"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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New here... problem..

asianJewey

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I got a girlfriend who cheated on me, but she don't know i know alot about it. What should i do to get back at her? ... i feel so played and weak right now, i know her so so long.. wouldn't of EVER known she would do something like this to me... I'm just dead right now. hard to eat, sleep, play... im a wreck!
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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WaterTiger

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Want to get back ar her? Find a prettier girl and start dating her!
 

iqqi

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How long were you guys together? The worse part is always when the rosy glasses are YANKED from your face, or worse even, when they are stomped and broken while they are still on your face!

I feel your pain.
 

hbxdoode

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get back at her? for what? dont waste your time and energy doing such things. just leave her and move on. its going to be hard at first, but it will get better... give yourself some time to heal and you will.
 

Axcell

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Depends on how long you have been together for. If you want to get revenge on her, doesn't seem like you truly 'love' her.
If you have been together and she is a really great girl, she may have just made a mistake. Wait some time to see if she talks to you about it, because she may.

And if you really love her, you will talk to her about it and go from there. You don't even know the full story, so you cannot just cheat on her with another girl, that isn't going to solve anything, at least not permanently.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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asianJewey

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yea..

well, she been emailing this guy for awhile now, its the guys fault for sticking his leg in the relationship.. whining how he misses her and that shes with me... eventually my girl gave in and started emailing her too.. i saw them kissing and hugging before, Caught them.. I don't even want to know what else they did further than that.. it feels like it slashed my heart. i notice she dont kiss me, nor hug me anymore, her excuse is she doesnt like 'kisses'... and we been together for almost 2 years..
 

asianJewey

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^^ Axcell, i do know most of the story.. it's stupid.. i hate the guy for sticking his leg inside my relationship..
 

Randallpink83

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uhh, its not the guys fault. Its the GIRL dude... I don't care if a girl has a bf, I will still fvck her... 90% of the REALLY hot girls have bf already anyhow, and I'm sure anyone of us would still fvck them. Lots of hot hot chickens cheat all the time.

So whatever stop blaming that dude (maybe hate him, but don't blame him)... This is about your girl. Put your foot down. Move the fvck on...


but sorry bro I know its hard. You might even want her back just to stop the misery you are feeling... like just a instant healing. But ask yourself if you would really want that. Is it worth it?
 

Snow Plowman

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My god sense would tell you if she is cheating and its bothering you, then break up with her.

Like WTF. Are you trying to do some black ops mission to hurt her feelings or something?

Also how naive to think she'd never cheat...look at what type of forums your on MANY chicks people are fuking who come to these sites tend to have BFs, myself including.

Your best bet is to realize that your messing up your own self feeling down and not eating. She is feeling just fine cheating, meanwhile your messing with your own mind feeling bad. MOVE on.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Axcell

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Alright, now that you have clarified what he has done with her, I need to ask you one big question. :)
1) When you noticed she was talking to him, how did you handle the situation? Did you give her space and let her do what she wants? Or did you act very insecure and question her about it, as if you didn't trust her?

This is a post I believe that I found on a dating website a little while ago, it may help you out if you did question her about what she was doing. (The most I can do is just pinpoint what you did wrong, to ensure you don't make the same mistake again. I'm not a fan of "getting back" at my ex-girlfriends. I moan over the girl for a week or two depending on how long we were together for, and I move onto somebody new. Life is too short to hold grudges, I say that all the time. Relationships are all about learning experiences. If she did all that stuff behind your back, you should be thankful that you found out when you did. I mean, who knows, maybe it was meant to be because there is somebody else out there for you, and it does not appear to be her.

Anyway, this is the post:
You need to give your girl space, let her do whatever she wants and have the attitude like you don't really care what it is. You may feel the need to fall into the mind state of wanting to always keep your girl around you so that you don't have to worry about her getting hit on while your not there, or even worse her cheating on you... but in reality if she is the type of girl that cheats then you don't want to be a LTR with her anyway, so her cheating on you is a good thing because it let's you know she's not worthy and allows you to end the relationship before you get in too deep.

Also, if you allow your girl to do what she wants then there is always the possibility that she might cheat... but if you keep her on lock down then in the end she will almost surely cheat when she gets the chance, because by doing that you are displaying insecure, needy traits and when a real alpha male comes along she will jump at the chance to get with him.

