"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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No problem Approaching, just setting up a date

Dr.Gonzo

Don Juan
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Mar 15, 2009
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Hi there,

Now while I am still improving on my approach game, overall I feel that I easily connect with girls and (with my good social skills) can continue a conversation provided she's down. However what I find is my biggest problem is after I talk to them and get a number they always flake out on setting up a date. Maybe it's my texting style or maybe they can sense my loneliness I just don't know but does anyone have any advice? This has happened the past few girls and I believe it is my insistence on getting the date instead of small talk? Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated as I feel this is holding back my day game.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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pLaYtHiNg

Senior Don Juan
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Mar 30, 2009
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Yeah, don't come off desperate, hun. I'm sure the guys here will give you better advice, but maybe do the small talk... intrigue them, then go for a, "Hey what do you say we grab lunch?" type of line. Girls who just meet a guy and (he) doesn't want to do the small talk before asking them out is kinda creepy and sends off red flags. Just my two cents.
 

ready123

Master Don Juan
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Nov 16, 2007
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Los Angeles
how exactly are you connecting with them?
 

GuanYu

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 20, 2007
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Something that I've noticed recently (especially with women your age 18-22) is they don't necessarily like official dates. It's much better to act like you're going to do something anyway and she if she wants to come along.

With two different chicks, one 18 the other 21 when I tried to setup "dates" they basically told me, "they didn't want to promise anything without knowing what life had in store" etc ..basically saying if something better came up, friends/family needed help, etc...

So try being less formal about hanging out and it'll be a lot easier.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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