"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Next move? Or being friendzoned?

Th3Alchemist

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Hi! I'm new to this forum and for the thing I've been reading here I find it awsome! I got this situation here:

So there is this girl in my college, and I've met her once in a college dinner party and since then we've been exchanging phone messages, where we kinda flirted...

Sometimes I tryed to get the conversation more sex related but she tries to change the subject and I don't insist about those talks.

Once I was in college and asked her if I would see her today and she replied that she wanted to stay home and study and was feeling "lonely".
Then I asked her if she wanted me to come over and so but she gave me the "no" saying that only if I insisted we could meet at some coffehouse and "talk" :s

I ignored as I wasn't even interested and now she keeps trying to have friendly talk, somethims even in the middle of the night. But as soon as I start talking about some interaction I could have with here... she changes conversation...

Have I been to nice to her and being friendzoned? Or is she looking for a serious relationship with me?
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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You havent really given me too much information but based off what you have said I would say the following...

You are being very pushy through text you need to be more C&F than trying to sexually escalate via text. Use those for when your IN person and can PHYSICALLY escalate. Text or rather Sexting is done after you build some sort of sexual relationship with her and more.

Don't ask to hang out tell her when your availible and what your doing and if she would like to become an addition to your already awesome plans then she can if not who cares your doing something fun! Dont do the usual movie and dinner be different and exciting!
 

JumpOff

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Th3Alchemist said:
Hi! I'm new to this forum and for the thing I've been reading here I find it awsome! I got this situation here:

So there is this girl in my college, and I've met her once in a college dinner party and since then we've been exchanging phone messages, where we kinda flirted...

Sometimes I tryed to get the conversation more sex related but she tries to change the subject and I don't insist about those talks.

Once I was in college and asked her if I would see her today and she replied that she wanted to stay home and study and was feeling "lonely".
Then I asked her if she wanted me to come over and so but she gave me the "no" saying that only if I insisted we could meet at some coffehouse and "talk" :s

I ignored as I wasn't even interested and now she keeps trying to have friendly talk, somethims even in the middle of the night. But as soon as I start talking about some interaction I could have with here... she changes conversation...

Have I been to nice to her and being friendzoned? Or is she looking for a serious relationship with me?
Your next move should be to MOVE on. Reread your post and look at all the red flags. For instance, she stayed away from any sexual talk when you tried to initiate it. Second, she turned you down when you offered to come over when she was "lonely." ANY girl who likes you will go out of her way to see you, this doesn't sound like one of them.

She invited you to a coffee house for some "talks"??? I'd say you already sound like a FRIEND to her. That's something FRIENDS would do. So yes you're FRIENDZONED.

The only reason she is still contacting you if for an ego fix. The only affection she has for you is for your ability to stroke her ego whenever she DOES contact you.

Get out. Don't talk to her. Move on.
 

Th3Alchemist

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yeah well that's what i suspected...

just don't know what happend since she always started the flirty messages and the moment when it get's warm enought and I try the next step, she cuts off... and that made me confused...
 

Asterisk

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Sounds like she's trying to lure you in with flirts so you'll orbit her.
Don't fall for it.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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JohnChops

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No more keyboard jockeying . Action is the place.
Asterisk said:
Sounds like she's trying to lure you in with flirts so you'll orbit her.
Don't fall for it.
Never be an orbiter. Have you made a move? If not then thats your next move. Youll know if shes fully interested in you if you go in for a kiss. After that escalate to sex and if you make it to sex then you have your answer if shes interested or not :crackup:

Ask her for lunch /dinner/ party/ drinks/ pretty much anything and just have a good time with her. You seem to be over analyzing too, when there really isnt much going on between you two. You guys are still strangers, open her up before you move on. Dont be quick to jump the gun on nexting her.

Dont text her so often, set up the date and then text her a couple of hours before to confirm. Keep texting to a minimum , unless she texts you first. You must keep you air of mystery man! And dont talk about sex, show her your sexual instead! ITs more fun for the both of you. Touch her, tease her, have fun with her.

IF she is cold on the date, doesnt respond to touch, denies you a kiss then you have my permission to move on and go find another girl . Good luck buddy :D
 

thevilittletroll

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sounds to me like you didnt build any comfort with her. you went from building some attraction and went straight to seduction. with all your sexy talk and your escalation you are coming off as a player. it doesnt sound like she's the type of girl thats very promiscuious. your gonna have to build some comfort with her, more rapport type conversations, dreams, goals, grounding, volnerable stuff. then you can escalate more. if you cant get her to meet you out try on the phone. if you cant get her to come out after that then next. she's just being polite
 
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Th3Alchemist said:
btw... MisterSisterFister used the term C&F... what does it stand for?
****y and Funny
 

Greasy Pig

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Sorry OP, but I think you're in the FZ. Any girl who was even mildly interested in you sexually would be more open to your advances.

I did notice that nowhere in your post did it mention they you actually asked her out on a date. You asked to "hang out", but I don't think that qualifies as actually organising a fun, interesting date.

Maybe ask her out for a drink and see what she says. But my gut tells me she's just not interested.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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