"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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New member, loving the discussions, how to proceed?

Poweruser998

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Hey guys so I am new to sosuave, loving the discussions so far, had alot of laughs about the responses and I think many of the answers are spot on...

I was having problems with this chick that was going hot and cold saying she loves me, best guy she ever met etc... Starts acting like my gf then acts distant especially in front of her friends... I was in a LTR for 2 years so my game was sorta rusty... The last straw was when she told me she is going to have drinks with a guy she just met (Who is an acquaintance of her sister) any ways.. after her telling me this I am going ghost on her as all of you would agree...

My question is when she texts/calls should I not respond at all or wait a day or two to respond (I don't want to seem butt hurt). I didn't tell her I was bothered about the drinks thing and don't plan to I am sure she is not that dumb and if she is... Got no time for such people.

She isn't doing this to try to pressure me into a relationship because we already discussed this and she said she needs more time, I should've went ghost then, but I was oblivious to that till I read the threads on sosuave.

I have no intention or hope of continuing what we had...
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Between_The_Lines

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The drinks bit was a sh1t test on the rocks. How long have you two known each other? Who brought up entering into a LTR? Sounds like you did and she came back with a counter proposal in which you get to play the role of one of her orbiters (because that's what "I need more time" amounts to)

Unhinge yourself from the leash she's got you on, educate yourself in red pill-osophy, revamp yourself, and seek out new prospects.
 

teebear

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LJBF her and move on. Treat her like you do your male friends and the behaviour will come naturally to you. You will also have to accept the truth that she's just not that into you. A woman who is into you will not confuse you.

Read the DJ Bible if you haven't already. Great stuff.

There are tens of thousands of women out there whom you could hook up with. Don't get hung up on any one woman, ever again. Just when you think you've found something special, somebody better will come along.

Want to jumpstart your recovery and skip some of the trial-and error? Hit the gym and learn about style. Invest in a nice pair of shoes and clothes that fit.

Don't worry about learning routines and running lines on women. Be a bit of a mystery to them and watch what happens.

Best of luck to you.
 

jurry

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If you're done with it then why bother responding?

If you're trying to pull her back in then yea wait a day or two, be unavailable, and more importantly start looking for new girls or whatever else you enjoy doing with life that isnt her.

It'll either fizzle out on its own or she'll be all over your nuts.
 

Poweruser998

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Thank you guys, I really appreciate taking your time to respond, spot on responses as I expected :)
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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stevo

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I don't understand the problem.

You too are not exclusive

She wants to go out on date with another guy, uhm ok? As you should with other girls

And you want to take 2 days to respond to a text? Nah men that's kindergarten.

Again, I don't see the problem here.

If you're too available, then become unavailable. How? Stop initiating. She hit you up, you respond. Short convo you give her the hey hit me up later, I'm about to go do blah the blah.

Before we get all these headaches have you even fcuked this girl?

Listen, a girl can date whoever she wants, you're not threatened by that.

You want a girl that sees every other dude in the pile but chooses you over all of them.

Trying too hard to not act butthurt is you actually acting butthurt.

When she hits you up, set a date (opportunity for sex to happen) and escalate.

Life is simple.
 
B

BlueAlpha1

Guest
Leave. She's trouble.

I remember being down this road. I was in a bad place with my "trouble" starting in 2011 and didn't get my head on straight until 2014. I needed an entire overhaul in my thinking and it sounds like you do too.

It doesn't have to take 3 years but it will if you don't do your part, which means actively working to change your mindset. It is a self-fulfilling prophecy that will eventually set you free.
 

Poweruser998

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stevo said:
I don't understand the problem.

You too are not exclusive

She wants to go out on date with another guy, uhm ok? As you should with other girls

And you want to take 2 days to respond to a text? Nah men that's kindergarten.

Again, I don't see the problem here.

If you're too available, then become unavailable. How? Stop initiating. She hit you up, you respond. Short convo you give her the hey hit me up later, I'm about to go do blah the blah.

Before we get all these headaches have you even fcuked this girl?

Listen, a girl can date whoever she wants, you're not threatened by that.

You want a girl that sees every other dude in the pile but chooses you over all of them.

Trying too hard to not act butthurt is you actually acting butthurt.

When she hits you up, set a date (opportunity for sex to happen) and escalate.

Life is simple.
Ive been banging her at least 3 times a week 2-4 times a day, we agreed to be exclusive and not bang anyone else (Ya I brought it up, I know I shouldn't have).
 
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