No such thing as girl friends

[becker]

I think when it all boils down, when you or a girl are friends with each other, it seems that it will start with some degree of attraction, otherwise, it will be considered mere casual acquaintances, and you will probably not hang out with each other outside of whatever context (normally school) that you guys normally hang out.

For example, I know many girls from this internship that I'm doing, and while I'm at the office, I am friendly with all of them, but most I will not consider hanging out with outside of the office. One reason is that I'm not that attracted to all of them, even though some are very attractive.

I think that this could potentially be a good gauge for if you're deciding whether a girl likes you. If she won't even hang out with you outside of school, for example, it may mean she isn't interested in you at all.

Any comments?

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

IMO,

Any girl/guy friendship comes down to at least one party being attracted to the other party in a more-than-friends kinda way.

We see it everyday with the chumps who "hang out" with girls, as friends hoping to progress to the next "level".
It goes both ways, too.
I finally realized this, when I noticed that since i started dating my current girlfriend, all the girl "friends" I have aren't around anymore. They've more or less cut off contact with me. I knew all along that a few of these friends wanted something more, all along.
I didn't, so it never went anywhere.
I'm convinced that it is impossible for girls and guys to be friends, and stay good friends for any long periods of time. I keep all girls at arms length, otherwise they fall in love with me, and the frienship goes out the window.

We are different from women.
Why on earth would you want to hang out with a girl, as friends? They talk about silly trivial, unimportant things like hair, clothes, shoes, and get upset over little things; like why you didn't call in the past week.
It's annoying enough to deal with, when you ARE getting some action..........

Acquaintances (meaning you can laugh, and chat when ever you bump into each other)...........YES.

Friends (meaning, call each other all the time and hang out, everyday)......... NO
Impossible. It'll last for a very short while, then you'll get bored and stop contacting each other.


The Bad Ass Canadian

 

[becker]

Great insight, BadAssCanadian, and I have to agree with you, unfortunately. It's tough though, to always treat any interaction with a girl as being more than friends, but in the end, it seems like that's the only relevant part of the relationship.

It's difficult to be friends with a girl mainly because there's always that tension. There's this one girl that I want to be friends with, but she seems to think I'm looking for more. I think having girls as friends is a good way to learn how to be comfortable around women, otherwise every time you're with a girl, part of it will be trying to gain experience in interacting with women, and if you are inexperienced, you might spoil your opportunity when you might have been more prepared with some practice.

 

[Engetsu]

Sorry to bring this up after so long, but this is a very interesting debate that I don't fully understand.

With the experience I've gained, I've come down to the conclusion that there was no such thing as girl friends, just like the previous posters.

However, this one girl almost changed my mind after I told her about my no girl friend policy. She told me that it's a better key to understand women as long as it's clear and it was stated more than non-verbally between the two parties that there was nothing more than friendship involved.

My final conclusion would be that I CAN have a girl friend, as long as I don't want a relationship or ass out of her.

Who agrees?

 

[GropeDope]

I was great friends with a girl (AKA ****tease) for a while during the time that she was going out with another guy for a few months and I definitely wanted to hit that from the start but at the time I didn't care that much if I ever did cause she was cool just to chill with anyway and I was BAFC. She would let me "friendly" kiss her on the lips and whenever I would try to do more than that she would push me off and say stop that (even though in female talk that really means keep going but I didn't realize it back then).

Well they broke up and she was looking for a rebound and I was pretending to be too busy to do anything with her anymore. I liked her and wanted to bang her even more now that she was single but thought there's no chance that would ever happen since she was such a ****tease w****. I guess this caused her IL (that I knew she had otherwise she would have kept the kissing to only on the cheek) to skyrocket because she got drunk with her friends one night and around 1:30am she called me and told me she wanted to see me (booty call) and we ended up ****ing the same night. All I did was went up to her to make a friendly kiss hello and she stuck her tongue in my mouth. First and only time a girl put the moves on me LOL. Moral of the story? Friendship is long, long over and we don't talk anymore but at least I got some!

On a more serious note people...I don't think the "girls as friends" concept works in the long run unless the dude is gay or the girl is busted and the guy couldn't ever imagine ****ing her. If there is any sexual attraction at all from either side..even in the slightest form, then it won't last. Eventually one of the two will physically try to hook up with the other, and whether or not it happens, that's the point where the friendship ends. MY experience tells me that the only true exception is when you're friends with a ****tease cause then she won't care if you try to hook up all the time cause she'll keep rejecting you but be okay with it, just like you.

