NewMan
Master Don Juan
a chance for what?
I think your going to continue to do what you are doing now - until you get caught.
Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single
She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.
You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.
The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.
New underpant, but not for me
- Thread starter Mustache
- Start date
I think your going to continue to do what you are doing now - until you get caught.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Bad_Lil'Pixie
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 27, 2005
- Messages
- 253
- Reaction score
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You “felt” cheated on 10 years ago, did she really cheat on you or not???
You let this feeling of betrayal develop and fester inside you for 8 long years then you began cheating on her for some kind of internal feeling of revenge that is obviously not working for you very well, because you are not sniffing her panties.
So, regardless of this entire past suspected or actual cheating, can you put it aside now?
Can you and her work together to clear the slate and begin again?
I think you have a beautiful woman who loves you very much; I also think you have an opportunity to get your relationship back on track.
She has told you she loves you, she has the look of a woman in love, she has made love to you -- sounds to me like she is trying and taking steps toward proving herself to you, are you buying?
Maybe try some guidance, be it couple therapy or individual, take steps to try to harness these vengeful actions and suspicions and really begin to grow with her.
I wish you the best and I really think you can pull it off if you want to.
You let this feeling of betrayal develop and fester inside you for 8 long years then you began cheating on her for some kind of internal feeling of revenge that is obviously not working for you very well, because you are not sniffing her panties.
So, regardless of this entire past suspected or actual cheating, can you put it aside now?
Can you and her work together to clear the slate and begin again?
I think you have a beautiful woman who loves you very much; I also think you have an opportunity to get your relationship back on track.
She has told you she loves you, she has the look of a woman in love, she has made love to you -- sounds to me like she is trying and taking steps toward proving herself to you, are you buying?
Maybe try some guidance, be it couple therapy or individual, take steps to try to harness these vengeful actions and suspicions and really begin to grow with her.
I wish you the best and I really think you can pull it off if you want to.
Dude...I'm telling you one thing:Mustache said:You guys are great
I am 40 and she is 45, a beautiful woman
She said she loved me, days before our travel
She looked like someone who loved me very much
I think I really look like the scared man of the story
I thought she had contacted a private eye and broke into my computer when I was absent. In my mind she had found out all the my emails and messages to the girls which I typed and was planing a heavy revange (cheating me a lot)
I am feeling a bit better now, you are really great
Maybe this was about to happen but not yet. It´s just an advice, a chance for me. What to you guys think ?
NEVER confess to her. NEVER. NEVER. NEVER. Don't let guilt make you a fool.
Instead, change to be a better man. It is very hard to find good women out there. You choose her as your wife for a reason.
Bad_Lil'Pixie said:
I am considering confess her
But if she could not hold it ? my confession could cause a disaster
And the worst will be if she had not cheated on me 9 years ago
This only she knows because it is inside her mind
I think she will not forvige such a thing
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Yes Latino, I´ve read it nowLatinoman said:
I will not confess because the pain could be very great for her
About her, I think I have been cheated but I had never evideces
I would it be harder for me if she was cheating me now, but the guys
said is only my imagination, and I also think so
The best thing you can do is change for the best. For the best = what's best for you (e.g. happiness). And it appears that your happiness is based on having this relationship. So...do nothing stupid to jeopardize the relationship.
Now that we determined what makes you happy (e.g. good relationship with your wife), we can move to the next step:
This is not about YOU. This is not about HER. It is about the RELATIONSHIP.
The thing about confessions...
What would you gain by confessing in this issue?
Well...she will lose trust and respect for you. In fact, she will never trust you. She will be VERY hurt too. But on the other hand, you will feel relief and you will feel a load out of your shoulder.
So, how would you think it will help the relationship if you confess? Once you consider the outcome of the confession (e.g. her feelings and yours after the confesion), what would you think it will happen to the relationship?
Now that we determined what makes you happy (e.g. good relationship with your wife), we can move to the next step:
This is not about YOU. This is not about HER. It is about the RELATIONSHIP.
The thing about confessions...
What would you gain by confessing in this issue?
Well...she will lose trust and respect for you. In fact, she will never trust you. She will be VERY hurt too. But on the other hand, you will feel relief and you will feel a load out of your shoulder.
So, how would you think it will help the relationship if you confess? Once you consider the outcome of the confession (e.g. her feelings and yours after the confesion), what would you think it will happen to the relationship?
Latinoman said:
Latino
I think that if she had cheated on me it could be easier for her to compreehend
However if she had not done such a thing, she would sure not forgive me
Consequences could be too tragic
Of course I like my adventures, but they does not worthwhile if compared to my marrige. I can live without my adventures
Too good that I found this out soon, because if I continued cheating maybe I could find out that I love her, when it´s too late
I am an spiritualist, but Ive learnt by these lesson that even a spiritualist can fail and revange when the pain is too great
And I was so blind that I could not realize how much I love her
Mustache
Bad_Lil'Pixie
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 27, 2005
- Messages
- 253
- Reaction score
- 5
Mustache! - Create your adventures within your marriage!! You and her need adventure, a rejuvenation of your union. Date again, seduce again, role play, read together, explore the desire that you have kept buried for so long.Mustache said:
(Hot Monogomy - by Patricia Love and Jo Robinson) This is a great book to read together in bed at night.
Just remember, Mustache, this 'pain' you speak of could have all been self-inflicted.Mustache said:
Good luck to you!
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
No...she won't. In fact, IF she cheated in the past, she will turn things on you if you confess. She might not even confess herself. And she will make you feel myserable and guilty. But the likelihood of she confesing? Very slim. Why? Because your confession is giving her the power to manipulate you. Furthermore, her confession would take that power away from her.Mustache said:
Now...if she didn't cheat on you...then her feelings would be different and perhaps as the one I described in my other post.
Now...this is not as black and white as I'm making it to see. I'm just talking about likelihoods here.