She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.
You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.
The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
GOAL: Initiate short conversation (2-10 minutes in length) with 10 strangers. You have one week! Post your experiences/thoughts/etc... in here to motivate everyone else!Exercises
All right, so you’ve read the posts above, and you know have an understanding of how to approach people and start a conversation. Now, it’s time to do it!
Your mission is to go out and have short conversations (2 – 10 minute each in length) with 10 strangers. You can talk to them about anything, and you can talk to any person whom you have never spoken to before. You’ll find that it might feel a little awkward in the beginning to talk to strangers for
any length of time… but after the first couple of times you’ll find that it’s actually a wonderful feeling. You’ll really get a rush out of this.
Also, keep in mind that most people want to meet other people and have conversations with them, but are just too shy or insecure. So in fact, you will be doing a huge favour to those people whom you decide to hold a conversation with. Plus, I’ll bet you’ll learn new things from them, and maybe even make a couple of new friends. And in this phase of the Boot Camp, don’t let yourself feel limited to speaking to only girls… speak with anyone you want!
In fact, if you’re a bit apprehensive about talking to people, you can start out with those people who are easier for you to approach. For me, this is senior citizens, since I’ve found that most of them love talking with anyone who would give them half an ear, and I’ve found them to be very interesting
conversationalists.
After each conversation, write down in your journal what you thought of the conversation, and approximately the length of the conversation (estimate if you don’t have a watch). Once you complete this lesson, post your results, plus the topic of your most interesting conversation, and anything else
you wish to share.
You have until this time next week to complete this lesson. Also, make sure you keep on practicing the skills learned in the first lesson (e.g., you can practice establishing eye contact with someone, saying Hi, and going into a conversation. However, initial eye contact or a Hi is not a requirement before
initiating a conversation).
Also, a tip that might help you with this lesson, and the next few lessons, is the 3-second rule (You can find it on ASF). What this means is that when you find someone you might be interested in approaching, don't give yourself more than 3 seconds from the moment you are able, to approach
them. Anything longer than 3 seconds highly increases the chance that your nerves will work against you, and that you'll chicken out. Even if you have nothing planned to discuss with them, you'll find that you'll amazingly have something to say if you can only force your feet to propel you to the person.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
that's still only 15 points... lolZarky said:Aw man wish I'd done this I said Hi to more than 1300 women the past week.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Your totally right there jJLay!JLay87 said:Up to 47; I'm starting to get to the point where I just don't care what anyone else thinks anymore.![]()
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
yea thats how i got most of my greetings for week one. I think a bookstore is a good way to go for week 2, what ya think?If Sixth I Will said:Talked to about 3 people randomly. All have been in stores where I'm aisle shopping and just comment and what we're both looking at.
I even sent you a PM about enlisting and you said something about not being able to re-post in the OP of people who enlisted later on, yet you STILL didn't put me through for the challenge, even with the PM? What where you doing .......................STORING NAMES? thus why you have guys who didn't even show up for itJLay87 said:I think this week is going to be even more difficult for me than trying to get numbers. I have no idea where to even start. Ugh. Starting tomorrow though, no idea where I'm gonna go with this one.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.