 

[Nightspark]

ah yes the old debate which has spanned many many aeons...

in my opinion it's a very very hard thing for me to do to have girl friends in a non relationship way... which is why i have the old policy that i NEVER have Ex's as friends... (never tried to, easier to forget her that way)

right now however my Ex you could say is sorta more of an aquaintence and that's it... i seriously dont see myself hanging out with her or going out of my way to call her for anything... that's how i see it really...

it is impossible in the long-run because eventually if no contact comes in both parties abandon it all...

 

[DJnomore]

I disagree

Think of your sisters friends. Wasn't their one that you would like to have sex with but you didn't want to incur all that baggage? You know your sis hating you etc.

You didn't want to have a relationship and she wasn't the most attractive girl you could possibly want but if you knew for sure 100% that nothing bad would happen you would spend the weekend with her.

Now imagine she felt the same way. You both find the other attractive but not quite attractive enough. You would have sex with her but you don't want to have a relationship with her.

That is the kind of girl-friend I think you can have. That doesn't work for ex unless you both feel that way.

 

[MrBond007]

I have a girl-friend and I beleive shes goin to be the only one Ill ever have.I know her ever since we are kids and our paths crossed many times and now we hang out some times.She`s the only girl I value as an equal to me.I would take a bullet for her and Im sure as hell she would take one for me.She`s like a male friend but shes a woman.

To clarify:

1)I have no sexual interest in her.Shes not ugly but shes not up to my taste.

2)Shes the only girl I can keep around me while not thinking about banging her and then throwing her away.She has proven her loyalty to me many times and its something I cant disregard.

 

[madgame]

I have a girl friend who Ive known for a couple of years and who Ive always been nothing but friends with and she has a b/f of 4 years or so who she hooked up with before I knew her.

There are exceptions to every rule though.

I have to say I dont think its impossible to be friends with girls. I am friends with 3 girls and neither one of us wants to hook up with each other (anymore), but u can still be friends with some girls, cause believe it or not, not all of them are stupid attention *****s (though A LOT are).

 

[becker]

When I first saw the title to this post, I was thinking, oh, that's not necessarily true, then I saw that I was the one who started it. Must have been a while ago.

I know a girl right now who I work with and went to school with, and she's very attractive, and could be a model easily. She's engaged though, and I really believe that I'm friends with her and I'm pretty much cool with that. I don't look to do anything more with this girl. I think it all depends on how you look at it. Just don't get all emotionally involved and just be your own person and there won't be a problem with girl "friends", and it actually makes you more attractive.

 

[THA REALNESS]

'Bout the hanging outside of school thing.

Some b1tches don't have lives .And that's real talk,more than half of them sit home and watch soaps and dvd's all damn day but it's acceptable for them to do that cuz they are broads and that's their traditional role ,keeping up the house .


But whatever you can't really ever tell so if she doesn't hang with you what are you supposed to think?


Girl-FREINDS? NO. GIRLfreinds. Yes .


I hang with the ho's also but i do not consider them my freinds just people i hang out with. I know the benefits they bring but overtime the negatives will get to you. I suggest you broaden yourself out to hang with others in the office (male and/or female).

Something is up you feel it but you just don't know it. Remember i said that.

 

[THA REALNESS]

DID YOU FORGET!

REMINDER: "Something is up you can feel it but you just don't know it" _THA REALNESS.




OBEY ME ,YOU MUST!!

AN AFC,I AM NOT!!!

SPOKEN,I HAVE!!

 

[diplomatic_lies]

I have friends who are women.

I find as I grow up (well not being a teenager anymore), it gets easier. You dont necessarily want to f*ck every girl you meet, theres some you get along with.

Usually some girl ends up hanging out in your group, and after a while you get used to it.

Its not hard.

 

[J-Man]

most women are a waste. some people have rare, close non hoes theyve known for years or are engaged etc. so there are exceptions...

but WTF... overall, women are such a waste of time. its inevitable for either

1: a relationship to happen/someone to try to make it happen.

2: it gets boring and ends.

women are a waste of time! if you wanna really get laid (aka: not hookers) then youre gonna be wasting time. why on earth would you waste MORE of your precious time? if youre not busy getting laid, hang out with real friends. LOYAL, HONEST, NICE, RATIONAL people (aka: men).

its not a question of whether or not you hate women. i personally dont.

but it IS a question of whether or not you understand inferiority in women. if you dont, then you minus well make all the female friends you can, because youre going to die a virgin anyway.

of course, there are exceptions to this. there are some really rare women who are capable of having pure friendships with you, even without them being engaged/knowing you since you were two were 6.

and if you meet one, i suggest you forget about friendship and get married to them as fast as possible...