No Masturbation for 6 months! Join in!

[heater528]

if i dont do it i last like a 2 pump chump when it comes to ****ing... i will give it up as a hobby but i will continue to do it when i know im going to get some.

 

[Persephone]

I've been lurking here for a week or so, trying to collect material for an article, and actually registered so I could reply to this thread. I doubt that I'll say much more, but I really wanted to say this:

I go through Lent every year, so I can relate to wanting to stop something for a while, especially when that something is a bad habit, but ask yourselves this: is masturbation a bad habit? Or are you carrying around a lot of baggage left over from medieval Catholicism?

One of the things I love about being a woman is that whacking off doesn't have any strings attached. It's just an orgasm or two. I can even use any applicances I want without anyone thinking that I'm a freak, or at least without anyone thinking that I'm a freak in a bad way. I have no sense that masturbation drains energy or vitality, and I have no sense that it decreases my sex drive. I have no guilt about it. I even have no guilt about my smut consumption, and no sense that it infringes in any way on my sex life. In other words, I can masturbate with impunity and simply bask in the resulting good feelings.

Now, it wasn't always this way. I've read a lot of posts here where men are slamming feminism, but one of its more positive side effects was that women started asking questions about the cultural constructs that defined female sexuality. Women weren't supposed to want sex. Women weren't supposed to come. Women were only supposed to come through pen*le penetration (impossible for around 90% of us if one wants it consistent and without any grinding of the man's pubic bone against the cl*toris), or cl*toral orgasms were "immature." Absolutely, women weren't supposed to masturbate. Women were biologically programmed to be faithful 'till death did us part and only want sex within marriage, and then we were only supposed to want it on the bottom, under the blankets and in the dark. There were only two kinds of women, and one single slip-up tossed you forever into the wh*** category. Being pregnant or having kids should automatically kill one's sex drive. The list goes on ad nauseum, but the bottom line is that feminism included a reclaimation of female sexuality that is still incomplete, but still making progress.

Now, male sexuality isn't really fully realized, either. I can go into the history at considerable length, but what the part that's relevant here boils down to is the notion that the only acceptable venue for male orgasm is the female body. We call masturbation "onanism" because of the mistaken belief that God struck Onan dead for it, but what God was actually upset about was the fact that Onan was refusing to impregnant his brother's wife, an act that would have disinherited his own children. It had nothing whatsoever to do with masturbation, but it got hooked into it by people who decided that any form of non-reproductive sexual expression was a sin and that reproductive sex was a necessary evil. St. Jerome in particular found sex vile and disgusting, "an experiment of the serpent," and called women even worse for inspiring desire. Marriage (read: culturally sanctioned reproductive sex) was a "foul and polluted way of life."

This means that if you're going to be true to the core values behind the idea that male masturbation is bad, then you shouldn't be ejaculating at all, and if you're so spineless and wimpy that you must, it should be into an unprotected vag*na. Period. Think about it, and decide if you really buy this.

Here's another thought, too. In a rush to define "masculine" as merely "the opposite of feminine," we may be returning to Jeromish thinking where male sexuality is concerned. Now that women are free to masturbate whenever they want and with anything they want, are we going to define "manliness" in part as an absence of masturbation? Am I the only one who thinks this is completely insane?

Short of a behavioral addiction, which can develop around anything that feels good, there isn't a thing wrong with masturbation. It simply decreases tension, although exactly how varies in men and women because orgasm has completely different effects on male and female brains. Masturbation is a way of coping with our constantly-on sexuality, which is a side effect of the fact that we have no mating season. Nothing more. The whole notion that male masturbation is "pathetic" is a cultural construct along the lines of the notion that orgasm in women is a sign of mental illness.

In the case of a behavioral addiction, it's best to address the underlying issue. Trying to stop the behavior without doing so is like putting a butterfly bandage over a severed artery. If masturbation is interfering with the rest of your life, get help and from a reputable therapist, not from Christian websites.

Testosterone and sexual tension aren't bad things in and of themselves, but in combination and excess they have at least one negative side effect. They not only give your temper an unpleasant edge, they also give that temper a very short fuse. I would not want to share space with a guy who was that ragged, much less a guy whose frustration level was so high that I became little more than a pressure valve. The mere, physical act of f*cking doesn't have the same built-in, biochemical rewards for women that it does for men (we have them, they're just different), so the sort of sex machine this is going to turn you into is unlikely to appeal to anyone sane. It's also not going to help your performance in bed. Women are far, far, far more likely to get off before your d*ck goes in. A man too frustrated to tolerate foreplay isn't going to be much of a lover.