Here is how AFCs and Alphas think about this differently : When an AFC's girl is out with her friends he thinks "What is she doing? Is she getting hit on by other guys? Is she having fun without me?"... his mind is constantly on HER. When an Alpha's girl goes out he thinks "Nice! Now I'M free to go have some fun as well"... his mind is on HIM.

However, even though you should allow your girl to do as she wishes, DO NOT let her do it at your expense. Meaning that when she goes out alone do not let her take YOUR car and spend YOUR money... if she wants to go off on her own then it should be just that, on her OWN. Being successful in a LTR is all about maintaining your alpha status and not letting her turn you into a nice guy, and a part of that is not letting her take advantage of you by using your stuff for things that do not involve you. Girls always say that they want a nice guy, but what they really want is a bad boy that they can turn into a nice guy. Don't let it happen to you, because as soon as it does you WILL lose her.


Hope I helped.
 

asianJewey

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Yes.. You helped alot. But i still cant get over the feeling of being betrayed... i dont have much friends, my family is almost broken up, she was the only one there for me for the moment... i became too blingly, mood swings and all. im pretty sure why she did what she did... it was my wrong doings... i just wish i have the chance to fix everything up and show her i could be more decent.. i got to man up to life..
 

KontrollerX

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asianJewey said:
Yes.. You helped alot. But i still cant get over the feeling of being betrayed... i dont have much friends, my family is almost broken up, she was the only one there for me for the moment... i became too blingly, mood swings and all. im pretty sure why she did what she did... it was my wrong doings... i just wish i have the chance to fix everything up and show her i could be more decent.. i got to man up to life..
Fvck that wh0re.

Whatever you did you weren't the one that cheated...er well unless your wrongdoings were you cheating on her then I'd say things are even between you two.

Anyway though a mature quality human being will break up with a person when the love fades not go behind their back cheat and then have it end either by their hand or yours.

You were betrayed and it is alright to feel that way for a while.

It takes time, distance and action on your part to move through this rough unfortunate patch in your life.
 

jimmyjack

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lol so your dreamgirl is cheating on you and you want to die because of it men wake up don't die its not the time to go you should have be doing the same thing too.you know what, be quiet and don't say anything about it until she catch you sleeping with another girl,keep boiling her any time you have the energy to boil.boil the hell out of her and be counting how many times you boiled her cause you need to let her know about how nice the game was.i hope you are not attached to her men play this game,its simple. if possible boil her in the ass.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Axcell

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Friend_ofa_Friend said:
Axcell I don't like your advice one bit, you seem to be insinuating that it is his fault that she cheated, that maybe he should investigate her 'reasons' behind it et cetera et cetera

There is no excuse for cheating. If a woman is unhappy she should just leave the guy first.
If you let a cheating woman get away with it she will know that she can get away with it and do it again probably. Cheating is the biggest of insults and humiliations, it shows absolutely zero respect. Without respect she can't possibly hope to 'love' that man.
Any self respecting man will ditch her now and never speak to her ever again. End of Story.
By no means am I insinuating that it is his fault that she cheated. I am merely stating that what has been done is done and he needs to move on from that girl and that all you can take from this relationship experience is the lessons.
Love is a learning experience, you need to go into relationships to learn what is out there to become that better DJ. Practice makes perfect, and what I try to do when a relationship of mine ends is to learn why it ended to ensure I do not make the same mistake again, and than I move onto a new girl! I apologize if I gave the impression that it was his fault, however he seemed to like my advice, so that's all what matters to me. :)

Anyway - I recently made a post on this forum in another topic pertaining to break-ups, not necessarily in cases where the girl has cheated on the guy, however, I believe this post has some useful information that you can apply to your situation.

The link is here: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=133557

However, I will simply re-paste it in this topic for those who are too lazy to go to the topic:

I recently went through a breakup, and yes, it's somewhat depressing since thoughts of your ex-girlfriend always seem to wander your mind. My advice is to keep yourself busy doing things, continue to hang out with your friends every chance you get, and avoid sulking alone as much as possible. A DJ in this forum pointed out that getting over an ex-girlfriend is quite like trying to quit smoking: You gotta stay away from the cigarettes themselves and anything/anyone that will remind you and make you want to smoke again.

