No contact is not the answer to everything!

[DonJuanit0]

No contact exists for a reason! Exists so the other person will eventually think, "what happened with ..., why doesn't he call/text". With this said, going no contact for every f*ckin reason is stupid!

I am seeing so many posts either saying I went nc or someone else reply to a question with the brilliant idea of going nc!

For no contact to work, someone must have first made his intentions clear! For example, I can't understand people who go nc to a girl without firstly trying to show her their interest! How on earth is this girl ever going to get the message? She is probably gonna think, "wtf happened with ... ? did he just stopped talking to me for no reason? I better find someone else as my emotional tampon" or "he found himself a girl, good for him" or maybe even worst, "did I do something wrong? or is he acting crazy for no reason?"

The thing with women is that with "friendzone" being their main shield, in their brains, they do believe you are really friends! Yes, they actually believe you are friends, it may start as a way of telling you no, but later on you actually become their FRIEND. Going no contact to them is like a buddy of yours going no contact to you! You will probably ask why because it's your buddy, but women have tons of friends like you, or other people waiting to replace you! They probably won't even care!

Another thing I see a lot, my girlfriend did that and that to me what should I do?

-GO NO CONTACT! (BOOM SHE IS BACK TO YOU BEGGING LIKE A DOG)

are you even serious?!? you might even give her a reason to break up with you! FIRST!

If she is your gf, and is something you probably over-analyze, cause this is happening a lot here, just talk to her! Is it so f*cking hard? If you don't like the answer or whatever, break up with her, and then go no contact, so she will miss you and understand what she did wrong!

No contact can always be gold, I know, I've used it, it works! But, you can't use it without the other person know why this is happening, and you can't expect it to fix everything!

No contact is for the other person to realise they miss you, not to magically solve everything!

 

[countwoofoolah]

I think it depends on the situation

NC can help , if you need to walk away from something and have the stones , its the best policy , where the whole , only halfway there method...just messes with the head

Think sometimes play the game but dont become a pvssy about it , be a man

but be a man who commits himself to where he stands and sticks with it

 

[DonJuanit0]

That's exactly what I am saying! It depends on the situation! What I see her is go nc, go nc, go nc! NC is not a magic trick! People here have much better things to provide rather than always go NC!

 

[VladPatton]

Ok, I am now convinced that No Contact is the most misunderstood concept on this forum!

 

[DonJuanit0]

Ok, I am now convinced that No Contact is the most misunderstood concept on this forum!

Could you please expand? I respect your opinion so I would like to read your comments, since as I understand you oppose to what I say.

 

[VladPatton]

I'm not opposing what you said. I stated that No Contact is one of the most talked about techniques here. The key to it is when to do it. That when is dependent upon what the situation is. There is no magic formula for when you should go No Contact.

Sometimes it is in your best interest to keep contact because of other possibilities within her social circle. Other times it is best to cut her loose completely because she was a bıtch with you right from the start. Other times you can't because it's her apartment, or her dad's house, so you have to endure more pain until you can do it. It all depends. Perhaps it's a girl at work. Even stickier.

However, in most cases it is for the guy's mental sanity after a certain set of actions has been attempted. Or, a failed relationship has been exhausted. It is all case by case.

What is it is not, is a tactic to get a girl back or re-interested in you. This will mostly likely be 90% ineffective for the guy. A lot of guys come here after trying this as a tactic "to get her back". That's where the confusion begins.

So when is No Contact appropriate? I don't know, what's the situation? It all depends on certain factors. Could be 2 factors, could be 200.

 

[DonJuanit0]

However, in most cases it is for the guy's mental sanity after a certain set of actions has been attempted. Or, a failed relationship has been exhausted.

Yeah, forgot to mention that, which might be the most important! Probably because I couldn't stand seeing the "go nc" advice again for no reason and I simply wanted to say what I did!

It is also being done by someone to recover and find his strength. Forget about that specific girl and try to move on! Again, depends on the case as you said!

 

[mikey2012]

No contact helps you get over a break up by cutting all ties. It can also help you regain power because it shows indifference .

If you have balls. When you find yourself falling for a girl go NC. This is a circuit breaker to keep your emotions in check otherwise you fall into AFC beta dom. Then she will dump you.

If you go NC And she comes to you then you will regain your power

 

[Johnny Alias]

Dude NC is meant to save your sanity, pride, or life. If you're going NC with a chick it's because you're not a good match, she's a stage five clinger, she's a crazy kook, or she willfully stomped on your heart. The last one especially. She treated you with callous disregard and like a toy she got bored with threw you away or to the back of the closet.

NC is for you not them. NC is mean for you to lose ALL emotional attachment to someone. NC is for you to take the pvssy OFF the pedestal.

Getting her back? Expecting contact? If you're indifferent because you truly followed NC you shouldn't CARE. In real NC you're not getting any texts, vms, emails, whatever because you have completely BLOCKED her. Even mutual friends should be told you don't want to hear about it. This is NC and anyone half assing it is not following process.

Any communication received hits the reset button. Period.

She should be a ghost. A memory. Not a living breathing vampire sucking the life out of you. Not a crazy kook stalking you.

A memory.

Why would you want her again when you went NC for a reason and there are sooooo many chicks out there?????