So have fun, guys, but stay the heck away from me until it's over!

Persephone

 

[Egoist]

wow persephone, awesome essay

but i have to wonder how it relates to this whole thread?

we are not talking about giving up masturbation up forever or especially for religious reasons or because we believe that it is bad for you.

just experimenting with trying to contain it a little bit.

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

Hi Persephone,

You raise some very valid points especially in regards to feminism.

One thing I want to let you know is that on these boards there are a few who hate the entire idea of feminism. These are the guys who are bitter and haven't gotten over their bitterness.
Please don't hold it against the rest of us who see the good points.

I personally think feminism is great, in the equal rights and sexual liberation department. Men and women are equals, and I'll always hold that belief as the truth.

But, we can't deny that we are also different. We have different natural instincts upon which we choose appropriate courses of action for any given situation.

The problem with certain aspects of feminism is the man-hating and the tipping of the scales in the other direction. There are alot of women out there who hate all men and want to turn the tables on us.

It is the church's fault, more than anything that women were opressed, and I have a real hair up my ass about organized religion, so I don't see it as entirely being the men's fault, more so than a social conditioning set into place by only a select few men...unfotunately.

As far as orgasms and masturbation is concerned, men and women ARE VERY different. That I know of, there is no real biological change in a women when she orgasms. That's why many can have 2,3,..7 in a row and just keep going.

Men, on the other hand experience a pretty drasgtic state change upon ejaculating. There's tons of chemical reactions that tkae place in the body and once the deed is done, we lose all desire for sexual contact; until our bodies replenish.

After ejaculating, i feel tired, lethargic, passive and satisfied.

I have no desire to pursue any women.

A healthy regular sex life is fine, but for alot of guys, masturbation becomes a routine that they do almost everyday or everynight... just like making coffee or watching TV... it becomes a habit and after a long time of this constant depletion of semen, the man's body starts to remain in a constant passive state. Depression and anxiety can step in as well as a whole wack of other nasty side effects.

I have not had sex or masturbated in over 2 weeks and I can't describe the feeling... and everyday, I wake up feeling stronger and more alert and sharp. The brain fog is gone and my wits are back. i can almost equate the feeling to getting hopped up on stimulants... it's a natural high, but I don't come down.... not for one second of the day.. It's just a very alert and stand-up kind of frame.

It's a fire and zest for life that I haven't had since I was a teenager. I'm naturally confident, my interactions with people are always very direct and "alpha" and I'm not even thinking about it. I'm just acting naturally, but with body getting itself back up to peak performance I feel like i have control again.

Will I stop completely? probably not, but I've decided to go as long as i can.. Women will be my outlet and they will have the time of their lives. I'll be a machine.

I hope that helps.

 

[Persephone]

Thanks, Egoist! javascript:smilie('')

Really, all I'm asking is that you give some thought to why you think you need to contain it at all. Do you really have a problem, or are you just suffering from a lingering bit of Jerome-induced cultural guilt? And if you do have a problem, is the masturbation a symptom or a cause? If the former, is giving it up going to accomplish anything, or will you just turn into the sexual equivalent of a dry drunk?

From a female perspective, a sexually wound-up man who has no outlet but his partner isn't a lot of fun to be with, in bed or out. Even worse if he has moral issues because he probably has moral issues with a lot of other interesting things, but bad enough if they're just a free-floating sense of wrongness. After a while, one starts to feel like a place to put his d*ck when it gets hard and to put the sperm when he's done, which is not a thrill. Not to mention the rotten temper once he's dressed. Sex is a lot more fun when everybody is relaxed. So is the rest of life.

That, and certain amount of success with women, especially on a more casual basis, rides on being confident, relaxed and satisfied, not wired and desperate. Going into a seduction with the feeling that if you don't get laid soon your b*lls will blow up is going to raise a lot more eyebrows than skirts.

Even giving up a genuine bad habit can have unpleasant repercussions for those around you. I will pamper someone who's crabby and short-tempered because he's quit smoking. I will massage the sore muscles of someone who is trying to survive his first months in the gym. I will get experimental in the kitchen for someone who is trying to get his weight out the red zone. Give up masturbation, though, and you're on your own. Might as well give up blinking. Or sleeping. At least as far as I'm concerned.

