"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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No motivation, focus or ambition.

Jariel

Master Don Juan
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I've fallen into a rather serious rut lately and can't get out. I was a straight A student, hoping to get a 1st and pursue a career teaching English, but through no fault of my own I've been f*cked up by administration errors and have been landed with twice the lectures and work of the average student. I haven't kept up well, my grades have dropped and everything I worked so hard for is all falling apart.

Needless to say, I'm feeling really disheartened. Seeing how much red tape is involved in academics, I've been put off teaching (and anything remotely academic) altogether, have no career aims and no incentive to study. All I want to do now is go out and hang with friends all day.

If anyone has overcome the same kind of setback or can point me to some good books, I'd appreciate it.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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TheInfamousCBear

Master Don Juan
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Look man, you did really well in school...At least stay in school...When you start hanging out with friends all the time, its hard to get out of that...At least you are in school, I was starting to go back to school this year and I was doing well and I was gonna pay off my debts, but I got laid off for 6 months, then I got into an accident and totaled my car...Then I tried to save up money to buy a little cheap car and I got laid off again and I ended up buying a new car and the next day after I got the car I got fired for something I didnt even do...Now the credit card company calls and they want all their money at once, and I cant ask anyone for money cause everyone I know is broke...I wanted to move out but that or school arnt even an option...You put blood sweat and tears to get those A's, dont throw that sh1t away and end up like me...
 

Julian

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Dude whenever i get in a rut. I sit back, smoke some weed and think about the things i have. Then im good to go and i im back ready to attack anything in my way.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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DJDamage

Master Don Juan
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It could be that you are juggling too many things at once. Its not worth quitting because you will regret it later. Its best to finish your degree so that at least you can pursue other things in the future.

Ever thought about maybe not taking the whole coarse load and becoming a part time student? if you can't handle the work and your grades are suffering then instead of biting the bullet, you should lean back a little bit and take fewer coarses. Sure you will graduate a year or two later but its better then not graduating at all.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

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