However, I do have 2 posts that I have taken from DJ's on this site and possibly other sites which I copied into a word document to re-read over and over again to help me get over my ex, it might help you as well. :)

The first one: (I take no credit for it, just to help a member on this site.)
Find comfort in this: We all thought we had "the one". It's so pervasive that seduction books even have this documented! Think about that...How is it possible that so many guys seem to have lost "the one". I mean, shouldn't it be hard to find her? If she's so hard to find, then why have we all found her, maybe even more than once!

Add to that that you often realize that she's "the one" _after_ she breaks up with you. It's just your pain playing tricks on you. You'll think back and only remember the good times, how glorious and lovely they were. You'll forget the bad times, the boredom and her bull****.

Be sure that there is no "one". There will be women who approximate what you want better than others. But probably the biggest problem is that you don't actually know what you want. For me a kickass woman would combine traits of 2 of my ex's, and yet each one independently is lacking. And yes they were "the one" too.

And yet despite the relationships i've had, I'm still not sure I know what I want. For example, I've never been with a girl who can genuinely make me laugh. Maybe if I had been, that would be an important trait for me to look for. Maybe that's just the trait I'll need in my partner when I'm 90 yrs old and pissin in a bed pan.

In any case, this is like speaking logically to a woman. You can't just come out of this through "logic". It can only take you so far. You need other things in your life to start buffering your current emotions. You need other emotions in your life that start eating away at these and leave you no time to feel or think about her.


Second post: (This one made me laugh the first time I read it, and it was probably the first time I did laugh after my girlfriend broke up with me.)

I broke up with my hs sweetheart of several years when I was 19 and thought it was the end of the world. Now she's fat, and I'm glad we're not married. Later in life, my wife of seven years divorced me, and I thought that was the end of the world. Now she's fat, and I'm glad we're not married. Recently, my gf of a year dumped me. It sucks, but in a couple years, she will be fatter, and I will be glad we're not married.

Anyway, hope I helped you out. Most DJ's in here will just tell you to go date other women. Once she finds out, her jealous genes will trigger and she'll ask for you back. And the moment this happens and you realize she wants you, you'll notice you won't want her as much anymore. ;)

Think about all the starving people in 3rd world countries and how horrible their lives are at this very moment. Soldiers are getting blown up on a daily basis because of war and many men find their spouses cheating on them. The world isn't perfect, and I completely understand you were with this girl for 4 years and you may have had a vision that this girl was completely perfect, but it wasn't. It never was. Forget her.

You're 20 something, correct? You still have your youth life to live! You seem to have quite a bit of game, and you must be attractive if you were able to pick up a girl like that. You got everything all going for you so be thankful. Everything in life happens for a reason, so who knows, maybe another chick will enter your life. Or who knows, maybe even more!

Best of luck with everything and let me know if you need clarification on the information in this post.
 

Mr Autobahn

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WaterTiger said:
Want to get back ar her? Find a prettier girl and start dating her!
To rephrase this answer, find a woman that you are attracted to and meets your important criterias and most critical of all, she is attracted to you as well...

There is a reason why the quote is so true: "Hell hath a woman scorned."

But,to get down to the truth of the matter, Dude... when you spend all the time trying to "get back" at her, you are STILL in her world.

Create your own world and forget about the loser. And try to figure out why she cheated on you in the first place so it doesn't repeat. Were you too needy? Were you too clingy? There are lots of tips in this forum how to increase your value to a woman...
 

asianJewey

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Yea..

Yea, i thought she was a quality girl when i was with her, Axcel. But sigh. this really sucks.. it's not that i dont try to forget about Lilia, but it's like she keeps coming up in my head.. she sometimes INTERESTED when i buy her stuff, she goes lovey dovey, but right after she just treats me like noithing... im a chump.. im not strong enough to forget about her.. i dont know what to do!
 

AZNstewie

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WaterTiger said:
Want to get back ar her? Find a prettier girl and start dating her!
Co-sign, Success is the best revenge.

Move on man, get her name out your vocabulary, she's def. allergic to the word "loyalty".
 
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