Persephone

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

Originally posted by Persephone
Thanks, Egoist! javascript:smilie('')

Really, all I'm asking is that you give some thought to why you think you need to contain it at all. Do you really have a problem, or are you just suffering from a lingering bit of Jerome-induced cultural guilt? And if you do have a problem, is the masturbation a symptom or a cause? If the former, is giving it up going to accomplish anything, or will you just turn into the sexual equivalent of a dry drunk?

From a female perspective, a sexually wound-up man who has no outlet but his partner isn't a lot of fun to be with, in bed or out. Even worse if he has moral issues because he probably has moral issues with a lot of other interesting things, but bad enough if they're just a free-floating sense of wrongness. After a while, one starts to feel like a place to put his d*ck when it gets hard and to put the sperm when he's done, which is not a thrill. Not to mention the rotten temper once he's dressed. Sex is a lot more fun when everybody is relaxed. So is the rest of life.

That, and certain amount of success with women, especially on a more casual basis, rides on being confident, relaxed and satisfied, not wired and desperate. Going into a seduction with the feeling that if you don't get laid soon your b*lls will blow up is going to raise a lot more eyebrows than skirts.

Even giving up a genuine bad habit can have unpleasant repercussions for those around you. I will pamper someone who's crabby and short-tempered because he's quit smoking. I will massage the sore muscles of someone who is trying to survive his first months in the gym. I will get experimental in the kitchen for someone who is trying to get his weight out the red zone. Give up masturbation, though, and you're on your own. Might as well give up blinking. Or sleeping. At least as far as I'm concerned.

Persephone

You are missing the point completely.

This is not about storing pent-up sexual frustration and trying to find a woman for an outlet (I have many encounters with women, so I'm not some desperate chump looking to just get off)

I never meet girls with "laid" on the brain... It dictates your actions and will force you to mess up an opportunity

The whole point I was getting at is that there are many men who are so far on the otherside. They masturbate WAY too much. Did you read what I posted about side effects? This is not side effects caused by jerking off once every few weeks... it's a constant state of depletion and as men, we feel the passiveness and that forces us to not feel the fire that is life. As a woman you won't understand, because to my knowledge you don't feel these effects. (I may be wrong, but I'm pretty sure I'm not0

When we decrease the frequency of ejaculations, our natural testosterone levels rise. This puts us in the state of mind where we're the fvcking king and everyone around us can go fvck themselves. (That's just the feeling, we don't... or at least , I don't act that way)

and honey, don't even talk about morals with me... I have very little morals left. Killing is bad, rape is bad, stealing is bad, lying is bad, child molestation and sexual assault is bad... and that's about it. everything else goes, with this guy... pretty much.

 

[Persephone]

Originally posted by The Bad Ass Canadian

As far as orgasms and masturbation is concerned, men and women ARE VERY different. That I know of, there is no real biological change in a women when she orgasms. That's why many can have 2,3,..7 in a row and just keep going.

Men, on the other hand experience a pretty drasgtic state change upon ejaculating. There's tons of chemical reactions that tkae place in the body and once the deed is done, we lose all desire for sexual contact; until our bodies replenish.

After ejaculating, i feel tired, lethargic, passive and satisfied.

Actually, orgasm shuts down far more of the female brain, and for longer, than it does the male one. Specifically, orgasm turns off the amygdala, pain centers, prefrontal cortex and hippocampus in women without much effect on the reward centers, and the biochemical flood is pretty much the same. The reason women are usually still wired after partner sex is because we don't usually come with our partners. Intercourse doesn't do it and cl*toral stimulation rarely goes on long enough. However, women often use masturbation to orgasm as an insomnia cure specifically because it relaxes them and puts them to sleep. For some women it takes one orgasm and for others it takes more, but it does wear us out quite nicely.

Also, studies done in Germany found that sexual release has no physical effect on athletic performance. That particular association, at least, is probably a self-fulfilling prophecy. American men especially think they will do poorly after sex, so they do. The Europeans I know are a lot less neurotic about it.

But say you're right and orgasm has devastating effects on male psychology and physiology. Okay, well, thank God I'm a woman! I can have all the orgasms I want, in any setting I want, by any means I want, without any detriment to concentration or performance at all. From where I sit, male sexuality is enough of a gulag as it is: brief orgasms achieved only one at a time, plus a drive that seems only to fill a physical need, like the desire to eat or take a dump. Add negative side effects when orgasm is achieved, especially by hand, and blech! Greater physical strength and a slight advantage in spatial reasoning do not make up for this.

