g Fat) 361 Calories
Coca Cola

Pre-Dinner:
Peanut Butter (28g Protein, 28g Carbs, 64g Fat) 800 Calorie

Dinner:
Spaghetti (60g carbs, 11g protein)

PreWorkout:
ON Whey (24 g protein) 110 calories

Post Workout:
ON Whey (24g protein)
Sugar (40g?) 270 calories

Before Bed:
Skim Milk (20g protein, 20g carb) 160 calories


166g Protein
239g Carbs
74g Fat
2740 Calories

How is my diet?



Here's my workout:
Day One:

Dips or Bench Press 2 x 6-8

Incline Press, or incline Fly 2 x 10-12

Military Press, Or Hammer Shoulder Press 2 x 6-8

Tricep (skull crushers) Extensions or Tricep Pushdowns 2 x 10-12

Heavy Abs 3 x 10

Day Two:

Pull-Up 3 sets to failure

Barbell Row 2 x 8

EZ-Bar Or Dumbell Curl 1 x 10

Squats 2 x 10

Deadlifts, or Stiff-Legged Deadlift 1 x 10
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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EFFORT

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 17, 2003
Messages
2,115
Reaction score
45
Location
USA
protein= 220g
carbs-250
fat-100 or whatever comes with the protein
 

Nobody

Don Juan
Joined
May 1, 2006
Messages
167
Reaction score
1
Espi said:
First off, I admire your effort, but 32 lbs. in 6 months? That's a LOT of weight, bro. You;ll be lucky to gain that much weight in two years...sorry to say it, but I just feel it's not reasonable to gain that much weight...
Dude, are you f'in serious? Why even try if it'll take 2 years?
 
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