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Newbie with a question about Tao of Steve...

lowi5

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I'm a newbie with a question about the film Tao of Steve I recently watched.

I feel I have a good understanding about rules #2 and #3, but rule #1 seems to confuse, the rule about "eliminating desire".

I do understand about eliminating desire, but I was confused in the movie when he was telling his buddy not to be friends with women either. I'm confused about the fine line that exists between eliminating desire and simply being there with a women and falling into the friend zone.

Could anyone shed some light on this?

Thanks!!
 

What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.

You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

lowi5

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I'm sorry, could anyone shed any light? I've read through the material but still really confused about eliminating desire, but at the same time not falling into the friendzone. I just can't wrap my mind around it.
 

Night-hawk

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What Dex means when he says "be desireless" is to stop acting overt with your desire towards a particular women.

Recall his buddy. He is a goof and women easily read him as a no challenge beta-boy. Dex tells him he can't be friends with a woman either because they will sniff him out like a turd at a scented soaps party.

To "be desireless", according to the 3 rules of being Steve, is to create sexual tension by being covert with your desire. It's the ambiguous nature of not not acting on your desire, while not
having it become a consuming, distracting, force.

Foolhardiness comes from unrestrained desire, as Dex's buddy so outwardly shows. This is why he can't 'get it', because his desire (exuberance) is so obvious, haha.

Its Buddhism 101

Be aware that the principles (or Tao) that Dex follows comes from the awareness that many times guys who have little to offer and who don't get women easy, be that because of looks, wealth, or status. can improve by learning and becoming mindful.
 
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Tell her a little about yourself, but not too much. Maintain some mystery. Give her something to think about and wonder about when she's at home.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

lowi5

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Hi Night-hawk,

So wouldn't being in desireless state lead to being a friend? I think this is where
I am tripped up.
 

Night-hawk

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Not necessarily. Being desireless means you are not attatched to specific outcomes, which means you are not looking for unmet expectations to be satisfied. Desire leads to suffering due to attachment to that which you lust for not reciprocating back, therefore leaving you again unsatisfied.

A common error in beta behavior is the lack of self control. You become lost in your romantic whims and dot take into account the lack of reciprocation from the girl. Your constant cravings (for example, sex) from the woman remains unmet and because of that you suffer.

One of the reasons girls are attracted to the 'bad boys' is because they do not give off an air of craving, which is another way of saying, desire. Therefore the girl is kept on her toes and likes how he isn't trying to suck satisfaction from her, so in return she wants to satisfy him in return.

So think of desireless as non-craving and non-attachment. The difference between a friend is that naturally you don't have the above, so with a girl you want to fvuk you must be mindful to relinquish those I mentioned above, while still creating the attraction. The beauty of seduction is getting a girl to crave you.

It's all about the ability to see several moves ahead. Experience and knowledge improves foresight.
 
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