If that paragraph makes you squirm, think hard about what you believe about your own sexuality and why, because a lot of what we knew about women has turned out to be pure myth. We once believed that orgasm was such a major cause of insanity in women that surgery was done to prevent it. We laugh at this now. Will we someday laugh about what we now think we know about male orgasm?

Persephone

 

[g g g unit]

kk then count me in !!! lmao i doubt il make it 2 a month tbh lol.

 

[On_the_Top]

Ahh hell, got nothing else better to do than beat my meat so I'm in too.

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

Originally posted by Persephone
Actually, orgasm shuts down far more of the female brain, and for longer, than it does the male one. Specifically, orgasm turns off the amygdala, pain centers, prefrontal cortex and hippocampus in women without much effect on the reward centers, and the biochemical flood is pretty much the same. The reason women are usually still wired after partner sex is because we don't usually come with our partners. Intercourse doesn't do it and cl*toral stimulation rarely goes on long enough. However, women often use masturbation to orgasm as an insomnia cure specifically because it relaxes them and puts them to sleep. For some women it takes one orgasm and for others it takes more, but it does wear us out quite nicely.

Also, studies done in Germany found that sexual release has no physical effect on athletic performance. That particular association, at least, is probably a self-fulfilling prophecy. American men especially think they will do poorly after sex, so they do. The Europeans I know are a lot less neurotic about it.

But say you're right and orgasm has devastating effects on male psychology and physiology. Okay, well, thank God I'm a woman! I can have all the orgasms I want, in any setting I want, by any means I want, without any detriment to concentration or performance at all. From where I sit, male sexuality is enough of a gulag as it is: brief orgasms achieved only one at a time, plus a drive that seems only to fill a physical need, like the desire to eat or take a dump. Add negative side effects when orgasm is achieved, especially by hand, and blech! Greater physical strength and a slight advantage in spatial reasoning do not make up for this.

If that paragraph makes you squirm, think hard about what you believe about your own sexuality and why, because a lot of what we knew about women has turned out to be pure myth. We once believed that orgasm was such a major cause of insanity in women that surgery was done to prevent it. We laugh at this now. Will we someday laugh about what we now think we know about male orgasm?

Persephone

I really don't know who you think you're talking to.... You say you've been lurking around here for awhile... I'm assuming you've formed a biased opinion of me, based on what type of discussions go on, around here.

That said, your paragraph didn't make me squirm. I am a very sexual being and I'm quite comfortable talking about this sort of thing, even face to face with some of my closest friends. I have very little shame, in that aspect.

I would never think that there's NO changes in a woman's state after orgasm, but I'm confident in saying that the changes aren't as drastic as for men. And, to make this clear, i'm talking longterm changes and a steady decline in testosterone from sexual exhaustion. This isn't weeks or months of masturbation.. The type of changes to a mans mentality and physiology come from years of excessive masturbation, ontop of an already healthy sex life, for many.

I can't deny this fact, because of the changes in me since I've stopped... and it's only been weeks. And I wasn't a 5 times a day kinda guy, either. more once a day or 3-04 times per week. Plus the sex.

I'd doubt that masturbation will affect athletic performance, the day before a game or some such scenario.... but, once again, the longterm effects of depletion and low levels of testosterone will have an effect on the athlete.

BTW, I'm curious to know what type of article you're writing? You've been lurking here, reading in on what's being talked about, so I'm assuming that most of us would rather not know...

 

[Bourne]

This whole idea of not masturbating was discussed in another thread by gunswitch I believe

"Stop the masturbation, cut it off. Get your sexual gratification from real sex. If you are only jacking off, you are fooling your unconcious mind to make it think that masturbation is real sex. Stop it right now and get real sex. When you stop masurbation you are more active, you will approach more women and you will see them as only source of real sex gratification, not your hand. It is essetial. Force yourself not to masurbate untill you fill your sexual desire with the roots: real sex with women bodies. That way your mind will be educated in few moths after few secual encounters."

I think that is the whole idea behind this post. Getting sex from a women and not your hand. Increasing your testostorone levels and getting laid, but not by your hand.

Count me in. Starting today.

 

[mroriginal]

Heres the list so far..............

