No Sex For you...

[Weak_Game]

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT?"

I then said "honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that ***** knows I'm smarter than her.

I so enjoyed this.

 

[Desdinova]

"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.

In other words, you're boring.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her.

That was dumb. You sacrificed a day's pay because your woman told you you were boring.

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that ***** knows I'm smarter than her.

And what did you accomplish? You took a day off work to get revenge on a woman who thinks you're boring.

I'm also having a problem buying your story.

 

[Desdinova]

Now that I realize I've just responded to a quote :crazy: I have to ask, what where did this came from?

 

[DJDamage]

Kinda reminds me of that scene from the movie "American Beauty" where the guy wasn't getting any either and he started to jerk off right there in bed with her lol.

 

[Desdinova]

It's a JOKE Des...

Okay, now I really feel like an idiot, but it's all good!

 

[Weak_Game]

A friend sent it to me, i thought it happend to him.

It sound VERY VERY AFC'ish.. i agree with with what you said ...

But i like how in the end even though he was a huge nerd he pulled through and schooled his lady. Whoever he is, he came out on top to an extent without buying her crap and proved a point.