No contact - tell her or not?

[dbx]

I'm going to break up with my gf tomorrow before she can me. I'm going to do NC, but don't know whether to ask her not to contact me. I assume saying nothing and just dropping of the face of the earth is the best way to go?

One problem I have is I know her contact details of by heart, so is going to require more will power not to contact her! Tips?

I'm already working on arranging more dates, which is a start!

I hate this.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

You already know what you need to do; but its understandable why its hard to stick to it.

Learn to separate your emotions from the reality of what needs to be done.

Break up, drop off the face of the earth, spend some time analyzing to figure out where things went wrong and how you can improve for your next relationship.

And most importantly find new girls who can occupy your brain and get back to doing all the things you neglected while you were in your relationship.






PIMP

 

[dbx]

tips for walking away like a rockstar tomorrow?

i don't want to hurt her feelings, but i want to leave her with the horrible feeling that she's losing something great.

 

[SoSuave666]

Don't be spiteful man...unless she has been a huge b!tch to you, then proceed with reckless abandon.

Breakups aren't supposed to be fun, so don't treat it like a game. Remember: you had good times with this girl and it's just coming to an end...nothing more than that. If you leave like a d!ckhead she will remember you as such and slander your name until the day you die (she will probably slander your name anyway, but the best way to leave is always as the bigger person). Leave with integrity. And for godssakes actually leave, don't stick around.

 

[dbx]

Don't be spiteful man...unless she has been a huge b!tch to you, then proceed with reckless abandon.

Breakups aren't supposed to be fun, so don't treat it like a game. Remember: you had good times with this girl and it's just coming to an end...nothing more than that. If you leave like a d!ckhead she will remember you as such and slander your name until the day you die (she will probably slander your name anyway, but the best way to leave is always as the bigger person). Leave with integrity. And for godssakes actually leave, don't stick around.

like i said i don't want to hurt her...

I don't even want to break up with her, but it's all but over and if I don't, she will. I'm hoping to leave her with that feeling so she will hopefully come back to me.

 

[Kawai]

I agree with SoSuave666. If you had something good with her, but it's just not working out than I personaly would let her know, but don't act like you're not sure, and stick with your plan once you put it in motion.

Others might disagree, but unless she was heartless I'd tell her. I got flamed on a post for doing exactly this. I told the girl because she honestly was a nice girl, but interest was dropping (she had occupied my time for 8 weeks-every day before this)...so my thought process was to let her know I need to "cool off" until I later this summer.

Some will say drop off the face of the Earth, but my opinion is, if you think there could be something down the road and she wasn't a b1tch to you, then do her the courtesy of saying something....otherwise disappear.

 

[Who Dares Win]

Find something else that occupy your mind, get other girls or get pissed off after getting rejected from them.

All that matters is that you dont pay attention anymore to her.

And delete numbers,saved email addresses and if you dont wanna delete her from fb to avoid drama, just make her invisible on the chat plus disable her update from the main board.

 

[Down Low]

i want to leave her with the horrible feeling that she's losing something great.

No you don't. If you act on that assumption, you'll have to keep going back to check if she has regrets. Instead, assume she's pregnant from another guy and that's the real reason your relationship has been declining and can't ever be repaired. (Like you said, she's about to pull the trigger.) Leave with a sober, unemotional statement of fact: you had a good time but it didn't work out and it's over so cya around. And then go out of your way to make sure you never see her around.

like i said i don't want to hurt her...

I don't even want to break up with her, but it's all but over and if I don't, she will. I'm hoping to leave her with that feeling so she will hopefully come back to me.

While that's real selfless of you, do you really want her to come back with another man's kid? Or with the mental baggage (and possible STD) from a banal single-chick reckless adventure? You seem to forget how much hurt she could cause you if you go back and then break up again (and again).

Put your mental and physical health first before any chick.

 

[bigneil]

In this situation, just ask her point blank: "Do you want to end the relationship?"

If she doesn't she will immediately say "NO!" without hesitation.

If she says anything else such as "...I don't know" or "....no...." then she does.

I tried the pre-emptive NC a few months back and made it 3 weeks. But because I didn't have any closure my interest only increased. I then broke down and called to learn that she was actually pining to hear from me, but then I couldn't control my desperation to see her. She called my bluff. That ultimately was the demise of the relationship.

In hindsight I should have just asked her to her face when I sensed a change.

 

[juicywa]

Most common mistake guys make is thinking we are so hot sh*t that when we break up with them (girls) that they will be so heartbroken, come crawling and beg us to take them back.

Mister, you are in for a treat. A week from now, she'll have banged 10 other guys. Reality is girls get offered penis 100 times a day, and you know this... man.
We think we're special little snowflakes when we're not.

 

[drellum]

I'm going to break up with my gf tomorrow before she can me. I'm going to do NC, but don't know whether to ask her not to contact me. I assume saying nothing and just dropping of the face of the earth is the best way to go?

One problem I have is I know her contact details of by heart, so is going to require more will power not to contact her! Tips?

I'm already working on arranging more dates, which is a start!

I hate this.

If you ultimately want to get back with her, drop her a note telling her how you feel....what's on your mind etc. Then disappear completely.
Do not deviate from your path - improve yourself in all areas and in the great scheme of things she will be come insignificant but at least you will have the choice. Good luck.