SamePendo

nw1512

Phantasmal

C00L

Kerensky

Boner da Stoner

mroriginal

brosnake

monroe

strams4ever

steroidsrule

handle

Aquatico

drdrew

tyte3

The Bad Ass Canadian

arlanda

Sophomakhos

Rec_rejection_phobic

lets_do_this

g g g unit

On_the_Top

Bourne

Apollo_Jordan

Dover

MetalFortress

philly_95

Levex

ChampusMaximus


________________________________________

THEY TOOK 'ER JERBS!

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

I find the whole "list" idea a bit redundant...

 

[Persephone]

Originally posted by The Bad Ass Canadian
I really don't know who you think you're talking to.... You say you've been lurking around here for awhile... I'm assuming you've formed a biased opinion of me, based on what type of discussions go on, around here.

That said, your paragraph didn't make me squirm. I am a very sexual being and I'm quite comfortable talking about this sort of thing, even face to face with some of my closest friends. I have very little shame, in that aspect.

I would never think that there's NO changes in a woman's state after orgasm, but I'm confident in saying that the changes aren't as drastic as for men. And, to make this clear, i'm talking longterm changes and a steady decline in testosterone from sexual exhaustion. This isn't weeks or months of masturbation.. The type of changes to a mans mentality and physiology come from years of excessive masturbation, ontop of an already healthy sex life, for many.

I can't deny this fact, because of the changes in me since I've stopped... and it's only been weeks. And I wasn't a 5 times a day kinda guy, either. more once a day or 3-04 times per week. Plus the sex.

I'd doubt that masturbation will affect athletic performance, the day before a game or some such scenario.... but, once again, the longterm effects of depletion and low levels of testosterone will have an effect on the athlete.

BTW, I'm curious to know what type of article you're writing? You've been lurking here, reading in on what's being talked about, so I'm assuming that most of us would rather not know...

You're right, you'd probably rather not know what I'm writing about! ;-)

My reply isn't about you or anyone else because I'm not the sort of person who keeps track of who posts what. It's an automatic hackles-up response to sexual myths. How do I know that this one is a myth in spite of the fact that I'm a woman? I work in a field where knowing this stuff is my job, and so do a lot of men. I talk to them, in depth, about their sexuality. I also go into historical and cross-cultural beliefs, comparing and contrasting what we think we know with what others have believed in different places and times. I follow the research because after all, I need to know this stuff if I'm going to do my job right. And I do. Male editors have to approve it and if I got things seriously wrong, they wouldn't.

As far as long-term negative effects of masturbation on men are conncerned, show me even one controlled study, much less a replication of it. Show me solid evidence that men suffer measurable, long-term physical damage from masturbation (barring ER visits to remove misused vegetables or chaffing due to inadequate lubrication). For that matter, show me proof that orgasm from masturbation is significantly different where the body is concerned than orgasm from intercourse, and that it causes what you claim it does. Controlled, laboratory studies, not anecdotes from you and your friends. Then I might buy it, but without something resembling real evidence, I'm not interested. I rarely believe anything that "everyone knows" is true.

So if you really think you have to do this, have at it! But if you're debating inside, or even feel the slightest bit guilty about what you did to yourself last night, think first. Is this really going to help you, or would you be better off taking a closer look at what you believe about masturbation?

Tschuess,

Persephone

 

[DJDamage]

Masterbation kills motivation.

That goes for everything in life.

Masterbation makes you tired and sleepy and thus hinders motivation.

Does this guy look motivated to you?? (WARNING MATURE CONTENT!)

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/videos/morningpleasure.html

if you don't have a girl its best to release that aggression in the gym.

DjDamage

 

[Apollo_Jordan]

I'm in.

 

[DJ_in_making]

Originally posted by DJDamage
Masterbation kills motivation.

That goes for everything in life.

Masterbation makes you tired and sleepy and thus hinders motivation.

Does this guy look motivated to you?? (WARNING MATURE CONTENT!)

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/videos/morningpleasure.html

if you don't have a girl its best to release that aggression in the gym.

DjDamage

omg!.........why, just why show this......

 

[DJDamage]

Originally posted by DJ_in_making
omg!.........why, just why show this......

Maybe next time you feel like pulling it out, you will be thinking of that guy and stop.

DjDamage

 

[Dover]

Im down

 

[DJ_in_making]

Originally posted by DJDamage
Maybe next time you feel like pulling it out, you will be thinking of that guy and stop.

DjDamage

that's an effective method. I aint gonna lie