No CONTACT 2 weeks in.

[BigSteve28]

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=224761

That's the link to my breakup if anyone happen to read it two weeks back. I have been in total no contact since then. No text from her and none sent from me, and like I had said. The chance of us meeting out of chance in this city of over a million is slim to none as we have different social circles.

It's been a bit rough as I do love her and was very much in love with her and if I didn't say I thought about her a few times a day and wish I could speak with her I'd be lying to you all. I actually met a new girl last week and we spent Saturday and most of Sunday together at my house, she seems like a great girl and from being in a relationship where the woman was very aSexual to hanging out with a girl who is very comfortable with her sexuality was a big change.

I can tell this new girl is not wife material from talking to her for about a week and hanging out with her this weekend but she is a lot of fun and would be a good substitute for my vacation and I'm pretty sure she'd be down to go if I asked her. She's constantly initiating with me and wants to hangout and text me every morning with a good morning text and text me before she heads to sleep.

I know initially I said my plan on this no contact was to let a month ride and then eventually have dinner or drinks with my EX like she wanted to after the breakup as we said we'd be civil and friends. As of now I still am intending to do this. I may feel different about it in two more weeks. I am sure a lot of people here will be against that and say it's a bad idea, however I think its the closure in this I need.

I have been reading and listening to Mark Manson's book called Models and I'm enjoying it and think its full of great advise. I see where I have went wrong with a few previous relationships by being the guy who is agreeable with stuff, womens opinions and what not, and by going against them is actually in your favor. Some of the things about neediness I also understand and would suggest it to you guys as theres some great material in it.

I'll post back in two more weeks before I initiate with my EX if I even do, I may feel totally different about it by then. Thanks for your support earlier on with my problem. I appreciate it.

 

[hockeyfreak79]

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=224761

I know initially I said my plan on this no contact was to let a month ride and then eventually have dinner or drinks with my EX like she wanted to after the breakup as we said we'd be civil and friends. As of now I still am intending to do this. I may feel different about it in two more weeks. I am sure a lot of people here will be against that and say it's a bad idea, however I think its the closure in this I need.

I have been reading and listening to Mark Manson's book called Models and I'm enjoying it and think its full of great advise. I see where I have went wrong with a few previous relationships by being the guy who is agreeable with stuff, womens opinions and what not, and by going against them is actually in your favor. Some of the things about neediness I also understand and would suggest it to you guys as theres some great material in it.

I'll post back in two more weeks before I initiate with my EX if I even do, I may feel totally different about it by then. Thanks for your support earlier on with my problem. I appreciate it.

Good progress man! Having fun with this new girl for alittle bit & then move on. As she isn't gf material. Try to get in the mindset that you don't need closure. Accept the fact that she didn't feel any chemistry with you. That's all you need to know.

Stick to no contact, 30 days will not be enough. 60 days might not even be enough? Trust me ever guy on here will say stay away. For your sake I hope you do. You will be reset back to day 1. I've done before were I thought I was truely moved on & sure enough the sh*t came back & hit me like a ton of bricks.

 

[rsox28]

Good job...no contact really is the way to go.

As for possibly meeting up with her in a month or whatever, if you're in a good place go for it. I think closure is important (is for me anyway), and if that'll provide it you might as well. I'd rather have that awkward conversation knowing I've said what I've said versus not and regretting it later.

 

[Bingo-Player]

well done on the two weeks ,but keep on going

usually takes me between 4 & 6 weeks to get over a chick.....and its important not to check up on her AT ALL during this period

eventually you will look back and laugh at this experience :rockon:

 

[salinechow]

Everybody has said it, but I want to reiterate it to you. 1 Month is not enough. 30 days is a strong milestone but it is also a red herring. 90-100 days minimum before a reinitiation of contact. Trust me.

 

[GS750]

I think once you hit the 4 month mark of complete and total No Contact you are good to go.

 

[BigSteve28]

The whole breakup thing really had me bummed and the trip planning being disrupted was the icing on the cake. I'm a bit relieved that I found someone who I know I'd have a great time with. I had considered taking my EX and she obviously wanted to still go but I knew there was a good chance of having boundaries I wouldn't like.

No one wants to be in paradise for 7 days sleeping in the same bed, unlimited alcohol and get back to the room and initiate sexually and be told no...over and over which possibly would of happen. I decided to do ME on this trip and make myself happy and have a good time for myself and stop worrying about her wanting to go and that I had planned on both of us going together. It's time to start worrying about #1 and put myself first from now on in relationships even though it goes against what my parents always taught me growing up.

Times have changed a lot and women nowdays are not like my mother, or your mother. Most of them have different values and different angles and a lot don't even know what they want.